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  #121  
March 16th, 2014, 01:27 AM
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Paula and Rae, both of your charts are looking amazing!! Praying you both get you BFP.

Paula happy to hear you had a great time at your retreat. How is DH? Did he get out out of the hospital?


Pamela HUGS! Sorry DH is being difficult right now. Hopefully he apologized to you or he does it soon and means it.


This morning was.another bust but FINALLY this evening he was able to finish the job. He is having issue of not being able to get to that get to the point of no return . Seriously it's so bad that he can't even masterbate. I don't even own soft cups. My IC and CB OPI's are still positive, so we have ourselves a slim chance this cycle.


I've had so much EWCM this cycle, combine all the rest of my past cycles and this month I've had even more.


OK I stated dozing off while I was writing. Must go to bed...Nite
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  #122  
March 16th, 2014, 05:02 AM
ctymom's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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DH pretty much thinks the arguments are old news and to get over it. Easy for him when it's me that got dumped on. He said alot of hurtful things to me and I'm supposed to just 'get over it'. I dont see how that is possible. It's maddening b/c he said the things he said were just comments, he didnt mean anything by them, they are facts. *um what??* He says he is supportive of me about not wanting to go to events where girls are put on display but throws it in my face and says b/c of me and my 'stupid issues' we cant do this, that or the other thing and I'm holding him back. (I could have died from Anorexia Nervosa....I've only really been in recovery the past 2 years. Relapse is VERY common and I'm fighting hard with it.) Sooooo we dont do that stuff, you understand, BUT you are now throwing it my face but that's ok b/c it's just a fact, not meant to make me feel bad. OK....does that make sense to any of you? Am I missing something?

There are other issues that were fought about but too long to bore you with. I dont even want to deal with today.
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Last edited by ctymom; March 16th, 2014 at 05:06 AM.
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  #123  
March 16th, 2014, 08:23 AM
Shelz@_@
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oh Pam hunnie Im sorry I have been there where you are different things but still recover is hard. I got sick from what we now know was my gullblatter and almost died cause of it throwing up all the time in pain panic attacks and so on all I would eat was jello and watermellon and went from a healthy 120 to 89 pounds there was just nothing left. that being said I wont get into everything but my point is this I was afraid of food and got a phobiea of eating until after moved and finally found what was wrong it took me years to learn how to eat again and I still freak out over food.. men are jerks they thinks its easy but its not they always say get over it or it in your head well guess what its not.so just so you know I got your back cause I know.. Im not trying to steal your thunder but just here for support we do understand.. love ya and god bless.
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  #124  
March 16th, 2014, 08:48 AM
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Pamela, perhaps he just doesn't understand how serious Anorexia is. I might tell him he could go without you. {{{hugs}}} Renee, fantastic on a successful bd!!

Shelia, I'm glad you have peace. I'm done after a couple more Femara cycles myself.
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  #125  
March 16th, 2014, 09:03 AM
ctymom's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Thank you...it's nice to hear when someone understands. I've come a LONG way with the Anorexia and even have eaten alot of major fear foods. I can't go to functions, car shows where girls are on display. It's unhealthy for me and I thought he understood that. And what he doesnt get is... understanding it doesnt mean you throw it in my face. That's not understanding. I dont know how to get him to see that. I'm sad and frustrated today and he thinks I should be over it because 'that was yesterday'. Well... you believe what you said and what you said could change alot of things about our relationship. How am I supposed to just drop it? I tend to focus on my weight and food when I cant control anything in my life. And it's getting that way again. thank you so much for listening..I appreciate it
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  #126  
March 16th, 2014, 11:35 AM
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Pamela having an eating disorder never fully goes away. I had it bad starting in my early teens into my late 20's. It never fully goes away. Hugs!

Rae I'm really excited about this cycle for you. I can't wait to hear about your BFP!


Sheila I understand why you would want to delete your account, but you will be missed not being here. At least there is still FB. Sorry your TTC journey had been so long for you. I can hardly stand the 12 cycles I've had to endure and can't imagine TTC as ling as you. Hugs!!!


I'm happy DH has been able to perform, but I'm pretty sure we completely missed my fertile window. This morning OPK's were negative, but we DTD.
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  #127  
March 16th, 2014, 01:53 PM
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Hmm maybe that egg hung around long enough?

