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Hi, i'm a lurker on here but I just had to let out about what happened today. I guess to give a little history dh was adopted by his grandparents because his mom didn't want him and dad wasn't a father figure. We have a pretty good relationship with his father, but it hasn't been until recently that we've heard from his mom. She enjoys calling us while drunk which we've screened a lot of calls.
Anyways she been on this idea that we are going to visit her in a different town for thanksgiving and meet dh's grandparents (who also wanted nothing to do with him since he never fully met them). We've told her many many times that this is not something we plan on doing, we have our own family plans and we weren't even sure if he was going to be working. She stopped calling for a few weeks but today...has been awful.
She called us in total 9 times (3 times in a row every couple of hours) and would leave these messages about us needing to call her and that she was going to pick us up. Eventually they started to sound extremely hostile and were aimed at me. Dh is already not feeling that great and wanted to wait to talk to her when he felt up to it so when she left her 8th message saying she was calling in another 5 minutes I told him i'd answer. So she calls and I politely tell her he isn't feeling well and can't really talk, but we've recieved the messages and that we have our own plans and will not be able to come out there. We would be fine with arranging meeting on another day in our town, but we just don't feel comfortable with going out there. Then she just said "fine" in an extremely cold manner and hung up.
WTH? She wanted nothing to do with him for so long and now all she does is bug us and is rude to me for telling her the truth. She doesn't even know we are married yet and I honestly don't want anything to do with her. I'm sorry if i'm offending anyone for writing this since I know its not as bad but it still upsets me.
I can't believe she thinks that things will be normal after what she has done to him. I don't blame you for one bit for continuing with your original plans with family that has proven their love for you. She needs to understand that those actions no matter how long ago have lasting consequences. Hugs!
I am so sorry that you all are having to deal with this, Erica. She suddenly wants to be Mom now that he is an adult, has an attractive and intelligent wife, this woman would like to show both of you off to her friends, neighbors and family. She had nothing to do with the man he is. . . she was the one who carried him but that does not mean she deserves the title of Mom.
Sorry. I was starting to go off on a rant.