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HI all. Its been about three years since I were here last. I have a 10 year old and a 3 year old. I was just told by my husband no more babies. My heart is broken and I dont know what to do---- have any of you experienced this?
I've actually been the opposite side of this. For several years I said I didn't want anymore. We even made the "official" decision that we were done. Several years after that decision we are TTC. I just needed time to know that I did want one more.
What are his reasons? Are they things he might be able to get past?
Im kinda on the same boat. We have 4. But i do want more. My husband said he wouldn't mind but doesnt want to hear the comments. "another one" "omg u have already have 4". I say i dont care what people say or think. We have some amazing kids so why wouldnt we have more. The world needs more people like my kids. Im not a bragger but when it comes to my kids i am. Have you told him how you feel? Have you told him your heart broken and cried in front of him about it? So he can see your emotion about it. That may sound bad but it worked for me. My hunny seen my heart an soul in it an agreed. Hope that makes sense. I will pray for you.
We had a very very needy baby. I also suffered post partum depression. He says he just fels selfish and is happy with our two kids. He also states financial issues, but theres really none.
Our daughter was very high maintenance (still is to an extent) which really put a damper on DH's desire to have several children. He says he for sure wants to have 2 but he isn't too excited for kids beyond that. He does however, know how much I would like to have 3 or 4 and has consented as long as everything is still ok with my health in the future. I would try to explain to him how this is one of your top priorities in your life. Rate it on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being most important, 1 being least). Ask him to rate his desire not to have kids. If he rates he desire not to have kids as a 7 and you rate your desire to have kids at a 10 then it shows how much more it matters to you in comparison...we do this sometimes and then we compromise to give the person with a much stronger preference what they want.
Yes, he has been cursed with the memories of our colic, acid reflux, and torticollis child has brought upon us..lol. I have tried to tell him, just because one was that way does not mean the next will be. He is like not one tiny bit of me wants another and doesn't seem to be budging. He is a stubborn as a mule. He says over and over 2 kids are enough but dang it I want one more!