Pamela, Renne is right they never go away. Just talk about if you need to. Why can't he go by himself if it's that important to him?
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  #128  
March 16th, 2014, 03:52 PM
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Rae if ever there was a month that the environment was right for sperm, this was the month. I have had so much EWCM and watery CM. He's finally getting his libido back but of course it is after I've ovulated. I'm not as frustrated or down as I was the other night. I'm also making him call his Dr and having them figure out another alternative. Every few months it seem to happen.

Pamela anytime you need to vent let it, we're here for you. I always encourage DH he needs more male bonding time. Although he usually does it right in my fertile window.


I've been cleaning off and on all day and I have come to the conclusion we have way too much crap. Seriously stupid crap, kids menu from resturants, a paper with one word written on it, boxes galore from Amazon. I just took the Christmas wreath down today and put the Easter on on the door. The Easter wreath has been out since last Easter. We also have 4 boxes that haven't been opened since 2006 when we moved from WA to CA, CA back to WA. We have no clue what are actually packed in them. I swear we are a mini version of Horder's. I'm pretty sure there is Christmas presents that were opened but never played with yet. Must go back down and start cleaning.
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  #129  
March 16th, 2014, 04:27 PM
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Renee, you make me feel better about my junk!!
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  #130  
March 16th, 2014, 08:00 PM
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Glad I can make you feel better Rae. DH is at the point where he wants a house keeper. I suck at being a SAHM, but to my defense I spend a lot of time at my children's school, I may as well get a job there.

Spring is right around the corner! I can hardly contain my excitement!
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  #131  
March 16th, 2014, 10:37 PM
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I know I will be missed and Im so grateful for everyone and all the friends I have made.. I hope you all end up with your bfp.sooner than later.. I wont be on anymore after tomorrow night.. many blessings to you all.. will be in touch on fb..and if any of you me to add you please PM your info I have mine blocked.
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  #132  
March 17th, 2014, 12:39 AM
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sad face Sheila, but we all understand needing to move on. Is the snow starting to thaw in Alaska?
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  #133  
March 17th, 2014, 04:01 AM
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Hi ladies im still about .said I was done but its hard to be done when I know when im oing when I know when its the witch time !! So not been temping or testing but still on the quite hoping if you know what I mean .any ways wrote a post lol .I hate giving up im as stubborn as a mule lol
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  #134  
March 17th, 2014, 05:10 AM
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Renee....we still have the Christmas decorations and tree in the hallway waiting for DH to put them all away. I took everything down and boxed it and he was supposed to put it all away. Soooo, there it all sits.

sheila..... I understand completely. Hopefully you'll be one of many that 'throw in the towel' and then the next month they get their bfp! That would be awesome Sending out my thoughts and prayers and will see you around Facebook.

Vicky..... welcome back! I know what you mean about being stubborn. When I have someone on my mind, I have a hard time dropping it. It becomes a mission in life.

asf... we went over some friends house for a cookout last night and saw their newborn baby again. Such a little bean and so cute. My babies were never that little. lol Again, trying so hard not to think I'm feeling symptoms but i swear it feels like my nips are on fire. I've been getting very sharp pains in them since last night. My BBs seem to be sensitive in general for AF every month, but this was feeling like they were on fire. Probably nothing and my body messing with me.

asf me and DH..... he seems over it but down deep I'm still feeling really hurt. I dont get over things very easily thanks to PSTD and will more than likely talk to him about how I feel today b/c it's stressing me out holding it all in. But not sure how to get him to get it and understand what I'm saying. He's being dense.
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  #135  
March 17th, 2014, 05:52 AM
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Pamela I hope the talk goes well. That's usually better than holding on to it. Shelia, we will miss you but I do understand. I laid in bed lastnight and thought I don't know if I can do this anymore. Do I even still want this? Now I'm wondering if my spotting is due to low Estrogen which would make sense due to my age. I'm just so tired of stressing about everything that might be wrong with my body or eggs.
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  #136  
March 17th, 2014, 08:27 AM
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Pamela hoping your talk with DH helps and he realizes what he says effects you. Maybe write it out just so you know what you want to say. I tend to get over emotional and off track when that happens.Ice your boobs. I still have the ice packs from when I had my kids, I never had to use them, but again I'm a pack rat.


Rae I have felt the same way but I haven't experienced enough frustration to give up. Can anything naturally or prescribed by Dr to increase Estrogen level?


