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  #1  
March 18th, 2010, 10:53 AM
jennmommyoftwobeauties's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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So as you notice I have not been on nearly as much. Things have gotten worse and worse here. I hope I can even get through typing all this without breaking into tears. I have been crying off and on all morning. I have not been on much because #1 my FIL says that the computer is a waste and that it was the dumbest thing invented (that is a matter of an opinion). Then because he does not feel I should be on it he will go from helping me watch the kids a little to not helping at all. I guess he does that to be a jerk. #2 he is still trying to tell me what to do, how to do it, and what to buy our stuff on. He tells me that all the stuff I buy is useless junk. A waste of money. Yet again that is a matter of opinion. It is my money..and if I want to buy it then shut up. I do not want to be around him yet have no choice. I am stuck. Trapped. Each day I get up and I am like "Wow today cannot be as bad as yesterday." Sadly enough I could not be more wrong. It seems to get worse. Not the same...not better.

I had a paper due on Monday, and I almost did not get it in on time because I could not get to it until like 12 at night. It had to be in by 3 am my time. They have caused more problems with my kids, yet have helped less than they used to. The television is always on and an octave where you cannot hear yourself think. He gets mad if my kids are even talking, because he cannot hear his precious tv. Then today he tells me that the bill is this amount as far as he is aware and that is what I have to pay. For me to NEVER watch the tv. Are you kidding me? Or for the internet I seldom get a chance to get on, because god forbid you do not like the computer. I hate it here...I have no choices and I am stuck staying here.

He hates all my parenting choices. He thinks that I should basically let me kids do what they want. I do not think so, because I am beginning to realize that my husband is the way he is because of all that his parents have done for him. He is lazy, does not care about anything, and lately is not supportive. He used to be but now whenever I talk to him on texts he is telling me that he is playing a game and then begins to ignore me. I know that we are going to work this out as we always do, and all marriages are a challenge if not together. But when I am texting you about something that is going on do not begin to play a game and basically ignore me. I have no one to talk to but my SIL. Some situations I can't even talk to her about. Ry has begun to not listen more and more, he fights naptime, fights bedtime (we are talking til' 11 or so), is getting up at the butt crack of dawn, and is always whining. You will not turn my son into a selfish brat. He thinks that everything is his, everything goes HIS way, and that we are always going to cater to him. Not happening.

As if all this is not enough about 3 weeks ago his dad got mad and he stormed out of the room, and said the "F" word. Why? Because he obviously thinks he knows everything...the kids were fighting over a chair...Ry almost fell off of it and I made a noise. He got up and said that is easily resolved. He slammed the chair shut, and puts the chair where he has been putting it. That mad me mad and I did not want to say something I might regret later, so I said "Come on Rylin...lets go upstairs." He seems to think that my taking the kids upstairs is penalizing them. I do not see how. Then the next incident was last weekend. Tommy had duty that day, but had nothing to report to until like 10 am or later. Regardless all I did was make a comment how it was wrong to wake them up at 6:30 on a Saturday when they had nothing for him to do. His dad wanted to argue with me on that, because lord knows he knows it ALL. If you guys have a question ask him, because he knows it all. So he seems to think. Either way he began to talk about it was the military and that it is structured. I said I am not going to say my piece about that. I knew if I did it would feed the fire, so I opted to not speak on it. Well he decides he is going to be an ***** and says "well that is good." That is a big no go with me. I said "Well now that you say that I think I just might say my piece." I am sick of not standing up for myself due to being afraid of what he is going to think of me. It is quite obvious he hates me and he is not going to change his mind. At any rate when I said that he gets up and storms upstairs (keep in mind that I am not allowed to go upstairs with my kids cause it is penalizing them) and at the top of the stairs and yells BI*CH. Wow this is a guy that wants to preach to everyone about how they should pray and have god in their heart. Go open your bible and start to read it. Go back to church and repent your sins cause you are a hypocrite. How dare you.

