I miscarried

latestartTTC · #1 August 27th, 2011, 09:21 PM

Hello,

I just wanted to tell you guys I'll be rejoining you. I lost my baby this week at 6 weeks. I know you guys didn't know me very long, so I'll re-introduce myself a little. My DH of 14 yrs and I just started trying (FINALLY) to concieve at 36 (me) and 35 (DH). We were very lucky and got a BFP on our first cycle.
I'm still bleeding and cramping. It started Thursday and I had a trip to the ER today because of the pain. Everything was okay, but I had to have another ultrasound and round of bloodwork. Dr gave me an rx for pain though and sent me home.
I am interested in your thoughts about how long we should wait. My OB said 2 normal cycles. That just seems like forever to me. I saw by reading some other posts that your drs had said you could try again right away. I don't want to put myself at more risk for another m/c, but the experts don't seem to agree here, and based on today's tests, there's nothing about my m/c that is unusual so far. I go back to the dr on thursday where I'm sure they will check to make sure everything is gone from the pregnancy.

Thanks and I'm looking forward to getting reacquainted!
Hannah

pepper73 · #2 August 28th, 2011, 05:59 AM

Oh no!! I am so sorry!! That is such heartbreaking news!

When I had my loss (also at 6 weeks) my doctor advised me to wait 3 months. I refused to wait that long and just waited until after I got my post-m/c AF. From everything I have learned, unless there is a valid medical reason why your doctor wants you to wait, there's no reason why you should as long as you're emotionally ready. A lot of doctors want you to wait until after your first AF...because of dating purposes. If you are charting your cycles and know exactly when you ovulated, though, that wouldn't make a difference. I think what it really comes down to is to start again when you feel you are ready. Everything I have read has shown that there's generally no higher risk of a m/c if you get pregnant again right away.

Again, I'm so sorry for your loss. We are all here for you to support you!

GG1995 · #3 August 28th, 2011, 11:12 AM

Hannah,

I am so sorry for your loss. You and I found out about the same time that we were pregnant................I think it was actually a few days apart. I found out I was pregnant on August 8 and I had a miscarriage on August 13. When I saw my doctor, he told me that I only had to wait until my normal AF started to TTC again.......so technically, 1 cycle. I know what you mean about the timing thing..............even 1 cycle seems like an eternity.

Please know that we are all here for you! Hang in there sweetie!

Dara

latestartTTC · #4 August 28th, 2011, 02:39 PM

Hey guys.

Thanks for the feedback. Dara I remember how close we were. We found out almost the same time. I got my positive on Aug 10. Miscarried on Aug 25.

I appreciate both of you for letting me know your experiences. I go back for a recheck on Thursday. I am going to question the dr more on the waiting thing.

I appreciate the support so much.

Ever · #5 August 28th, 2011, 07:52 PM

Aw Hannah, I'm so very sorry. Good luck on Thursday and when you're ready to try again I hope it happens soon. KUP! We're here for you!

BeckyM · #6 August 29th, 2011, 05:02 AM

Hannah, I'm so sorry sweetie.

*SamF* · #7 August 29th, 2011, 06:13 AM

Hannah- I'm so sorry! I missed this over the weekend.

Since you are m/c naturally and it's early there is no medical reason to wait. Most doctors say 2-3 cycles for dating purposes and emotional healing time. But getting right back into TTC is better for me emotionally than sitting around waiting. Wait or don't wait based on how you are feeling. It's not like your doctor is going to tell you that you can't be pregnant if you get pregnant sooner.

latestartTTC · #8 August 29th, 2011, 04:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *SamF*

It's not like your doctor is going to tell you that you can't be pregnant if you get pregnant sooner.

I know but if there was a real medical reason, I didn't want to risk putting us through another heartbreak. Plus DH heard the dr say this so I will have to convince him that it's safe. Hopefully the dr will explain more to us on Thursday.

I get waiting for one full cycle for dating purposes. I don't want there to be a ton of questions/doubts on my ovulation date and due date for my entire pregnancy, if I can avoid it.

