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DH and I have still been working at things but nothing is really getting better. I have been gone for 3 weeks now and every time he takes a step forward he takes 5 leaps backwards. He decided that the only person he could talk to about our problmes is his Ex who we have had issues with before. Ive asked him time and time again for him to stop talking to her and thats one of my things that I will not come home at all if he does not break all ties with her and so far I dont think hes done it.
Well I went to DHS to turn in paperwork to get bennifits for me and Shyann and I have to file in another county because Im living with my dad. So I filed there and then found out that my medicade that I have with my husband in the county where I was living with him in was terminated. So I called both DHS offices to see what was going on. No one knows why it was terminated but I did learn from my worker in the county that I just filed seperate from my husband that I will not be able to get Shyann's medicade transfered nor will I be able to get food stamps for her because he still claimes her on his stuff through DHS in his county and I cant apply for her too unless he takes her off of his.
This angers me so much because he wont do it. I have Shyann full time, she always sleeps under the same roof as I do and I have offered to let him have her on weekends because he dosent work on weekends and he turned me down so why should he get to get money for food for her when he only has her a few hours a week?
She said that the only way I can get them for her is if I get it court ordered and Im not ready to go that far but I only make like $200 a month and I cant feed us both on that.....does anyone know the laws on this? I just cant belive this is going to happen. Hes going to make me look like the bad parent because I cant afford to feed her.
Unfortunately, I don't see any way around this without a lawyer unless he is willing to give you the money he is getting--which it doesn't sound like he is going to do that either. Perhaps a call to HIS caseworker letting them know that you've moved out and he doesn't see you or your daughter for more than a couple of hours a week? I just don't know much about how the welfare system works. Sorry I couldn't be much help.
I agree with Dani. Until papers are signed, nothing is official and really can't be changed but you can ask around about legal aid where you live. Usually each city has a group of attorneys who provided legal services for a reduced rate. I would also call your local police because without custody papers if you freely release the child to him, he doesn't have to give her back to you. Even if there are temporary custody papers, police will not remove a child without a separate pickup order which has to be signed by a judge. That is how it works where I live and it may be different where you live, but I would check on that as well since you have already said he could come get her. I've talked to mothers and wanted to cry because when they call on Sunday afternoon and daddy let her know he won't be bringing the children home & I tell her we cannot remove the children, even WITH custody papers, that she will have to contact her attorney to go before a judge to ask for a pickup order for her own children...it is hard. Even worse when the patrol supervisor has to tell mothers (and fathers) that if they go try to get them, THEY could get arrested for trespassing or creating a domestic violence situation.