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Forum: Trying to Conceive

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  #1  
March 15th, 2005, 08:07 AM
homemakermommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Does anyone elses family act negetively about new babies? My mom had 4 girls and I guess she felt like she was missing out on something because whenever one of us gets preggo she never has anything nice to say. My oldest has 1ds and 1dd, I have 2dds, the 3rd sister has 1ds and 1dd, and the youngest has none yet. With every pregnancy we have called her excited and her response always ranges from "Your making me old","Do you really need that right now","Aren't you guys done yet", etc etc. When me and my older sister told her we were going to try for #3 she said " Why are you guys in such a rush can't you just wait I can't afford anymore grandchildren". Now I am 29 and my sister is 31 how old does she want us to be. Besides she had already had all 4 of us by that age so she can't really talk. Later on she gets excited and buys us stuff and is always present for there births but for once it would be nice for her to say " Congratulations I'm so glad to have another grandchild" like other peoples parents. All my friends parents are bugging them to have children and give them grandchildren and when they get preggo there parents are bouncing off the walls with excitement but no not mine. The only pregnancy she was ok with was my 2nd dd because she loves my dh and felt like we had all our ducks in a row. I think she must feel like she missed out on alot having us girls and does not want us to do the same.
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  #2  
March 15th, 2005, 08:46 AM
_Brandy_'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I hear you.

While my parents are happy, Kirks' parents are mad as all hell at us. At least your mom isn't too bad about it. kirks' dad suggested we terminate.
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  #3  
March 15th, 2005, 08:50 AM
KitKat
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Quote:
Originally posted by brandybehr@Mar 15 2005, 12:46 PM
I hear you.

While my parents are happy, Kirks' parents are mad as all hell at us.* At least your mom isn't too bad about it.* kirks' dad suggested we terminate.
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Are you kidding? What a horrible thing to have your parent (in-laws) suggest!!!

Oh Brandy, I'm so sorry. I'm fortunate to have a mother-in-law who I adore and who adores me. We are more like best friends than in-laws to each other. We tell each other EVERYTHING... (which by the way drives DH up a wall! ha) I know that she will be exstatic over my being pg! I actually plan to have her be the first to know after DH. I plan on telling her before I even tell my own mother!
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  #4  
March 15th, 2005, 08:50 AM
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I got people in my family just like that when i had my 2 m/c it's like a gift or something i only have one child and they want me to wait until i finish with school(which i have never start with) so i'll be 30 by then.I won't be waiting so if they don't like it that's their business. Just do what you and your hubby want to do it's your life.
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  #5  
March 15th, 2005, 09:00 AM
zoey's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Sad!! My family is pushing for a baby. His family quietly asks and hopes. The inlaws are really far away, 24 driving hours, so they wont be able to be a part of everything anyway.
But.. Dh was talking to MIL about us starting to try and asked her some questions (mostly because he didn't want to burst his sister or ours bubbles if his sister and we both had babies at the same time.. mama's favorite is his one sister whos been ttc for the last year, and Im sure if she has hers near when we do, we'll never see his parents, and he wants ours to be speical, at the same time he doesn't want to hurt her excitement either.. anyway)... my DH said its a joke around here that we are going to have a 4 kids and his parents had 4 kids, and she said if she could do it all over again she'd only have had 2. We hadn't decided if we wanted 1 or 4, but it was fun thinking about having 4, and that kind of burst our bubble a bit.
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  #6  
March 15th, 2005, 09:20 AM
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My mother wanted me to abort Freja. Needless to say I won't be telling her I'm pg till I'm almost ready to pop (which will be easy with our upcoming move)
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  #7  
March 15th, 2005, 09:28 AM
TexMex's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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That stinks! Sorry you have to hear that from your mom

I'll be 30 in April, my mother tells me I shouldn't wait much longer not only because your fertility drop a certain percentage every year starting as early as 27 years old, but she went through early menopause at age 42-43. So I will probably go through early menopause myself so I have a feeling I will have problems in my mid-late 30's if I waited...thankfully I don't have to wait
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  #8  
March 15th, 2005, 09:34 AM
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Hi girls,

My mom also has 4 girls (and 1 boy) and is never "thrilled" when we tell her we are pg. It seems like she needs time to adjust to the news and then she is very excited!! I agree with you that they feel like maybe the missed out, with so many kids that really is all you have time for. My parent's also got divorced when I was 8 so she had us all on her own from then on (my twin and I were the youngest though). She's always been a wonderful mom but I think she worrys about us.

Good luck! Your not alone in that experience!

Tryingfor3
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  #9  
March 15th, 2005, 09:48 AM
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My mother has been pushing for me to get my tubes tied and my dad always goes 'Oh shut up you old hag' LMAO My dad supports us. HEHE
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  #10  
March 15th, 2005, 10:06 AM
homemakermommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally posted by Trying for 3@Mar 15 2005, 12:34 PM
Hi girls,

My mom also has 4 girls (and 1 boy) and is never "thrilled" when we tell her we are pg.* It seems like she needs time to adjust to the news and then she is very excited!!* I agree with you that they feel like maybe the missed out, with so many kids that really is all you have time for.* My parent's also got divorced when I was 8 so she had us all on her own from then on (my twin and I were the youngest though).* She's always been a wonderful mom but I think she worrys about us.*

Good luck!* Your not alone in that experience!

Tryingfor3
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This sounds so much like my family that it's scary. My mom actually micarried with a boy so she would have had 5 of us. She also raised us pretty much alone and had some bad relationships on and off so I know it was hard for her. I guess mabe she just worries.
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