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Okay, MIL told me over and over again NOT to have an epidural. She said "you don't want that baby drugged up when it's born."
apparently she doesn't know anything about modern medicine because epidurals don't affect the baby.
So in L&D when I said "Give me the epidural" she freaked out at my husband who said "Mom. She is in pain. She is GETTING the epidural." like his mom had any say. GRRR
I ended up not having time to get one anyway.. but meh.
As for raising a child.. if she had it her way I wouldn't ever have picked my baby up at night when she cried as a newborn and I would have started cereal at 2.5 months (which might explain why my husband weighed 27 pounds at 3 months.. though now he's tiny) They always tell me that if I hold the baby too much I will "spoil her". Apparently they haven't done much research on the subject because it's impossible to spoil a baby. You're SUPPOSED to go to them every time they cry because it reassures them that they can count on you. If you don't, it can lead to major emotional and psychological problems down the road.
Like, I should have let him chew on a freakin' corndog when he was 2 months old, because he would like it! Yeah, sure. Straight from formula to corndog at 2 MONTHS OLD, not only is it disgustingly unhealthy, he would have choked to death on it. But, everybody in that family does crap like that, that's why they have never babysat him. I am literally the first person to put my foot down and not bend to her every whim! That's why she hates me Oh, I could write a novel. I think most of us on this board could, huh?
As I'm not expecting, and haven't been informed (probably because I'm not expecting, lol), I don't know what her views on child birth are. Doesn't matter anyway, because DH and I want to do home births if at all possible. So, no matter her opinion, she has no say.
On child rearing... I'm quite relieved in a way that we don't have a little one entering the world any time soon, because I CAN wait for the blowup that will happen when that happens! MIL (and FIL) believes that grandparents are JUST as responsible for the discipline and training of the grand kids, and that they have JUST as much say in how the kids are educated, what is used TO educate them, what sorts of clothing they wear, when they have to wear coats/sweaters (for some reason they think you need to put kids in WINTER coats when it is 60-70 degrees out!!!), when it is warm enough for just a long sleeve shirt/t-shirt... I think this must be "when it is almost 80 degrees" because she insisted my niece (age 5) needed a jacket when it was 75 degrees last week! And... any number of other things. Plus, they think that spanking is an appropriate discipline measure for the GRANDparents to be taking! Seriously, if the parents choose to, then they can, but grandparents?? YIKES! I would NOT want to be their grandchild if left in their care. Anyway, they will NOT be watching our kids when we DO have kids, because they have some unacceptable views/practises with our niece and nephew already!
The one thing that my MIL says/does is just becuase they did things a certain way 25 years ago she thinks thats still the world we live in.
We never needed car seats with our kids, we always used heavy blankets to cover them up with, and on and on it goes. She also seems to think its her RIGHT to be called IMMEDIATELY when I go into labor and be at the hopsital with us because she gave birth to DH. Its going to be a LONG week after Gabriella is born. *sigh* (She wants to come and stay a week with us)
Thankfully they were too far away to give much advice. I don't talk to her on the phone so she had no chance to give advice but I'm sure she had plenty of it because she used to be a nurse. She did say to me "As soon as you're done bfing you're going to have another one at 9 months or so right?" NOT Actually, it's only the 9 months part that is wrong. We will be having another once we're done bfing, but since I'm still bfing that's not yet! And 9 months is a little early to stop bfing IMO. I don't get much child rearing advice for the same reason.
This one REALLY burns me: We live in my inlaws basement apartment while we are waiting for our house to be built ....My 3 year old went through a tantrum throwing phase. She hears it and comes dowN STAIRS TO COMFORT HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Are you freaking kidding me??? First...not your kid...second...give into a tantrum only creates more duh.
She thinks its okay to give my child candy everyday! Ummm, I'm not opposed to a treat but everyday is rediculous!
Oh, let me count the ways that MIL has tried to interfere!
When Emilee was a baby, we would go to her house and she would insist that Emilee sleep with her and SFIL in their bed. I'm all for cosleeping, but two severely overweight heavy sleepers are NOT the optimum people to be cosleeping with an infant. THanks, but I think she was safer in my arms.
She's had an opinion on everything. She tried to feed Emilee spaghetti when she was 2 months old. YEah, that didn't happen.
Umm... what else? Oh yeah, she insisted that Emilee had some sort of brain cancer b/c she didn't get "red eye" with the photographs I took. Um, it's called EDITING!!
Yeah... and DH wonders why we don't visit her often!
Writer, Navy wife, autistic mom of two autistic kids (E is 6, C is 5).
not much on the child bearing, she hasn't said anything, but she has already told me about all the firsts she's planning to enjoy with our baby...
"I'll be the first to take him/her fishing"
"I'll be the first to bake cookies with him/her"
"I'll be the first to take him/her camping"
Um, no, you won't, cause it's MY KID. I had to push it out, I get all the firsts I choose![/b]
ha my mil is the same way she thinks just because she is getting my son a easter basket we dont need to get him one and everything else like hes her child its like hes my child i can get him what ever i want shes too is already talking about going fishing with her and grandpa first time buying him his first fishing pole she bugs me lol she is now barely listening to our rules like i dont want my son to have soda or coffee but she was giving it to him shes all its not going to hurt im like well i dont want him having it its like she tries to take him over