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Getting nervous...


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  #1  
July 21st, 2006, 08:11 AM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Ok, we decided to give ttc to God, so we're providing the opportunity and letting God take it from there. Well, I'm on CD16 today (usually a 28 day cycler, first AF after loss was 35 days) and we've BD'd every other day so far this cycle. The last couple of days, I've had strong twinges about where my left ovary is. My appetite is ramping up (DH has incredible metabolism that I get almost immediately when pg) and this morning when our kitten came in with the end of his tail bleeding, I got incredibly nauseus and had to put my head between my knees. This may be absolutely nothing or we may have succeeded, so now I'm getting nervous. Not sure really what the point of this post is other than to vent my nervousness to others who understand.

(As for our kitten, he's 8 months old and climbs on everything! We have no idea what he did to himself, but it's just the tip of his tail, he wasn't crying, and it didn't stop him from climbing on two pieces of furniture and falling 2 more times while we were trying to see what happened. He's a clutz and is OK!)
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  #2  
July 21st, 2006, 03:04 PM
beck12's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I hava a clutzy kitty too - but he's 7 now & he never got any better. Sorry to tell ya if you're hoping he'll improve with age.

It's so hard all hte TTC - symptoms..etc. It is truly impossible to know because as soon as you are TTC - you become uber aware of everything - so things you would otherwise pass off as no big whoop - suddeny cause you to wonder. Hang in there - as long as it feels you wait to have an answer as to whether it happened this month or not - it's not actually all that long - try not to think about it too much - I don't think it will help your nerves any. How do you not think about it? Good question - I don't have the answer on that one yet.
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  #3  
July 22nd, 2006, 11:19 AM
srs srs is offline
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Vent away! I totally understand where you're coming from, and I'll definitely be here to listen anytime you need to unload some concerns.
Personally I'm in denial mode about the whole thing, although I was pleasantly surprised to find that I was a (small) bit excited about the possibility of another pg. After my first mc, I tried my best to follow all the dr.'s instructions, and I worried that the pg was a fluke, and we would have trouble getting pg again. This time, I have thrown all caution to the wind, completely ignored the doc, and am not worried in the least about not being able to conceive, just about carrying to term. And yes, I think at least a part of this is complete mental illness due to depression, but I really don't care. We shall see what happens.

About your kitten: I wish I had one, but I am really allergic (like the can't breathe and break out in hives kind of allergic), so I have to content myself with watching the neighbors' cats. It's really too bad - I would like a klutzy kitty too!
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  #4  
July 22nd, 2006, 05:44 PM
beck12's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
About your kitten: I wish I had one, but I am really allergic (like the can't breathe and break out in hives kind of allergic), so I have to content myself with watching the neighbors' cats. It's really too bad - I would like a klutzy kitty too! [/b]
There is supposedly a new hypoallergenice cat - but it's pricey like $3,000.00

Maybe someday it will be more accessible...I hope.

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/20...rgies-cats.html
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B - Crazy momma to my two boys
We've begun to raise daughters more like sons... but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters. ~Gloria Steinem

If a man has been his mother's undisputed darling he retains throughout life the triumphant feeling, the confidence in success, which not seldom brings actual success along with it. ~Sigmund Freud
My mom is a neverending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune. ~Graycie Harmon
Don't wait to make your son a great man - make him a great boy. ~Author Unknown
You don't raise heroes, you raise sons. And if you treat them like sons, they'll turn out to be heroes, even if it's just in your own eyes. ~Walter M. Schirra, Sr.
A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest. ~Irish Proverb
Mother's love is peace. It need not be acquired, it need not be deserved. ~Erich Fromm
Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it. - Harold Hulbert
Mother is the name for God in the lips and hearts of little children. ~William Makepeace Thackeray
God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers. ~Jewish Proverb
The best conversations with mothers always take place in silence, when only the heart speaks. ~Carrie Latet




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  #5  
July 24th, 2006, 05:58 PM
srs srs is offline
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That cat thing is crazy! Science is amazing. I have to say, it doesn't quite seem fair to the cat to go to all that trouble just because people can't handle their skin or whatever it is. But still, it would be nice to have a cat and be able to breathe...

But getting back to the original topic... I'm definitely back in the "noticing everything about my body because I might end up pg" mode. I have been crampy on and off since Thursday (and oddly, af ended on Wed). Although I've pretty much decided that my body no longer has a "normal", and if anything is happening it's ovulation, I still keep thinking "what if by some act of God I'm already pg again, even though af only ended 5 days ago?" Rather silly I suppose, but at least now I don't really have a whole lot of expectations associated with pg. Like I don't automatically expect a pg has anything to do with a live, full term baby anymore. If what we're doing can even be called ttc, I think it is a far cry from what the rest of JM talks about.

I just realized most of this doesn't make much sense, but I think I'll post it anyway and try to figure out what I meant later. Right now I am insanely tired (didn't sleep nearly enough last night), and I'm having a massive craving for ice cream, so I think I'll go deal with that.
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  #6  
July 25th, 2006, 07:30 AM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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It actually makes perfect sense, especially the 5 days post-af. After my first loss, it took no more than a week to start pg #2. So it's entirely possible (though that may not bring you any comfort...hmmm). Everything is a question anymore. What's my body doing? Why? When will I know something (O, BFP, etc)?

I'm doing pretty well so far taking it one step at a time. DH can't make up his mind and goes from teasing me with "I need to knock you up" (and he never talks like that!) to "I'm covering up because we can't afford another kid for a while". I think he's still emotional about everything and doesn't really know what to do. And I guess that's OK. He needs to heal, too, and I'm not in a rush to be pg again. I'm leaving that schedule in God's hands.

Back to the cat topic, they also have developed allergy shots for people severely allergic to cats. They're supposed to work really well, but I think they're still way expensive.
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  #7  
July 25th, 2006, 07:37 AM
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((((4Iris)))) Honey, I don't have anything to add that the other girls haven't said or won't say better than me. I just want you to know I'm keeping up with you and watching out for you and rooting for you all the way. Massive hugs and lots of positive thoughts for you.

As a side note, I think your DH is coping with his emotions just like a man - his varying comments are probably directly in line with his feelings on TTC - somedays he's ready to start over and go for it, and other days he's scared and still hurting.

Lots of love to all you ladies, and know that there are a lot of us out there rooting for you.
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  #8  
July 25th, 2006, 10:57 AM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Thanks, Deb! I check up on all of you in the DDC on a regular basis, but had no idea you were keeping up with me. That means more than you can imagine. Thank you!
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  #9  
July 25th, 2006, 12:16 PM
Deb's Avatar
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Glad you don't think it's some weird stalker-type behavior!
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  #10  
July 25th, 2006, 02:01 PM
4iris's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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LOL!! Never! Stalking on JM is a good thing.
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