There is tons more going on then that, but those are the worse situations. I ended up having to open a blog and I did not refer anyone onto it, because I did not want people to think I am all about complaining. I just needed a place to vent. Now whenever I try to be pleasant and talk to him he says...
1) I am going to take the D-O-G for a W-A-L-K
2) I have to go to the bathroom
3) It is quiet I am trying to take a nap
4) Got to make a phone call

He refuses to talk to me now. Not that I care...just means that I do not have to keep the piece with him anymore. Or at least try. If we are not really talking then there will be no problem. It is ridiculous..I have been crying considering I have no clue why he hates me so much, but the biggest problem now is that he wants to keep talking behind my back.

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  #2  
March 18th, 2010, 11:53 PM
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wow, I'm sorry that he is acting that way. Do you tell your DH the things that your FIL says and does when he's gone? Luckily I don't live close to my IL's, so I don't have any advice for you on how to better get along with him, I'm still trying to figure out mine from far away! But I'm glad you can vent here, hang in there and don't let him eat away at you.
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  #3  
March 22nd, 2010, 12:18 PM
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I'm sorry that you are having such a rough time. Is there any way you can move out?

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  #4  
March 24th, 2010, 12:35 AM
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I am so sorry! I don't know your situation - Why are you stuck there? It seems like he has no respect for you, especially to be calling you a name like that. Ridiculous.
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  #5  
March 24th, 2010, 07:53 AM
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He sounds like an awful man...I feel so bad for you being stuck there. Do you not have any family nearby?
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  #6  
March 31st, 2010, 09:08 AM
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We are unable to move out because my husband is in the navy. He is currently waiting to find out if they are going to kick him out. If they do that then we are stuck here even longer then what we already are. I told him that will decide my marriage. I am NOT going to be here with this man any longer then need be. I am already having issues with things as it is. If he stays in then obviously we will get orders somewhere, so it is none logical for me to move out. But right now it is a waiting game to figure out things. Needless to say I am having a hard time.

My husband does not seem to want to talk to me...I am convinced that he is just being selfish because why care if you do not have to deal with it. Right? So I guess that he does not want to hear me complain about it. No matter what I tell him he seems to NOT want to hear me. If I am talking about general stuff he will sit and talk to me, but the minute I complain about his dad he begins to get quiet and tells me that he does not normally talk as it is.

As for family..no the only family I have here are unrelated people or better yet only related by marriage.
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  #7  
March 31st, 2010, 09:14 AM
jennmommyoftwobeauties's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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It is getting to an excessively unbearable point. He does and says things that he knows is going to pi$$ me off. Yesterday we went out and DH's mom was asking me how I had been feeling lately. I explained things to her, and while doing so he turned the music up on the radio and then started to talk over me. He does not want me to feel comfortable it is obvious. Then today he made snarky comments about my daughter. I am sorry if he does not understand. I feel if you are going to be paying to take my daughter to the doctor then by all means. I would never suggest that, but needless to say that is becoming a temptation. I am about to speak my mind more then I want or need to. I am a respectful person, but truly believe that it takes respect to give respect. And well you can see there is NO respect from him. Also, the thing I was explaining with my daughter is that she touches their dog. He rolls himself in the dirt outside as well as anything that is on the ground out there (so if pee or poo from him). He rolls all over the ground. She puts her hands in her mouth all the time...when I say that I mean it. My oldest I am not as bad about it. I make him wash his hands before handling food. Otherwise I am fine. With her I wash her hands the instant that she touches the dog. So just today he says....oh well "Maybe one of these days Emmie you will have a dog that you are allowed to touch as much as you want." I am soooooo sick of his snarky comments. I just want to slap him. I won't but does not mean I do not want to.

I think I mentioned it, but if not I had to open a blog in order to vent due to feeling bad vocalizing it on here as often.
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  #8  
April 1st, 2010, 02:44 PM
Kalia20's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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You have so much more patience than I do. I would've lost it awhile ago I have a very very very different FIL and MIL is worse. Thankfully I dont see them often.
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  #9  
April 4th, 2010, 02:29 PM
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I really hope you get out of there as soon as possible.

Do not feel bad about venting. I'm sorry about DH. It's not fair that you have to live it and he won't listen to what you're going through. If he's not going to listen, how is he going to deal with his family and make them stop? He has no idea what you're going through.

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