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Our exes sent the police to our house!


Forum: Divorce and Separation

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  #1  
March 8th, 2011, 06:20 AM
LadyFlyAway's Avatar My 4 Babies Are My Life!
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Georgia
Posts: 1,616
Before I begin, I need to give everybody a little background so you will fully understand the situation.

I got divorced last May. My ex husband, Sergio, left me and our four children for another women, Samantha. Samantha left her ex husband John and her two boys for Sergio. I met John during our simultanious divorces and we fell in love and got married this past October. So, all four of us basically switched partners..I know it's crazy but that's life isn't it

Both John and I got custody of our children. My ex Sergio didn't want custody and just gave me Primary Guardianship. John's ex Samantha took him to court trying to get custody back in June, but due to the fact that she left the two boys with their father, ran off and had an affair, got pregnant, and didn't financially support the boys in anyway, the judge granted Primary Guardianship to my husband.

John and I live in Georgia, in a house with all six of the children. Sergio and Samantha moved to Kentucky, with their new baby, where he is in the Army.

Samantha has made it very clear that she is going to come back and try to regain custody of her two boys. She has told the boys and told me and John. Because of this, John and I have to be very careful of everything we do when it comes to all the children...as Samantha will look for ANYTHING she can to use against us in court, hence prove us unfit. Lately it's been especially bad when it comes to this because:

1.) Her oldest son fell outside and broke his arm.
2.) Her boys are getting very close to me and express that to her by telling her that I hug them, kiss them, they have asked to call me mom, ext...
3.) My husband chose to put their oldest son on medication for ADHD after his teacher suggested we have him evaluated. We took him to TWO different doctors who did evaluations before my husband chose to medicate.
4.) Her youngest son has some anger issues, after all the changes he went through this past year, and we chose to send him to a child therapist, which is actually really helping him.

Because of the things listed above, Samantha is being very coniving and spiteful. She has told my husband that we only medicated Caiden because I (a SAHM) can't handle six children and that we chose to put Ryan in therapy because I hurt him mentally and physically. THIS IS NOT THE CASE! I very much love Caiden and Ryan. I am with them before school and after school as their Bonus Mom, who does give them hugs and kisses and tries very hard to give them a stable, good, and loving place to live. I don't treat these boys any different than the four children I birthed! I think she is mad at me because I love them so much.

Well, last night, our children talked to their other parents. John and I were in our room while the children talked..I was getting ready for bed and John was getting ready for work. The children's conversation ended and we went to bed...John went downstairs to get his shoes on to leave for work. All the sudden he comes to me and tells me the police are here!!! We both run outside and the officer tells us this....

"Your Ex Wife Samantha called the Gwinnett Co. police dept and told them that you two left your children home alone. She said that while she was talking to Caiden and Ryan, Ryan told her that you and your husband had left them alone at the house and because she didn't hear either of your voices, she hung up with her boys and called the police. I can see that this in fact a false complaint as you are both here and that will be documented in the police record, which is probably what your ex wife is after." We had the officer come inside and talk to the boys about telling mommy lies and how it can result in the police coming too so they won't do anything like this again.

My husband and I are floored about her actions!!! First, she should have asked the boys to put John or I on the phone if she had concerns like that! Second, there is no way she didn't hear my husband or me telling the boys it was time to end the phone call and get ready for bed. Regardless of what she should have done though, she sent the police to our house and we don't know what to do.

I need suggestions for what we should do now. John and I will not loose Caiden and Ryan. We both love them too much! The boys are doing really well too...in fact all the hcildren are! My oldest child just got tested for the "Gifted Program" in school and has all A's and B's. Caiden has all A's and B's now that he's on medicine. Aniya is doing great in Kindergarden. Ryan's attitude has improved and he's happier. The children have me at home with them daily, as I am a SAHM. They aren't in daycare or with strangers (no offense to moms who choose outside childcare!!! It's just not what my DH and I want for our kids.) They are feed healthy meals, often organic. They are getting enough sleep. They are taken to the park, out for treats here and there, bathed and groomed everyday, taken to church, in extra curricular activities, involved with their grandparents, and loved, loved, loved! We are doing nothing wrong!!! What can John and I do to prepare for her taking us to court, or for her calling the Dept of Family and Children's Services (I'm sure that's her next move).

Please help me, I'm beside myself right now.
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  #2  
March 24th, 2011, 07:52 PM
divna's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: North Vancouver, Canada
Posts: 2,277
I think you are both doing an awesome job, it is apparent to me and will be to any judge that you are taking the education and well being of all your children very seriously.

I don't think you will have too much to worry about if it does go to court as all the things you listed above show that you are very involved and care about them....as for one of your children breaking his arm....these things happen and courts know this, unless there was any kind of abuse involved no court would hold that against you!

her false police report will be a huge hinderance to her now, she was very stupid to do that and it she's is unreasonable and perhaps unstable!
goodluck
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  #3  
March 29th, 2011, 11:38 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Georgia
Posts: 1,250
Oh hun, it sounds to me like you are a great mom. The fact that you were home when the police came out will only work in your favor. Not hers! I don't have any advice to you other than to keep being a great parent and I hope the best for you guys!
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  #4  
April 15th, 2011, 12:28 PM
Mom to minions's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Michigan
Posts: 657
Oh... She sounds like my ex MIL. She has called CPS so many times, it is not funny. This is the way to look at CPS. If you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to fear other than getting a neat freak caseworker who decides you have a messy house... which will result on them visiting you for a 2nd time. IF they find something wrong, then they will open a case. Otherwise they won't and it will go in a file that there was no danger. I suggest you do learn your rights with them (the mean ones will try things, but many of them are nice!).

Your medical records you have for your kids should be plenty if she tries to go after you. and YOU need to get a copy of that police report for your own records. You have proof that she abandoned them, she is starting things, and that you are taking proper care of the children including getting second opinions for medication and having your son see someone (without them telling you that you need to). And sometimes having a stupid ex (or in my case MIL) only helps prove what a good parent you are. It says a lot when I have NEVER had a case opened, I have had to have background checks for not only my previous job, but for my degree and wow, they are clean. Also I am a DHS certified care giver aid. So anymore I just laugh.

Just make sure you keep records. If CPS does come out, know your rights if you do get a caseworker that you don't feel right about, and you do have the right to get a copy of her notes of her interview with you. Get them.

If you have any questions, feel free to PM me. I have no problem sharing my experiences.

Although my ex MIL no longer calls since she found out I live with SO. They are the type of people who will push you around because they can. But they fear my SO because they do not know him and are probably afraid he will file for harassment.
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