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Hospital Births


Forum: Natural Childbirth

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  #1  
April 9th, 2013, 10:06 AM
alittlelost's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 6,904
I'm really happy for those who have been able to have the kind of birth they want in a hospital, whether natural or otherwise, however, I used two TOP hospitals in my area with my first two kids, and while my experiences weren't nightmares, they were just no where near what I wanted. Having a birth plan was pointless. Requesting waivers for things was useless (such as for an IV). Perhaps I could have fought harder, but I refused some things MULTIPLE times and asked for waivers MULTIPLE times and all I got was harassed until I caved in. And the reality is, even if I never caved and THEY eventually caved, that kind of stress while I'm in labor isn't exactly part of my "birth plan" either.

My last birth was at a birth center and a much better experience. I am hoping for same, or a home birth, this time. However, there is still the possibility that my baby will come prematurely, forcing me back into the hospital setting I am trying to think positive but with the way I've been feeling physically lately, I realized that I need to be prepared for this potential outcome. But I really don't know what I could possibly do. I gave it my all with my previous hospital births and still wound up unhappy. I figure I can decide which hospital I would use in the event of premature delivery and get any waivers I need ahead of time, which might be my best shot but still no guarantee of anything. I would like some peace over this issue though in terms of feeling prepared.

Obviously if the baby was very premature my only concern would be the baby being okay, and my birthing desires would be so unimportant at that point, but my other preemies were still fairly farther alone (35 and 36 weeks) and born in perfect health, so the most likely scenario I think would be that my concerns would fairly be with having a safe and healthy birth experience, which IME means less intervention, which IME is nearly impossible to achieve in a hospital.

Any ideas to help me prepare?
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  #2  
April 9th, 2013, 10:42 AM
GranolaMamaOf3's Avatar ~Heather~
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: GA
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Is it your care provider or your hospital? If your Dr/Midwife says you don't need an IV (etc..), then you don't have to have one. Period. Was your Dr in agreement with your desires and Birth plan? If not, are their any other providers you could use for backup? I'm sorry you feel so out of control. It saddens me that moms have to fight so hard simply to birth in peace! ((Hugs)) mama. Try not to stress too much. Take it easy and keep that baby baking! but know that in the end, everything happens for a reason. I wish I had more to offer!!
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  #3  
April 9th, 2013, 12:42 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2011
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Is there someone you could have with you to help you fight for what you want? That's what I'm doing this time. I have to have a hospital birth because I was unable to get a midwife so besides DH, I am bringing a friend along to be an advocate (she's attended my last 3 births so she knows what I want). That way I don't have to focus so much on fighting for myself.
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  #4  
April 12th, 2013, 12:50 PM
alittlelost's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 6,904
Quote:
Originally Posted by GranolaMama View Post
Is it your care provider or your hospital? If your Dr/Midwife says you don't need an IV (etc..), then you don't have to have one. Period. Was your Dr in agreement with your desires and Birth plan? If not, are their any other providers you could use for backup? I'm sorry you feel so out of control. It saddens me that moms have to fight so hard simply to birth in peace! ((Hugs)) mama. Try not to stress too much. Take it easy and keep that baby baking! but know that in the end, everything happens for a reason. I wish I had more to offer!!
My first two pregnancies were with "midwives" that were really just mini OBs. but they knew my birth plan and approved of it. the HOSPITAL would NOT leave me alone, though. I knew I had the right to refuse it, but they just would NOT stop bugging me about it. Hopefully this won't come up--I feel good about making it to "term" this pregnancy, like my last pregnancy, though some days I get cramping and then I start worrying all over again. I DO NOT want to have this baby in a hospital. But more than that, I don't want to be unprepared if I do have to. As long as I make it to 36 weeks, my REAL midwives (not mini OB, but the one I used my last pregnancy) will let me use the birth center. I think if I ended up in the hospital they would support my birth choices with more advocacy than my last midwives, but I'll have to ask if they would be there with me the whole time if I end up in the hospital for any reason. I'll ask that at my next appt.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 4 boys View Post
Is there someone you could have with you to help you fight for what you want? That's what I'm doing this time. I have to have a hospital birth because I was unable to get a midwife so besides DH, I am bringing a friend along to be an advocate (she's attended my last 3 births so she knows what I want). That way I don't have to focus so much on fighting for myself.
That was useless last time I tried I suppose I could hire a doula, but the thing is I only need on IF I have the baby in the hospital. I really can't afford $800 for doula right now, either, so paying for one I might not need . . . I just can't bring myself to do it. No friends/family in the area, and DH sucks at the job, plus I need him there for ME not for talking to doctors that don't respect my wishes.
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