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6 months ago... And getting frustrated.


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  #1  
October 24th, 2008, 07:35 PM
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Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Hayden, ID
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Ok I am new to this forum but my sister turned me on to this site.

In April I had a miscarriage. Even though it was a short period of time between me finding out I was pregnant and then having the miscarriage It still hit me really hard for a few reasons...

1. This was the first time I had ever been pregnant.
2. Me and my husband were extreemly excited.
3. My sister was due a couple days after I was supposed to be...

So I am having a really hard time with her being pregnant. Not that I'm not happy for her. It just is... Really hard. She has 2 BEAUTIFUL kids already who I adore and was super happy for her each pregnancy... This time around I am more heartbroken. Especially because she is having a boy ( Thats what we were hoping we were having ALTHOUGH either way we would have been happy) AND she is using the name that I have loved ever since I can remember ( Although my hubby hates the name and we wouldn't have ended up using it because of that... Is it wrong to be mad about it?) so that makes it even harder...

We have been trying ever since the miscarriage to get pregnant. We are not trying TOO hard or anything. I have even tried recording my Ovulation and that just stressed me out more... So now I am almost to that point where I feel like something is wrong with me because I'm not getting pregnant.

I feel like I am broken because everytime I turn my head another of my friends or family members is pregnant who either were not trying or didn't want to get pregnant. So Again I feel like something is wrong with me when I am sitting her begging to get pregnant again and everytime I turn my head people I know are either having babies they dont want or Getting Abortions.

And I am also having a hard time because I cried for a couple months after I had the miscarriage and for those months I also couldn't be around anyones baby without getting depressed and feeling even worse. I'm better now although there are times when people I know who dont even want to be moms keep accidentally getting pregnant that I cant be around their babies.

Also I felt like my crying even that many months after the miscarriage was normal. Although people kept telling me I just needed to toughen up and get over it because my pregnacy wasn't even that long... And then there are others who make me feel bad that I am already trying again.

I dont know what to think....
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  #2  
October 24th, 2008, 08:18 PM
L-SBB's Avatar Bébé Cowgirl
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Texas
Posts: 9,810
Welcome Zerpos - first let me say I'm really sorry for your loss. I recently suffered a miscarriage at 9w2d, which was my first pregnancy as well, and I think regardless of how short a period of time you were pregnant the loss of your hopes and your dreams for that baby is a terrible thing to suffer through. Your grieving period is not governed by other people's expectations, and you have every right to still have grief over your loss (i feel like kicking the person who told you to "toughen up"!).

I'd recommend you repost again in the main page for the Pregnancy Loss board (you posted in a sub-folder) so you get more responses. The women on this board are very supportive and have been very helpful to me as I've been working through my grief - what brings you to this board is very sad, but everyone will be glad to have you join us.

L.
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  #3  
October 24th, 2008, 08:19 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 26,393
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First off

I know how you feel. I had a m/c in april as well, my second in 2.5 years. We were preventing, but I would have been happy with being pregnant. But at 8 weeks my period came on and I m/c my little girl.

Nothing will bring you comfort, but just know we are here for you if you need us, at any time!
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