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Caller ID was MADE for people like me. Since I got pregnant, I have found myself "unable" to answer the phone - as in, I screen every freakin' call that comes in. Seriously. I'm terrible, I know, but I just have so little patience for telemarketers or wrong numbers, or even worse, INLAWS, now that I am built like Shamu (with the appetite to match.)
Anyways, phone rings this afternoon, and it's one set of inlaws -- my DH's stepbrother and his girlfriend. Obviously, I sit beside it and watch the phone ring. Then, I check the voicemail. As a brief flashback, this is the couple who gave us dog chews for Christmas, and recently invited us for brunch - which turned out to be "hey can you come and wire seven new lights in our condo while we pretend it's just a visit over bruch?" (I definitely bailed out on that little escapade.)
So. Message is along these lines:
"Hi Mr. Jilly and Jillylicious, it's Cheap and Selfish calling. We wanted to thank you for the Christmas gift you gave us - we totally did not expect you to be so thoughtful."
(I'm sorry, what were you expecting? Should we have set a bag of dog poop on fire and left it on your doorstep? Duly noted.)
"The sign looks great and we got a big kick out of it. We can't wait to hang it in the bathroom after we're finished our big bathroom renovation."
(Oh, so that must be why you could only afford dog chews as a Christmas gift for family. I understand, it's a toss up between family and the $700 Kohler faucet. Tough call.)
"We're sorry we missed you, Jillylicious, we really wanted to know how you are feeling and how the baby is and how everything is going with your pregnancy."
(Well, golly - now that you've had six months to get used to the idea of me being pregnant, you're suddenly interested? That's kind of strange, since you haven't asked how I'm doing ONCE since the day we announced it back in August. Hm.)
"We'd love to hear back from you guys! Hope you're doing well."
(Yup, doing just fine. Even better now that I avoided a conversation with you.)
It just IRKS me. Why do we all have to pretend to be so fake? Why are all we pretending that we appreciate each other's so called generosity (I'd also like to make it clear that as soon as we received the aforementioned dog chews, I initiated the thank you process by leaving them a voicemail message GRACIOUSLY thanking them for the dog chews and letting them know how much the dogs liked them. The following weekend, DH spent 4 hours installing new lights in their bathroom, for free. We are not letting our resentment betray us, no sirree.)
The only time we ever hear from them is when they want something - lights installed, furniture moved with DH's trucks and trailers, whatever. They've never asked about the baby, they spent a grand total of $7.50 on our Christmas gift, and NOW they think one little phone call saying thanks makes everyone buddy-buddy?
Where do people come UP with this?!
It just makes me shake my head... My inlaws are RIDICULOUS! Have they never heard the saying "Actions speak louder than words"? Cause I've got a few actions I'd like to share with 'em.
I was thinking the same thing the PP said, "I wonder what they wanted Mr. Jilly to do for them in their new bathroom?" LOL I totally know what you mean. When my MIL starts in comparing herself to my mom (she always wants to know what my mom bought for Samuel, how often she visits etc), I often have to do that fake, "What do you mean? You're a wonderful grandma!" Yeah, right... It really stinks. We don't even have a home phone for the first time. DH and I only have our cell phones which are the same carrier as both our families so we can talk for free. We don't have enough people call us that aren't on our carrier to justify having a home phone too. We never use all our minutes. So the ILs always call his phone which gets me out of having to talk to them 99.9% of the time. And it comes with the lovely caller ID for ignoring unwanted calls as well. It's a win-win! I feel your pain. Sometimes you wish you could just tell it like it is and that we didn't have to be "polite." Sigh...
I tell ya, it's just a matter of time before I SNAP AND LOSE IT on these people... Pregnancy has really turned on my B*tch Switch, I can't wait to see what no sleep for 17 days does to it when the baby is here.
I snapped on my MIL right before our wedding. She was being self centered and inconsiderate - as she has been all through DH's life and it really had hurt him.
Long story short, sometimes putting people in there place and telling them exactly what you think isn't always a bad thing. Sure, she was angry because she had to take a good long hard look in the mirror. But now she says she realizes what she's done and is trying to be a better person. And she's been doing better so far. We'll see how long it lasts.
At least you could blame your "b*tchiness" on your pregnancy. I had nothing to blame it on, other than just being a b*tch in general. LOL!