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Forum: Inlaws

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  #1  
August 12th, 2006, 11:25 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 13,328
OK - my in-laws and I have never been close although I have been married to their son for 13 years. I am 36 weeks pregnant and they have known about this since New Years (8 months ago). They have never ONCE called to see how I am doing and how the baby is doing - I am sure this should not surprise me but it really ticks me off in a big way. I think a lot of it is the mother lion instinct - I dont care what you think of me but you are not going to slight my child.....

They do not have much money - but is it too much to expect that they could make a long distance phone call or send a not and pay 39 cents for a stinkin stamp??? Just to say - hey we are really excited about this baby - or WHATEVER???????????????

They will not see this baby when he is born because we now live 400 miles away from them. I have no doubt in my mind that my husband is going to want to go see them in Dec/Jan so they can see the new baby (poor them blah blah blah). Let me tell you though - when that comes and they have made no effort to contact me before then I am not going to feel like travelling 2 miles out of my way to let them see the baby let alone 400 miles.

How do I handle this????

PS - my dh is one of the "men" who would never say anything to hurt his mothers feelings but has no trouble treating me like DIRT.
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JACOB MATTHEW TAYLOR

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  #2  
August 12th, 2006, 12:09 PM
asianmama
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im sorry...... i dont know what i would do. my mil took my one year old yesterday.......... i dont know when i will see her again............ my husband acts like its nothing but it hurts so bad. he also doesnt have a problem treating me like dirt and doing everything in his power to treat his mom.
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  #3  
August 12th, 2006, 01:35 PM
Shaney3401's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Indialantic, FL
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I'm in the same situation as you are. Me and Robert have been togather for almost 6 years now and his mom still treats me like crap. We drove 200 miles to tell her to her face that we are having a baby, and that was back in early March. She has not called me ONCE to ask how I was doing or how the baby was. But she will call Robert's cell phone to talk to him daily. Which pisses me off even more, she can't even call tat house. He wants them to come to the hospital when the baby is born and I'm seriouly doucting that she will even be there. Honestly I don't want her to either. That is going to be my day to sine and brag I'll be ######ed if she comes in there and tries to hold the baby without even asking how I am. I'll have the nurses throw her out. When are these MIL's going to grow up and get over the fact that thier son's are with the women they love. How can they be so jealous? B****** all of them!!!!!
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  #4  
August 12th, 2006, 05:51 PM
*Bry*'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 4,643
Quote:
OK - my in-laws and I have never been close although I have been married to their son for 13 years. I am 36 weeks pregnant and they have known about this since New Years (8 months ago). They have never ONCE called to see how I am doing and how the baby is doing - I am sure this should not surprise me but it really ticks me off in a big way. I think a lot of it is the mother lion instinct - I dont care what you think of me but you are not going to slight my child.....

They do not have much money - but is it too much to expect that they could make a long distance phone call or send a not and pay 39 cents for a stinkin stamp??? Just to say - hey we are really excited about this baby - or WHATEVER???????????????

They will not see this baby when he is born because we now live 400 miles away from them. I have no doubt in my mind that my husband is going to want to go see them in Dec/Jan so they can see the new baby (poor them blah blah blah). Let me tell you though - when that comes and they have made no effort to contact me before then I am not going to feel like travelling 2 miles out of my way to let them see the baby let alone 400 miles.

How do I handle this????

PS - my dh is one of the "men" who would never say anything to hurt his mothers feelings but has no trouble treating me like DIRT.[/b]
I went thru and I am still going thru the same thing. When I first got preg. with Jaden my in-laws never bothered, never asked how "we" were doing or anything (especially considering I lost a baby two years earlier) They never really started to bother with us until I was like 5 or 6 months pregnant. And even then it was not often.

As of now my in-laws do not call and do not come over. They live 5 minutes away or so and they actually went almost 8 weeks without calling or seeing the baby. For a baby --8 weeks is a long time because they grow so much and so many "new" changes come up with babies!

I also understand where you are coming from about your dh being one of those "men" who would never say anything to hurt Mom's feelings. My husband is sort of like that.

In fact today --MIL actually called while we were away because she said "she had a question for dh" (she left a mess. on the machine) Hubby never called her back

She called again just a little while ago and guess what she wanted? Hubby to go over and help his Dad with carpet. Not once did she ask about the baby or the rest of us. Not once. They have not been over in over a month!

They freaking never call us and when they do call or want to come over --it's their last priority of the day & I think they only want to come over to get their "baby fix!"

They don't ever "just call" to say "Hi" or see how everyone is doing.

I used to send them pics in email and update them (and others) with emails on what the baby is doing, etc but I quit. I made it to easy for them to have to "not" call to see how things are going.

My dh always makes excuses for them. They didn't call while I was preg. cuz they were worried I'd lose the baby --(what was their excuse for the pregnancy before this last one? cuz they did the same thing then too!!), There's always an excuse hubby makes up and we fight constantlly about it.

I'm done doing anything extra for these people. I used to --believe it or not but not anymore.

How do you handle your situation? I'm not sure because I'm having the same issues but my inlaws only live 5 minutes away. You could always say it's easier for them to come to use than you dragging a baby and all the stuff to go with baby out and traveling!

I wish you luck because I know exactly what your dealing with dear!
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  #5  
August 13th, 2006, 04:47 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 13,328
Quote:
There's always an excuse hubby makes up and we fight constantlly about it.[/b]





It really does help to know that someone else knows what you are going thru ----although I am sorry that you are going thru it as well!!!
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JACOB MATTHEW TAYLOR

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