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  #1  
April 21st, 2006, 06:47 AM
horses's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 458
guys look at porn whether online or not ...women on the streets walking etc.
married or not men.
why do they look at porn? I know some says it is variety and some says I am not blind and I'm not picking my eyes out and that the body is a beautiful thing and gods instrument....men/husbands and strip clubs don't do nothing for me I just go for the drinks and social.
got this this morning...I come home to you,I love you quit being so insecure.
when they do make love to you (the wife) do they have the pictures in their head or do they really make love to YOU?

I was always brought up that a man and women sees eachother naked not to the whole world.
I know my body ain't perfect..hell I had kids...just makes me feel like sh@@

when I know my hubby looks at porn even at work with other guys.

he asked me last night if I was to get a massage who would you want a man or a woman...I said women and he says now if I was to....I said does a gay man count and he said I ain't having him touch me then I said well he could massage me to...and he said I am not letting no other man touch you....
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  #2  
April 21st, 2006, 05:34 PM
Cyndee's Avatar Mommy to 3 tagalongs
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Texas
Posts: 9,947
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I personally don't care. Because I look too.. I even point out women I think are hot...

The reason why I think it bothers you... Is what bothered me for the longest time... Why does he have to look at other women?... Ain't I satisfying him.. Why doesn't he look at me that way?.. Is something wrong with me that he has to go looking at other women..?? I used to ask myself this all the time... I then realized it was a insecurity in myself.. Because the other women he looked at on the internet mimicked me.. The were short average build with brown hair and eyes and big chested.. Like me.. Then I realized maybe I need to quit being insecure about my body.. And since I have.. He hasn't looked at porn that much
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  #3  
April 22nd, 2006, 03:41 PM
asianmama
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i dont know what to say to u..never experienced it... my husband has porn on his computer but he NEVER looks at it since we been married. the only reason they were on his computer was because he was backing up files from a friends computer befor he started fixing it.. another thing my husband doesnt go out to strip clubs or bars.. he barely hangs out with 'the boys'

i only feel insecure when im pregnant or pmsing.. i can understand where ur husband is coming from. he doesnt want another man massaging u because its 'his job" and its not like going to the strip clubs and what not, because he doesnt touch the stripers or the porn stars, while a masused(sp) is body body contact..
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  #4  
April 25th, 2006, 10:02 AM
Sassy5d's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 1,545
Part of it could be cultural conditioning.. Or sterotyping......

"Manly Men"-Look at pornos, dirty mags, have naked girls hanging in the garage.. Go to strip clubs..

Why do some of them go? Because they can.. Because it's acceptable for a man to do that.. Married or not.
Think about this... If a male says that he's an exotic dancer, or a stripper or a chippendale.. It's fine right?
Now.. What thought cross's alot of peoples minds when a girl says she's an exotic dancer, or a stripper or a burlesque dancer? Totally different attitudes right?

I used to have a very big problem with all of this.. And it really bothered me when it appeared to me that those things were the objects of his attention (ex) I used to get floored when he'd go to a strip club and pay 40-50 bucks for shower dances or what have you.. I kept thinking.. Hey buddy, Pay me 40-50 dollars and I'll do a whole lot more then just dance around..

I think this would be a fabulous question to ask on the daddy lounge board.. And hopefully you'll get mens answers and not a bunch of womens (that happens for some odd reason.. a daddy haven and the women are answering the questions)

I've heard from several different guys that it's a fantasy... especially the porns.. They imagine that THEY are the dudes in the videos.. Men are programed to "hump" ( )
I know cosmo isn't the most reliable sources but I read a good article in there a few years back.. They had 3 different men from 3 different walks of life, older, younger single married kids no kids ect..
And they had them write down the time and what was going on every time they thought about sex.. And honestly.. When they say men think about sex just about constantly, they aren't kidding...

Anything and everything got those men thinking sex... A man saw a woman get on the subway with wet hair and he was day dreaming of her being naked sudsing in the shower.. simply b/c her hair was wet...

I think communication is a big thing here.. and I know it can cause alot of problems in a relationship...

I for the longest time considered it cheating.. Why? Well b/c I felt that seeing someone completely naked, especially strip clubs.. was not a cool thing when you were involved with someone...
How is it any different then if I went next door and watched my male neighbor undress in front of me.. Somebody wouldn't appreciate that...

Maybe you need to visit a strip club yourself.. or check out a porn.. or go adult store shopping with or without him.. Or maybe you need to just be open and honest with him and tell him how it makes you feel...

Only you know what will work for you!
Good Luck!
Becky
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