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  #1  
August 7th, 2006, 04:22 AM
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Posts: 298
This weekend, my sister, BIL, DH, daughter and I went to the shore for the weekend. When we came home, there was an anniversary gift IN THE HALLWAY OF OUR HOUSE from my ILs.

Here are the problems with this:

They have let themselves into our house in the past (we gave them a key in case of emergency; they live far away...BIG MISTAKE!!!) when we weren't home and we asked them not to do it again. We also ask that they call before they come over; they got all insulted about that, too.

They KNEW that we weren't going to be home. Yet they planned the whole thing out and brought the gift anyway.

I've been taking pregnancy tests since last Thursday and was leaving the unused ones on our bathroom counter. THANK GOD I (for some reason) put them away before we left. My MIL is the Mouth of the Northeast and the entire family would've known we were TTC before we got back last night.

It was the weekend; our entire NEIGHBORHOOD was home. They've met many of our neighbors and could have easily left it with them.

I feel so violated. I want to change the locks and not tell them. DH says that he'll talk to them about it (again).

I also feel like whatever we've said to them in the past has gone in one ear and out the other. They have no respect for the boundaries we're trying to set.

AAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!
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  #2  
August 7th, 2006, 05:56 AM
*Bry*'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 4,643
Quote:
This weekend, my sister, BIL, DH, daughter and I went to the shore for the weekend. When we came home, there was an anniversary gift IN THE HALLWAY OF OUR HOUSE from my ILs.

Here are the problems with this:

They have let themselves into our house in the past (we gave them a key in case of emergency; they live far away...BIG MISTAKE!!!) when we weren't home and we asked them not to do it again. We also ask that they call before they come over; they got all insulted about that, too.

They KNEW that we weren't going to be home. Yet they planned the whole thing out and brought the gift anyway.

I've been taking pregnancy tests since last Thursday and was leaving the unused ones on our bathroom counter. THANK GOD I (for some reason) put them away before we left. My MIL is the Mouth of the Northeast and the entire family would've known we were TTC before we got back last night.

It was the weekend; our entire NEIGHBORHOOD was home. They've met many of our neighbors and could have easily left it with them.

I feel so violated. I want to change the locks and not tell them. DH says that he'll talk to them about it (again).

I also feel like whatever we've said to them in the past has gone in one ear and out the other. They have no respect for the boundaries we're trying to set.

AAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!![/b]
Can U ask for the key back? Since they don't listen to your requests about not letting themselves in --ask for your key back? OR have the locks changed. That would totally bug me.

Also what is it with inlaws feeling all bent out of shape about asking that they call before the visit? (same with my inlaws)
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  #3  
August 7th, 2006, 09:05 AM
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Quote:
Can U ask for the key back? Since they don't listen to your requests about not letting themselves in --ask for your key back? OR have the locks changed. That would totally bug me.

Also what is it with inlaws feeling all bent out of shape about asking that they call before the visit? (same with my inlaws)[/b]
My MIL and her sisters (who live close to her) have the kind of relationship where they're always back and forth in and out of each others' houses. She just refuses to understand that not everyone is like that.

I don't even think we should have to deal with this. I don't even want DH to talk to them. I just want to change the locks and not tell them. That way, if they do let us know that they NEED to stop in when we're not home (to use the bathroom or whatever...we have family to the south of us and they have to pass by our house to get home), THEN we'll tell them that the locks are changed. But if they just stop by again and try to get in without telling us first, they'll get a huge surprise when they can't get in!



DH isn't going for it...he'd rather talk to them...again.
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  #4  
August 7th, 2006, 09:12 AM
appifanie's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: NY
Posts: 1,962
this is why i am relieved my ILs hate me too much to come visit! that's horribly rude -
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  #5  
August 7th, 2006, 01:36 PM
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i would change the locks so fast.
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  #6  
August 7th, 2006, 01:53 PM
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i would change the locks so fast.[/b]
I totally agree; I wish DH did, too. But I do appreciate that he's willing to talk to them. We've had several 'discussions' with them lately about what is appropriate, and I know he's tired of dealing with it. He knows we're right, and he's just as sick of his parents' inconsideration as I am.

You'd think that some things shouldn't have to be said, right?



We did agree that if it happens one more time we'd change the locks.
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