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i finally separated fully from my husband last year....we had been married for almost 5 years and have a 4 year old son together.
our marriage was plagued by his alcohol abuse and verbal and rarely even physical abuse.
For the last year we were living together basically as roommates, he would sleep on the couch when he was in town and the bedroom was mine. He worked very far away for weeks at a time and would come home for about 6 days and leave again, this suited me just fine.
He was never, from the birth, a large part of our son's life....he worked a lot and always complained of being tired or was drunk, so i had my son with me constantly unless i was working.
I initially left him late in 2009 and was award sole custody due to his alcohol abuse....we somewhat reconciled and he moved in with me few months later again as he had stopped drinking. When i finally kicked him out last year again it was largely due to me knowing he was drinking again.
Since last November it seems overtime I go to court over custody he is granted a little more time with our son, including far more overnights than i am happy with.....I feel hopeless about it. He moved back into town about a month ago and has now been given his every Tuesday and Thursday overnight and every second weekend. Even though he finally admitted to the judge he was drinking occasionally. ( i think its a lot more than occasionally).
He is currently living with his parents and that is why the judge initially granted him overnight visits as he believed it was a safe environment for my son if his grandparents were there.
I live in Canada although im originally from Scotland and it seems all the courts here care about is dividing custody equally as they think that is best for all children in Canada it seems.
I am currently 2 months pregnant with my new partners child and Im finding it very upsetting thinking that my Son will only get to spend half his childhood with me and his sibling when it is born.
I was hoping to meet some women here in similar situations to me for advice and understanding....