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mother in law insists on being in the room


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  #1  
October 26th, 2008, 02:57 PM
SarahMascara's Avatar Regular
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: memphis,tn
Posts: 97
really i cant be so mad about this because all i have to do is say no but as soon as we told my mother in law i was pregnant all she could talk about was how i have to make sure she can be in the room when im giving birth (not just the beginning oflabor the whole deal) and im thinkin gee lady ive met you TWICE and you really think im gonna feel comfortable with you staring at my vagina waiting for the baby to pop out? riiiight...
i dont even want my mom in there! at that point anyone in there chattering like some da*n hens while im trying to concentrate on having the baby will probably get things thrown at them and cussed out
i just dont understand it... then as soon as i have the baby everybodys gonna want to hold it and frankly id like to have some alone time,just me and the daddy, not in laws and grandparents and great grandparents arguing over who gets to hold the baby next like they did when my bro had his baby, HELL naw..
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  #2  
October 26th, 2008, 03:42 PM
SamuelsMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Indiana
Posts: 16,541
LOL Yeah, it's just getting around to saying "no." In fact, I'd let her son deal with her, but that's just me... I hope he's supportive of what you want. This is always a big problem but in your case saying no one is allowed makes it a little easier. Good luck!!
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  #3  
October 26th, 2008, 07:17 PM
mom2nate
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I felt EXACTLY the same as you do about it. I mean here you are having your new baby, you deserve some time with your husband alone to get to know it..you know? It's not such a weird thing to want. I had the same problem with my MIL and we just told her how it was going to be from day one. She may not have liked it but it's not her choice so either deal with or don't be involved any. And, it's super easy. All you have to do is tell your nurses (once you're at the hospital) that no one is allowed in the room and THEY will take care of it. They will keep people out and they will be the bad guys so you don't have to.

And I have to add that is is a WHOLE lot different to want your own mother with you in the delivery room than wanting or not wanting your mother in law...TOTALLY DIFFERENT!
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  #4  
October 27th, 2008, 10:32 AM
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Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 384
I only want my own mother and my SO with me. Unfortunately my Mom can't be there so it will be my SO and I and someone who I deem fit to hold the camera...which at this point are either my BFFs or his in laws and I am sooooooo NOT feeling either!

Tell her you prefer to leave it an intimate moment with yourself and daddy and that she'll have plenty of time to bond with the baby after.

When all else fails, tell the hospital staff NO VISITORS during L&D.
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  #5  
October 27th, 2008, 02:37 PM
Kalia20's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: ontario canada
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It was MY mom that was a headache for me for being in the room, saying it her right. She still to this day says she has more rights to my baby cause without her I wouldnt exist, but thats another story lol.

Just dont tell anyone when you're going to the hospital. I didnt. I didnt want anyone even knowing I was in labour. People were called when we were ready.

If IL's or anyone is calling you daily to see if you've had the baby yet, get in the habit of not answering the phone; screen your calls. You were "in the shower". Same as emails if you get them, or texts. Let others get used to you not answering, cause some people will be sneaky and try calling, try getting you not at home and knowing that way you will be in the hospital if theres no answer, kwim?

I ditto telling the staff. I never had to, cause well, no one knew and it was the middle of the night for me.
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  #6  
October 28th, 2008, 08:56 AM
SamuelsMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Indiana
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The nurses will follow your instructions so if you say no one, they won't let them in, simple as that. Because I had a c-section, the nurse even asked me about others holding the baby before I did. She was completely ready to allow no one other than DH to hold him before me. My mom was the only other person there and I said I didn't mind her holding Sam but my mom refused to hold him before I did on her own. So they will follow any instructions that you give.
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  #7  
November 25th, 2008, 02:06 PM
koalasandduckies's Avatar Super Mommy
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I had this situation when I gave birth. A week before I finally went in though, I told everyone that no one other than DH and my mom would be in the room when I was in active labor. I didn't mind so much before when I was just laying in bed, mainly because they kept me company. But then once I went into active labor everyone was out. And I made sure the hospital staff knew that. After Savannah was born, we called the inlaws and said they could come the following day which pissed MIL off, but I didn't care. And I was the first to hold my baby, I made sure of that too. Hospital staff will work with you on it, just gotta let them know.
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  #8  
December 8th, 2008, 06:32 PM
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Quote:
really i cant be so mad about this because all i have to do is say no but as soon as we told my mother in law i was pregnant all she could talk about was how i have to make sure she can be in the room when im giving birth (not just the beginning oflabor the whole deal) and im thinkin gee lady ive met you TWICE and you really think im gonna feel comfortable with you staring at my vagina waiting for the baby to pop out? riiiight...
i dont even want my mom in there! at that point anyone in there chattering like some da*n hens while im trying to concentrate on having the baby will probably get things thrown at them and cussed out
i just dont understand it... then as soon as i have the baby everybodys gonna want to hold it and frankly id like to have some alone time,just me and the daddy, not in laws and grandparents and great grandparents arguing over who gets to hold the baby next like they did when my bro had his baby, HELL naw..[/b]



tell her HELL NO!!

my mother in law wasnt in the room when my hubby and his ex wifes baby was born so she told me when i was pregnant "you better belive im going to be in there"

so when they gave he he paper at the hospital to say who can be in the room i put just my hubby....

your pregnant use your hormes LOL.. be nice at 1st then if she gets snappy snap right back.. LOL it will help LOL

good luck!
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