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Hey, I'm kind of new here. I'm 17 weeks with my second child. A little back story on my first - I wanted a NCB, I thought I was so prepared. I opted for a hospital birth. I ended up NOT being prepared at all and asking for an epidural (during what I beleive to be transition) This time around, I know I can do NCB, I have really prepared this time. My only issue is - I really don't want a hospital birth. Ideally, I would do a homebirth(?) or a birth center birth with a midwife. Well financially - we can't afford it. My insurance is flaky and won't cover any midwives in our area, and the couple of midwives that I did talk to who feel confident they can get it covered need payment upfront. We can't do it, we can't even do payments. Such is our lot at this point in life. Unexpected circumstances took place that left us here.
Anywho, I had my second appointment with my doctor yesterday. (She is the same nurse practioner I saw last time and have always liked - have seen her for almost 10 years). I realized after I left why I don't want to go to these appointments anymore. I cannot openly talk to my doctor about what I want and expect out of this birth. At my first appointment, I asked about the on-call situation since it had changed since DS. There is a pool of 8 doctors on call and I have only met 2 of them - the rest are not in her practice. Um.. blah. Then she made the comment that "we can always schedule an induction for the doctor you want".... I was floored. She knew from my last pregnancy that I wanted NCB, I had already told her I will be doing that this time around. Her position on childbirth is the same as most doctors... managed care.
This is probably just a good vent, but I felt like I had to get this off my chest to a group of people who may understand where I am coming from.
I had decided to see if I could find a doula in training who needed another birth under her belt for this delivery. I have no monetary way to pay, but I can find a way to compensate her I hope!! THis just steels my resolve to do this and I will definitely need support!
Definitely try to find a doula. Mine was the key to my successful natural delivery. I hit a point in transition where I was done. I was at a birth center so drugs weren't an option but I would have taken them if offered. My doula kept me focused and talked me through every second.
I agree that they become desensitized. Honestly, most people are. It wasn't until I got pregnant last time and had a friend that was into NCB that I even looked into it. I would say 90% of the people I talk to IRL think I am off my rocker wanting NCB and even questioning the medical field on their "managed" care.
I have searched up to 1.5 hrs away for a birth center and midwife. It IS possible that one of the birth centers would be able to help me, but I am really leary of such long treks for so long. I work FT and I may be pushing my luck to take that much time for each appointment - not to mention my stress level of having to plan it out.
I still have time to make decisions.... I have just been putting it off hoping this last appointment would be ok and I would feel comfortable with it.