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At my wits end and need advice


Forum: Divorce and Separation

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  #1  
April 14th, 2011, 09:11 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: texas
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I am not divorced or separated from my husband, but I'm at my wits end. I have two small children and I work full time out of the house. My husband works three days a week and doesn't help with any of the bills. He works weekends and I work Monday through Friday 7- 5. He refuses to keep the kids in the day because all he wants to do is stay up all night and sleep all day while I'm working to pay all of the bills. I literally have to get up and get myself and the kids ready while he sleeps because he stayed up all night watching tv and drinking. I then take the kids to daycare so I can go to work and he sleeps the entire day until 3 in the afternoon. If the kids get sick, I have to take a day off from work. I am barely able to pay the bills and stay afloat. Some months there is not enough money to buy food and pay the bills. I have cut the bills down to bare necessities and still struggle to have food, electricity, a roof and running water. I am so tired of it. I have to work all day and then come home to wash dishes, clothes, cook, bath kids, clean the house, etc. My husband is home all day and yet cant seem to load the dishwasher, wash clothes or do anything that would help around the house. I feel like I have a teenager and two toddlers living in my house. He does not help with any financial decisions, nor any important grown up decisions. It is like I am a single mom. I love my husband, but I am beginning to resent him. I try to be a good person to him, but I am so exhausted. I have even taken on a second job out of the house to try to make extra money that I do at night. Something has to give because I don't know how much more I can take. All I want is for him to help out more around the house and contribute financially. I have begun to wonder if he even cares about me or loves me. He makes life hard on me and doesn't even care. I've tried talking to him about it, but he just ignores me or tells me he will change and nothing changes. I want a good life for myself and my kids. It is not good for them to see there daddy be like this. He is so lazy and acts like I should serve him. I never pictured my marriage and my life to be like this. It is just so sad and it is eating me up. I stay strong for the kids, but it is killing me slowly each day. I have become hard towards my husband and I'm tired of struggling to make it. I will not let my kids go without, so I go without on a regular basis. If theres not enough money for food, my kids get fed and I go without. I guess I feel very alone because I have no one to talk to about it and it is just so hard. I desperately need a friend.
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  #2  
May 25th, 2011, 12:27 PM
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Join Date: May 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 192
Hun! I understand how you are feeling. I am going through some of the same things with my BF..we have been together for 9 yrs now we have 2 kids, and maybe a 3rd... and we are constantly fighting over him helping more with the kids, financially, spending more time at home with his family instead of out in the street with his friend from work and smoking in the garage...He helps every now and then but I have to tell him to give the kids a bath or clean or take out the trash...it is really agravating me to the point where I am always angry with him and my life. we hav trust issues...just a big mess right now and I dont think it will ever get better..its like instead of showing and doing right when I tell him what he is doing is wrong...he walks out and keeps doing it...Like I am fed up and ready to walk...but I love him so much and want is to work...he just needs to do better nd change...if he dont I have to leave...

We can be friends....support!!
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  #3  
May 25th, 2011, 08:35 PM
KrazE's Avatar ShutTheFrontDoor
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,546
File for a divorce & hand him the papers - he'll either get the picture that you've had enough and straighten out, or you can begin the steps of a new life with the children where you're not treated like trash.

It's time to stand up and realize that you deserve better, and that your children have the right to know that this is not how you treat people you love; that marriage is about love & mutual respect.
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  #4  
May 26th, 2011, 08:09 PM
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Location: Mississippi
Posts: 192
KRaze...your words are so true!!
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  #5  
May 27th, 2011, 09:14 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Kentucky
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KrazE View Post
File for a divorce & hand him the papers - he'll either get the picture that you've had enough and straighten out, or you can begin the steps of a new life with the children where you're not treated like trash.

It's time to stand up and realize that you deserve better, and that your children have the right to know that this is not how you treat people you love; that marriage is about love & mutual respect.
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