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Long story short-DH was talking to his mother regarding an incident with his brother's new baby (4 months), I have mentioned him before...he has heart problems. Anyway I am so sad/angry because of MIL comment she made. She told DH that she doesn't go see the baby b/c she can't stand the fact that he has the mother he has...basically she hates his mother so she wants nothing to do with the baby. I have always known how she really is (UGLY!) but to actually KNOW she will admit it to others just appalls me. I am incredibly disgusted to hear her actually admit she wants nothing to do with her own grandson b/c she doesn't like his mother. She made the comment to me once that *she* will not be a mother to a grandchild of mine.....DH says see I told you she hates her...then she got pregnant and everyone thought it would change but I guess her hatred is true enough that it spills over to the baby too....It just makes me so sad that a grandmother could and would actually think this and do this to an innocent little baby....
Incidentally I know this is the same reason she has never been around Nathan too....I know she doesn't like me....I just could not accept that a grandmother would actually want nothing to do with her grandson b/c of something that stupid....it is really upsetting to me.
I told my mom about it and she said well she is who she is and there's nothing to do about it...yes that's all true but how do you tell your child that his grandmother wants nothing to do with him b/c she doesn't like you?
how do you tell your child that his grandmother wants nothing to do with him b/c she doesn't like you?
You don't. Try very hard as your child grows up not to allow your feelings about your inlaws to show. His relationship with her will be "normal" with her because it's all he's going to know until he's older. Allow her to show herself to be the one who's acting childish. It may very well hurt the child if they realize when they are older that there is an inconsistancy with how they are treated vs their cousins. You didn't say if there were any other brothers or sisters though. Are these the only grandkids? If that's the case then that probably won't even happen b/c she'll treat them all the same. He's better of for her staying away and will develop a healthy relationship with your family It's a good thing your DH see's this behavior.
I agree, you don't. Your child will see for themselves what kind of person she is.
I *try* not to say stuff about MIL. My older boys are 4 and 6. My 4 yr old is the most loving child and does not notice the discrepancies, despite MIL having snubbed him more than once. My 6 yr notices the difference. When my boys mention the grandparents, they are usually referring to my parents.