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My brother's wife is so selfish I can hardly stand it!! They live near my parents and her family and we live 4 hours away. My mom invited them to come with them down here for Easter. Now mind you, they have not seen Nolan yet and we haven't seen them since Christmas. We can't go there because DH has Thur and Sat off so it's too far to drive for one night. But they aren't coming and I know it's all her. She can't syand the idea of spending a holiday with our family instead of hers. My mom said that my brother was talking about driving seperate and coming back Sat. but she told him that was a waste of money to drive that far after everyone is out of work, sleep, then hang out for a few hours before they leave in time to get home before dark. I wanted so bad for my brother to marry someone who I could be friends with but she's not interested at all. I'm so tired of her selfishness. Why can't she think of someone else for once.
And what makes me even sadder is if anything happens to both of us, they would get our kids because my sister is nuts and DH's brothers are too young or not married. I mean if we both died tomorrow she would be holding my baby she's never even met. And would my parents or DH's parents ever get to see the boys? I'm really starting to rethink it but who else is there? Our parents are getting on to retirement and don't need that added responsibility.
Last edited by SamuelsMommy; April 9th, 2009 at 03:24 PM.
I'm sorry. She should have agreed to visit, especially since he hasn't seen Nolan! And really she should be more involved if she agreed to take on any responsibility if anything happened. At is stand for me my parents will look after the kids if something happens because both my brothers are single and would have no clue what to do with three kids and no way would i agree that my step sis in law or sil could have them. They don't even know my sil and my step sis in law is not ideal at all. I feel for you. Do you have any other options?
If something happened to DH and I, I would have to list my sister (who is unmarried) as the guardian. SIL does not like children and neither does her husband. BIL is flaky so he couldn't be given responsibility of another child.
I know we don't have to choose family but we don't have any close friends either. We've moved 7 times in the last 5 years. Unfortunately, they are the best choice at the moment. I would like my parents but anytime I brought that up DH got all defensive like why mine and not his and we all know my MIL isn't fit to raise children but he doesn't see it. My brother is the only stable sibling we have. My brother will be an awesome parent, and I don't think she would mistreat them by any means. I just don't want my children to grow up hardly spending time with their family. I know my mom wouldn't allow it to some extent. My kids are her life so I'm sure she would but her way in nicely. LOL
Aria--For me it comes down to who knows the kids the most and who I know will do what is best for them. We have moved a few times and the few close friends we have are single and not interested so that leaves us with little options. If we had a friend that was interested and actually knew our kids then it would be a different story. I agree with you, blood does not make family but love and bonded relationship does and my family wouldn't be considered blood anyway since we have a lot of adoption.