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Friday, October 12th was a horrible day for my family. That was the day we found out that our sweet little baby had died in utero. There was no warning that anything bad had happened.
We went to the doctor's appointment, and the doctor tried finding the baby's heartbeat TWICE with the doppler, but she couldn't find it. So she sent me down to have an ultrasound done, to make sure everything was okay. The ultrasound technician saw on the screen that the baby was measuring six weeks and had no heartbeat. Apparently the baby had died soon after we found out that we were expecting, but since I didn't have any bleeding or cramping, we had no knowledge of this.
I started bleeding on Saturday. It wasn't bad, no cramping or anything. I thought it would be easier than my first miscarriage. Then, Sunday I started bleeding a LOT more and cramping really bad. My water broke Sunday night. I took a shower, since I didn't want to take a bath, with all of the blood coming out. The shower ended up being 2 hours long because, every time I tried to get out, I started gushing more blood. I was so glad that Nate was home to watch Ian and help me when I couldn't stand it anymore.
I'm doing a lot better now. . .I can at least talk about the baby without bursting into tears. I'm not sure if I ever want to try to conceive another baby. . .I can't bear to go through yet another miscarriage. Nate said that I shouldn't even think about that now--not while I'm grieving the loss of our little angel.