When they told me the development of the pregnancy on the u/s, I knew right away. I had zero doubts on my timing, so it was impossible that I was earlier than I thought I was. DH worked an opposite schedule to me right after my approximate O-Date, so, I knew the "DAY" LOL. There was no way I was earlier than I thought. That's my personality though, LOL. If there's any doubt, I am likely to second guess the dr and drive us all insane.

I appreciate the insight. It makes me so sad for your losses. All of you that have experienced this so many times, I cannot imagine it. :'( hugs...

Mom 2 Avery · #9 August 29th, 2011, 06:49 PM

Fingers crossed for some answers Thursday!

GG1995 · #10 August 30th, 2011, 08:01 AM

My doctor told me that he could not tell me "why" or give a any medical reason. He told me that 1 in 3 pregnancies end in a miscarriage. I was just 1 out of the 3 this time. He told me that they did not start looking into "medical" reasons for miscarriages until a woman has had at least 3. I could not imagine having to have 3 losses before they would start trying to find out what was going on. He also told me that my next pregnancy could be completely normal and healthy.........so that's what I am praying for.

*SamF* · #11 August 30th, 2011, 08:03 AM

Hoping he can ease your mind a bit on Thursday!

Jen71 · #12 September 2nd, 2011, 12:27 AM

I'm so sorry for your loss!!!
I was told to wait one cycle for dating purposes and to allow my body to "regroup", with medical studies indicating a significance for "unfavorable outcomes" more frequently for those who did not wait at least one full cycle. The uterus lining, they say, needs to rebuild.

latestartTTC · #13 September 8th, 2011, 10:29 PM

Hi guys. So Sorry for the delay in an update. I saw dr last thurs and then dh slipped off for a short vacation. She insisted 2 normal cycles. Reason was to clean out my uterus and rebuild the lining. She is in the same group as my regular gyn but a diff dr. I'm debating about asking my dr for her opinion as well. Just anxious is all.

missy123 · #14 September 9th, 2011, 08:12 AM

I am so sorry for your loss

I am 42 and had 4 miscarriages in the 2.5 years we were TTC. It was an extremely heartbreaking journey.

My doctors all said to wait until AF shows (1 cycle) and then I could try again. Even with my cervical ectopic they did not see a reason to try right away. ((hugs)) I am so very sorry.

MarieJ · #15 September 9th, 2011, 02:49 PM

I am so sorry for your loss

Pajama Mama · #16 September 9th, 2011, 07:02 PM

I am so sorry for your loss. It is one of the most difficult things to experience. I do hope you are feeling better.

latestartTTC · #17 September 10th, 2011, 02:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pajama Mama

I am so sorry for your loss. It is one of the most difficult things to experience. I do hope you are feeling better.

Thanks. I do feel much better aside from the 10lbs I've packed on. I need to get back on the wagon again with diet and exercise. Just ready to drop this weight and ttc again asap!

Thanks to everyone for the information and support!

mom2pne · #18 September 13th, 2011, 12:22 PM

I'm sorry for your loss! Mostly why doctors say wait 2 or 3 cycles is so you can get some emotional healing before you start trying again and another reason is to make it easier to predict your babies due date. If you were to try right away you may ovulate, but it may happen later than you normally would and so the baby would be smaller than it would be when using your lmp date.

I've had 3 m/c's and do understand the need to try right away!

JessicaW · #19 September 13th, 2011, 01:07 PM

Hannah, heart-breaking news! I'm so sorry. Hopefully since you got pregnant on your first cycle trying, you will get pregnant quickly again. And like some of the other posters said, I believe the chances are very good that your next bean will be sticky.

Baby Development · #20 September 29th, 2011, 09:24 AM

It brought tears to my eyes when I read your post. I am so sorry for your loss. I suffered a miscarriage at 8 weeks and it was one of the most difficult things I have gone through.

I was 44 at the time and my RE told me that they usually wait for 2 cycles, but due to my age, I could try again as soon as I got my period. The nurses also told me that a silver lining is that many women are more fertile after a miscarriage. It was true for me because I got pregnant the next cycle (IUI) and now have a baby girl. You can read more about some of my key learnings at pregnancyover40now

Blessings to you!

Deborah