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Jerks!


Forum: Inlaws

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  #1  
June 22nd, 2009, 11:05 AM
mom2nate
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I posted a while back about some nasty emails my BIL sent me and my husband (his brother). He said some horrible horrible things to me and about me so we blocked his emails and phone calls. Now they are expecting a baby this fall and this is the email he sent us (we unblocked to see news about the baby a few weeks ago)....He is such a jerk!

"I know that you both have decided to not be a part of Anne and I's family, and that is ok. But as a blood relative I would not neglect to at least try and let you know that Anne and I are having a baby boy. Enjoy the rest of your life."

He is such a jerk! Like we are the bad guys here. He made the choice for us not to be a part of things when he said what he said. Ugh these people drive me crazy! I told him that when he wanted to apologize for being a complete jerk maybe we would see but you just can't say such nasty things to people and think it's okay. Which is what he is used to doing....UGH!
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  #2  
June 22nd, 2009, 02:46 PM
SamuelsMommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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That's pretty awful! Hugs!
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  #3  
June 23rd, 2009, 08:10 PM
Mega Super Mommy
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Wow nice how he is acting like he is the innocent victim after being so horrible to you and your dh. Sorry you are dealing with more from him. Hugs to you!
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  #4  
June 23rd, 2009, 08:36 PM
mom2nate
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Oh yeah and he sent my husband another one about how we have chosen to alienate ourselves from the family. We screen phone calls, block emails, never attend family functions, etc. and after choosing to be that way how dare we be offended at what he says. Blah blah blah...I absolutely hate it that things are the way they are because it's his brother but what else can you do? It's like talking to a tree. I am at my wit's end with it and my husband says he's done with him and wants nothing more to do with him. I don't feel that that is the answer but maybe it is the only answer at this point. It seems like things are okay for a while and then BIL blows up, we let it slide and then things are okay for a while but now he can't stand it that my husband isn't just letting it slide this time. He told us that he said nothing wrong and he will not apologize for stating his opinion. So I guess I may as well get used to the idea of having nothing to do with him. I know one thing...I am so tired of dealing with this crap from all of the in laws!
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  #5  
June 24th, 2009, 03:18 AM
Alchemist's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,243
boundaries......... the only answer. If you let him get to you, he is breaching your boundary.

Like i would immediately delete the emails and dismiss nasty comments. why should you not be at family functions. All you need to do is let it bounce off you. at the end of the day, his childish behaivuor will be looked at once you act like adults. Then he will probably hate it more and get more childish...... eventually he will back up when he cant bully you into acting defensive etc....
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  #6  
June 24th, 2009, 07:54 AM
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Do you not to go to family events because of your bil?
I can not stand the drama some of my inlaws create and i always tell myself I will not get involved again and then the next drama sucks me in. Sounds like a really hard situatiion, too bad your bil couldn't behave like an adult.
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  #7  
June 24th, 2009, 08:40 AM
mom2nate
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No we don't go because of BIL. We don't go to a lot of them because we live 3+ hours away and we have a toddler and no money. We don't avoid ALL get togethers we go when we can. I talked to BIL last night and I think things are 3/4 of the way straightened out. My husband and his brother are both too pig headed to do anything themselves
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  #8  
June 24th, 2009, 07:18 PM
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That's very nice of you to talk to him and try to work things out. I hope your bil doesn't start acting like a jerk again.
Ahhh I can understand that. We live about 4 hours away from DH's mom and have 3 kids and no money so we don't go there much at all.
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