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ERR!?!?! I was so wrong!


Forum: Inlaws

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  #1  
March 27th, 2009, 05:07 PM
mom2nate
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I always believed my husband when he said he was different than his brothers. I believed he would stand up for me and our son. He has somewhat in the past but not now. I always knew in my heart he would never do or say anything that might remotely hurt his mother's feelings...me? well I tell it like it is I don't care who you are. I don't beat around the bush. There really is no point to...and I have yelled at my own mother more times than I can count ....My husband and I were talking the other day about how it's been almost 2 months since his mom has called to talk about her grandson (our son). So he says I am so sick and tired of her attitude and I am going to call her and tell her how ridiculous she is acting and that I am tired of it all and until she can change she is cut off. I did not suggest he do this nor did I ask him to do it. He came up with it all one his own. I even badgered him about why he wanted to do this all the sudden...why was he fed up now? It has always been like this. So tonight was the night...he called...and guess what.....not one word...they had a nice little conversation about everything...she asked about Nathan once and then went on to another subject (typical-never too interested in him). He hung up and I said, "Man you really let her have it"....I don't understand this at all....I don't understand why he would throw such a fit and say he's going to do something and then bam doesn't do it...Well, actually I know why----because she (his mother) has complete control over him just like her other 2 sons. I really for lack of a better word am shocked....I kind of always knew she had him in the palm of her hand like the other 2 but I really truly honestly believed he was different. I really believed he felt how he said he did....now I feel stupid...I think he just says what he thinks I want to hear and that makes me so so so mad!

***************UPDATE*********************
Oh my gosh! I guess while I was typing this vent he was on the phone with her! How funny. Well, she admitted, finally why she treats Nate differently than the other grandkids...the main reason is because we told her from the beginning that she would not be allowed to take him and keep him for multiple days and there would be no overnight visits without us...you know...we didn't have him so she could raise him for us....Is this not the most assanine reason you have ever heard for a grandmother to ignore and be mean to a grandkid? How ridiculous! My husband said he told her she could change or that would be it. He told her her attitude has to change because we are done dealing with it and we will be making no more effort to make her want to be involved. We'll see. I just can't believe she would act this way all because she can't keep him over night.....jeesh louiseeeee

Last edited by mom2nate; March 27th, 2009 at 06:18 PM. Reason: update
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  #2  
March 29th, 2009, 08:58 AM
SamuelsMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Indiana
Posts: 16,541
That is a very silly reason! I'm glad he finally talked with her about her attitude and laid down the law. I hope he sticks to his guns.
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  #3  
March 30th, 2009, 02:59 AM
Alchemist's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Can i ask why you dont do the overnights? It does seem extreme, unless you have other issues with her care etc. I mean, its also a good break for you btw........
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  #4  
March 30th, 2009, 04:45 AM
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Location: Canada
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Wow, that is a silly reason for her to treat him that way!
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  #5  
March 30th, 2009, 06:12 AM
mom2nate
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Well at first because we lived 300 miles away. And now we live an hour and a half away which is still too far away in my opinion. Also it would be like leaving him in the care of a stranger or our regular cashier at Target...she has not made any effort to know him. She is essentially a stranger to him and that is what she chose. My husband and I are not comfortable leaving him overnights anywhere, with anyone. Just not our style. He is our only child and will be our only child so we're a little over protective Plus it's just the way I was raised...my mom didn't leave me or my brother with anyone overnight until we were old enough to make the decision ourselves...I guess I just inherited it. It's just something my husband and I decided we weren't going to do until he could say he wanted to do it himself.
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  #6  
March 30th, 2009, 09:55 AM
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Join Date: Dec 2008
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mom2nate View Post
Well at first because we lived 300 miles away. And now we live an hour and a half away which is still too far away in my opinion. Also it would be like leaving him in the care of a stranger or our regular cashier at Target...she has not made any effort to know him. She is essentially a stranger to him and that is what she chose. My husband and I are not comfortable leaving him overnights anywhere, with anyone. Just not our style. He is our only child and will be our only child so we're a little over protective Plus it's just the way I was raised...my mom didn't leave me or my brother with anyone overnight until we were old enough to make the decision ourselves...I guess I just inherited it. It's just something my husband and I decided we weren't going to do until he could say he wanted to do it himself.
I don't blame you. My mil wanted us to send down our son when he was 3 for a week! She lives 4 hours away and got very offended when I said no way lol. Last time she was alone with him she looked him in his room because he wouldn't put his pants on! When he is a teen he can visit but no way am I sending him to visit her. I am also overprotective and was never sent overnight to family, although I have allowed my 2 boys to sleep over night with my folks, but they know them very well and see them every week.
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