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MIL's rude comments


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  #1  
November 20th, 2008, 04:20 PM
short_n_swt's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In the middle of a disaster!
Posts: 2,595
My MIL has a super sly way of making her put downs known. When I was talking with her about how we were considering having my tubes tied or DF having a vasectomy, she replied with "I'd have your tubes tied, if you and DF ever break up, you will obviously take the kids with you, DF might want more kids when he starts a new relationship, you will be bringing two kids already into a new relationship...IF you have one". What the heck? What? My kids aren't good enough for her? (Yes DF is the father of both and neither of us have any other children).
Her comments seem to be getting worse, including at family dinners now. She has an issue with me not allowing my daughter in gymnastics, since she is a national gymnastics judge, she naturally believes my daughter should be in it. I don't agree with my daughter beiing in gymnastics at such a young age-and MIL always finds a way to put me down and how ridiculous she thinks I'm being. Example: At DF's family dinner last week, we were sitting around and I was rolling my daughter in a summersault fashion, but she wasn't being flexible with bending her neck, out of noweher MIL goes "she learns how to bend her neck in gymnastics". Then BIL's gf pipes up and asks why isnt she in gymnastics? MIL says "because somebody won't let her". Similar situations arise all the time, even at Thanksgiving dinner!
Then, at dinner, DF was taking about how the economy in Niagara Falls wineries are shutting down. DF's dad said "so go buy the land!"
Without a beat, MIL pitches in "how could they buy the land? They can't even afford their rent!". Okay, how friggin rude is this? First off, our financial situation isn't anyone's business. Secondly, if we couldn't afford our rent, don't ya think we'd be out on the street by now? Ya, we had some financial trouble while waiting for my mat benefits to kick in.
By the end of the night I was fighting back the tears, because I'm sick of our family being the joke of the night. MIL always feels the need to bring back to me the rude comments SIL makes about me behind my back to her, as well as DF's aunt.
I just don't know how to deal with all of this anymore. Any advice?
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  #2  
November 20th, 2008, 05:52 PM
adam*s_mami's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Michigan
Posts: 2,523
My reply to my MIL, when we were on speaking terms, was to kill her with kindness, when she would do one of her lies things or mindgames i would beat her at her own game, she would say something like I think you should sell your house I mean since DH's job is not stable right now (he is mortgage broker and economy sux) and you cannot afford to pay my mortgage too..Im thinking in my head well you witch we will just simply let the money you spend on crap everymonth go to your mortgage and pay it yourself... But I say "No I will pay your mortgage before my own dont worry, you are like a mother to me I will make sure your taken care of" ....or she would say I will move in with you guys when you have a baby, and that way you can jst go to work immediately and I will take care of the baby....I say to her" oh yes of course It will be so nice to have you take care of the baby so I can work and rest" LOL now in my head I am thinking how much I hate this woman, but outside I pretend like I am an actress and just lie thru my teeth, If that doesn't work do what my dad tells me to do, treat her like she is retarded, you wouldn't be mean to a retarded person or insane right you just think they dont know any better, of ccourse that doesnt work for me since I always have to have the last word, and I no longer talk to my MIL b/c I just dont take her bull###### anymore....
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  #3  
November 22nd, 2008, 05:57 PM
SamuelsMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Indiana
Posts: 16,541
Yikes! That's so hard because you're often speechless and can't think quick enough to make a comeback. I can see why you don't want to be near her when she is so negative all the time toward you. I would tell your DH how much those comments hurt you and see if you can't find a way to let her know that it's not going to be tolerated any more. Hugs!!

Yikes! That's so hard because you're often speechless and can't think quick enough to make a comeback. I can see why you don't want to be near her when she is so negative all the time toward you. I would tell your DH how much those comments hurt you and see if you can't find a way to let her know that it's not going to be tolerated any more. Hugs!!
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  #4  
November 23rd, 2008, 05:10 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,367
Quote:
My reply to my MIL, when we were on speaking terms, was to kill her with kindness, when she would do one of her lies things or mindgames i would beat her at her own game, she would say something like I think you should sell your house I mean since DH's job is not stable right now (he is mortgage broker and economy sux) and you cannot afford to pay my mortgage too..Im thinking in my head well you witch we will just simply let the money you spend on crap everymonth go to your mortgage and pay it yourself... But I say "No I will pay your mortgage before my own dont worry, you are like a mother to me I will make sure your taken care of" ....or she would say I will move in with you guys when you have a baby, and that way you can jst go to work immediately and I will take care of the baby....I say to her" oh yes of course It will be so nice to have you take care of the baby so I can work and rest" LOL now in my head I am thinking how much I hate this woman, but outside I pretend like I am an actress and just lie thru my teeth, If that doesn't work do what my dad tells me to do, treat her like she is retarded, you wouldn't be mean to a retarded person or insane right you just think they dont know any better, of ccourse that doesnt work for me since I always have to have the last word, and I no longer talk to my MIL b/c I just dont take her bull###### anymore....[/b]
Good for you!
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