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  #1  
August 12th, 2008, 07:28 AM
08baby's Avatar Veteran
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Hey everyone ! I am new to this part of the board and just wanted to let you knwo what's going on ... My MIL is a big old pain in the butt at first she was nice and I loved her , however when Dh deployed she was nice at first intill I asked her not to smoke in front of my son then she went nut's on me and basically thing's have not been the same I had alot of trouble my husband deployment last time and she told my husband I was a lazy ##### I act nice to her but really can't stand her and dh is set to deploy once again and I have no friend's here to talk to and I just don't want to turn to her She also show's my husband's ex-girlfriends picture's of our kids even though I hate these girl's and she give's out his number any advice
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  #2  
August 12th, 2008, 09:23 AM
(.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.)
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She also show's my husband's ex-girlfriends picture's of our kids even though I hate these girl's and she give's out his number any advice?[/b]
Wow. That's so disrespectful to you, your dh, your kids, and your marriage. I really believe in marriage and I find it so disgraceful of your mil to be doing that. To me, in-laws are suppose to help support their children and grandchildren ~ especially in times of crisis. Having your dh deployed should be a time to rally together. I'm so sorry your MIL isn't being a support in your marriage. I would like to thank you, your kids and your husband for your sacrifice to help protect your country.

I'm newer here and trying to be a better person about the situation with my MIL. I know I can only control myself when it comes to being around her. I feel my MIL is abusive to her children (my dh and BIL.) I can't make her change and I can't expect her to treat me any better if she can't treat her own with love, empathy and compassion.
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  #3  
August 12th, 2008, 09:52 AM
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Thank's for the welcome Your MIL is abusive to her own children ? I really don't get why so many woman have problems with the MIL"S I swear mine think's she is dating my husband !!! She crazy psyco over him
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  #4  
August 12th, 2008, 05:43 PM
SamuelsMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Hi and welcome to the board! I'm Stephanne the co-host here.

Wow she really is a piece of work! I can't believe that she would have contact with your DH's exes let alone show them pictures of your kids or give out his number! That is crazy disrespectful. She should be supporting your marriage not trying to rip it apart. You have every right to tell her not to smoke around your children. I wouldn't tolerate it around my children even from their grandparents. There is no one that will put my children's health at risk and that's what she was doing. You would think that even if she doesn't care about her own health, she would love and care about her grandchildren enough not to expose them to something proven to be as harmful as secondhand smoke! It's unthinkable! I hope you stick around and hang out with us. Hugs!
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  #5  
August 12th, 2008, 09:00 PM
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Hi there, I'm Yoshie! It is very disrespectful to smoke around your kids after you have politely asked her not to. My mom sometimes forgets but she doesn't spazz out if you remind her. The best idea is for you to walk out. or Move the kids away from her when she smokes. She might pick up the hint. As for the ex's thing. I don't know what do about that. That's crazy! Good luck there.

Welcome to the message board I hope you stay around. We're all here to vent and help!
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  #6  
August 13th, 2008, 06:07 AM
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Thanks !! The thing that make's me so upset is we don't smoke so why would it be ok for her to smoke in our house near our kids? See has also cussed me out a few time's , I just hope this deployment I can be nice to her but make sure she know's I don't want her down here when dh leave's . So do you all have crazy in-law's ?
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  #7  
August 13th, 2008, 08:35 AM
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If I were you, I'd stop letting her over to your house until she shapes up. She is disrespectful not only to you, but your DH and your kids. Make house rules. If she can't abide by them, kick her out until she can.

My ILs are crazy, but DH & I had to kick them out of our lives completely. It's a long story, but it had to be done. They couldn't respect us at all. We tried and tried, but they were stubborn and hateful. So, we had to say goodbye. We don't live anywhere near them though, so we're very lucky. They are in Illinois and we're in Nevada.

I wish you luck and I hope you and your DH don't have to come down to what we had to do. It sucked, but hey... why let people try to walk all over us? We had to show them that we were serious.

I'd set up the house rules first and see how that works out. Good luck!
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  #8  
August 13th, 2008, 07:58 PM
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I'm fairly sure my inlaws are certifiably insane. I'm still waiting on the paperwork to prove it though If it's your house then DEFINATLY tell your MIL to back off and cut out the smoking. allow her to smoke outside or something but not in your house and not around the kids. How hard is it to walk outside?
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  #9  
August 14th, 2008, 10:19 AM
SamuelsMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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My MIL is a complete nutcase, but I actually love my FIL. His worst fault is putting up with her crap a little more than he should, but he usually works pretty hard to keep her in check. I'd probably have to put up with her a lot more if it wasn't for him keeping her from coming too often or staying forever. While she is a selfish person and I think she may have a prescription drug addiction, she isn't a malicious person. She doesn't go out of her way to be mean or do things that are intended to hurt. I can put up with it in small doses but I'm so glad that they live clear across the country so I only have to see them 4 or 5 times a year.
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  #10  
August 15th, 2008, 09:37 AM
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She my MIL told my Dh I was lying and she never smoked in the house ... ok why would I make that up ? I really liked her there is no reason why I would do that . They live about 11 hour's from us so they don't come up to much , I do however know when dh deploys she plays me like a fiddle because I have no friends here and she know's deployment's suck I think Im going to pick up a hobby of some sort and chat alot on the boards .
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  #11  
August 15th, 2008, 09:37 AM
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She my MIL told my Dh I was lying and she never smoked in the house ... ok why would I make that up ? I really liked her there is no reason why I would do that . They live about 11 hour's from us so they don't come up to much , I do however know when dh deploys she plays me like a fiddle because I have no friends here and she know's deployment's suck I think Im going to pick up a hobby of some sort and chat alot on the boards .
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  #12  
August 19th, 2008, 08:01 AM
SamuelsMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Hugs! Why she would lie and say you were lying? Kind of ironic. Who will DH believe?
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  #13  
August 21st, 2008, 05:54 PM
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Because she's nuts and my dh know's thislol
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  #14  
August 22nd, 2008, 08:24 AM
SamuelsMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Well I'm glad that your DH sees her for what she is!
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