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kinda long, but i dont know what to do anymore??


Forum: Inlaws

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October 8th, 2011, 10:11 AM
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1
Ok..where to start? When my boyfriend and I first started dating back in 09, everything was fine and i got along with his mom just fine. We invited her to my family's thanksgiving that year because she only has him around here and figured it would be easier for her to just come to our gathering. Everything seemed fine but apparently at some point, i was rude to her and since then, she has held that against me. i'm really not sure what i did and neither does my b.f. Needless to say, i didnt see her much after that though i did make a mother's day basket for her (in 2010) and we spent the day with her, she was cordial and so was i. Havent seen or talked to her since.

Last november, we broke up for a very short amount of time but then got back together. I'm pretty sure she wasnt aware of this for quite awhile. Well i got pregnant and we only told my family right away because they are rational and supportive people. He ended up telling his mom later when i was probably 12 weeks or so, her reaction was extremely angry and said "I'm not mad that you're having a child, but i am mad that its with HER." Not really the easiest thing to swallow when i heard that. She also called his dad (they've been divorced for years) freaking out and totally spilled the news to him, never giving her son the opportunity to tell his own dad! He basically said "he's almost 30..if this is what he wants, then you have to accept it."

So now i'm 37 weeks pregnant and she hasnt said a word to me, though she asks my b/f how everything is going and how the baby is doing. I invited her to my baby shower, trying to be the bigger person, even though i figured she probably wouldnt come. WEll she said she never got the invite, which i find hard to believe.Oh..i should also mention that this is her first grandchild. I would think that there would be nothing more important than being involved in hr only grandchild's life but so far, she has made no effort to be involved and it makes me really sad for my son. But at the same time, i dont know if i want her to be around if she's going to be so negative. She also has told my b/f that she's still holding out for him to be with this other girl (who he cheated with 2 weeks into our relationship) and she's been married for over a yr! but that's a whole other can of worms!

So, knowing all of the rude things that she has said about me, i find it really hard to want to be around her and forget how awful she has been. I dont know what will happen after i have my baby, but what do i do if she wants to come around to see him? after not being around AT ALL for the pregnancy? i want to take the high road but its really hard when my feelings have been hurt so much, but dont want to deny my son either...
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