Vicky glad to have you back.


Nothing going on with me. DH was in a foul mood this morning and woke me up around 4:40. Can I hang him by his toes? The kids got up without having to tell them over and over, so I have that this morning. I'm pretty sure I am 1 DPO but just waiting for FF to confirm.
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  #137  
March 17th, 2014, 03:16 PM
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Renee, you may hang your husband by his toes. I give you permission
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  #138  
March 17th, 2014, 05:06 PM
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Sheila--genuinely sad to see you leave. From what you've said, it has been a really hard road for you and it's quite understandable wanting to put it behind you. Like Pam, I hope that you come back someday just to tell us that "it" just happened. I'm not on facebook anymore, so I suppose this is goodbye. I wish you well, friend. If you ever change your mind, we're here for you.


Renee--Hang him from his toes...then blame it on PMS!

Vicky--welcome back!

Rhani--how are you feeling? when are you testing, I forgot?

Pam--good luck with the talk...sometimes men to have something told to them a 100 times before they get it!...As for the tatas, I keep hearing that song "Ice, Ice Booby"...lol...sorry, I'm easily entertained!

Rae--I still have faith in you this cycle!!! If, however, I'm completely wrong, my sister was prescribed a combination of progesterone and estradiol when she was ttc...just a thought!

AFM--just hanging out in the 2ww...trying not to overanalyze symptoms--so far, so good with that! If AF doesn't show up, I'll be testing either Sat or Sun...we'll see
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Paula 42
DH--43 (no bio kids)
DS1--23 DS2--21
1/30/14 at 7 weeks 2 days

You know my deep desire for a child. A little one to love and to hold, to care for,
to cherish. Grant that my body may conceive and give birth to a beautiful, healthy baby in Your holy image.
Guide me in all my choices so that this conception, my pregnancy and my baby's birth are in line with Your will. Heavenly Father and Holy Mother, hear this prayer of my heart, mind and spirit.
Amen.



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  #139  
March 17th, 2014, 05:13 PM
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Paula, perhaps I need to look into that.
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  #140  
March 18th, 2014, 06:20 AM
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Rae--I'll ask her how it worked. I'm pretty sure she took the estradiol throughout her cycle and started taking the progesterone after she O'd until she saw AF. When she got pregnant with my niece she continued the progesterone until the 12th week, when the placenta took over. I think she stopped the estradiol when she got her BFP, but I'd have to ask her.

AFM-- Today, I'm off work and happy to be! I try not to focus on ttc, but when I'm at work it is nearly impossible. I work in the OR and there are certain surgeries that I can't go in IF I'm pregnant. I basically have to avoid rooms that use X-Ray and then certain ones that involve cement use because they are all high risk for fetal defects or m/c. I spend my day at work calling on friends to switch cases/rooms with me. Most of my colleagues know I'm ttc, you just can't hide it where I work--it's nearly impossible. My age isn't a huge factor, a lot of them have started late in life just because of how long it takes to get through school and start practicing. But, the fact that I have 2 much older children makes a lot of them smile and say "I think you're nuts!." Even so, they are mostly supportive of this endeavor, I just hate asking to trade all the time. I feel like a slacker! Not to mention that I am starting to get asked "so, how are things going."...and I know what they really want to know is if I'm pregnant yet. I am looking forward to (cautiously) telling them I'm pregnant again. I suppose this is how my unmarried friend feels when people keep asking her if she's engaged yet to her long time BF...talk about pressure to produce! Anyhow, I'm glad I'm off today...and really glad to be off on Friday as well. I just have to get through tomorrow and Wednesday....then either I can tell them I'm preggers or I can quit changing rooms again until the next time I ovulate, lol! Thanks for letting me rant...these are the things I didn't think about before we decided to ttc...today I'm just glad to be sitting in my easy chair sipping my coffee and surfing the net in my PJ's....
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Paula 42
DH--43 (no bio kids)
DS1--23 DS2--21
1/30/14 at 7 weeks 2 days

You know my deep desire for a child. A little one to love and to hold, to care for,
to cherish. Grant that my body may conceive and give birth to a beautiful, healthy baby in Your holy image.
Guide me in all my choices so that this conception, my pregnancy and my baby's birth are in line with Your will. Heavenly Father and Holy Mother, hear this prayer of my heart, mind and spirit.
Amen.



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