Log In Sign Up

Needing Encouragement


Forum: Breastfeeding

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Breastfeeding LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
April 24th, 2008, 09:09 AM
JMTSMOMMA's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Manitoba,Canada
Posts: 7,275
Hey all. Long time lurker first time posting. I am coming out looking for encouragement with keeping up breastfeeding.

DS is 4.5 months old and EB with the exception of the odd pumped bottle when I need to be away for longer than 3 hours (rare).

It has been a wonderful experience but is really taking a physical toll on me. My weight has dropped drastically since giving birth/starting BF. No issues like thyroid or anything. Doc says I am just naturally a small woman and need to eat more...impossible!. (5'2", 110 Pre-Preg). However, I am now hovering around 100 pounds. I eat a TON of food but DS is a big boy (28 inches long, 16.5 pounds) and a very demanding eater! It feels like he is draining me some days. I take a supplement vitamin but still most days I am exhausted and weak.

Add to that the fact that I am (I think due to the BF) the only person/thing that can EVER console him when he is upset. DH is becoming miserable and feeling inadequate as a Daddy these days. He fully supports my BF for as long as I/DS can but admits he wishes that he could be of more comfort to his son.

Teething and milestone waking are just the latest in the mix.

I love my son with all my heart and want to give him what is best. I guess a am just feeling soooooo discouraged even though things are perfectly fine and we are having no real issues with the BF. Is this normal? Anyone else experience these feelings along their BF journey? Tell me it will pass!

Words of wisdom/support appreciated and welcomed.

Thanks ladies.


**UPDATED TO THANK YOU ALL**

Thanks so much for the advice and encouragement. Just wanted to let you know that we made it over the hump and are continuing to breastfeed. Getting out sometimes and leaving DH with pumped milk has helped my mood A LOT, plus all the changes in diet really made a difference in how I was feeling physically. Thanks you again ladies. You are all awesome
__________________


~Sometimes the days seem long, but the years are so very short.~

Reply With Quote
  #2  
April 24th, 2008, 09:30 AM
Spacey Stacy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Indiana
Posts: 17,667
I'm in the same boat....I weighed 115 pre pregnancy and now I'm 106 and I can't eat anymore than i already am...Hayden is also milestone waking so these last few nights have been rough but I'm sticking with it and am confident that it will get MUCH better.....hang in there

~Stacy~
__________________

Reply With Quote
  #3  
April 24th, 2008, 10:26 AM
LaLa's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 11,576
I totally empathize. I have had a similar experience both times - more so with my first. I got down to under 110 with my first (NOT a problem this time lol) within 8 weeks of giving birth.

WHat I found helped this time was taking a whole food supplement, instead of prenatals. But definitely take your vitamins religiously. Avoid caffeine, I've noticed it makes me worse, both with weight loss & feeling drained. For some reason I can do tea and the odd soda, but not coffee.

Also - try to eat high protein snacks, particularly in the morning. I've also always done a carnation instant breakfast esp during baby's growth spurts, when it takes the most toll on me.

Try to find some things you can do to ease he burden, we designated baths as daddy's duty, and although it was rough at first, now she automatically associates them with him, and thats "their" thing

I've never managed to get out of bedtime duty though lol.

Good luck, it is temporary I promise!

Lala...
__________________




My BBT Chart





DEBT PAY DOWN!!!
Baby Step #1 DONE ($1k in ER savings!)

<a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/debt/wRzFQue/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">

</a>
Reply With Quote
  #4  
April 24th, 2008, 10:55 AM
JMTSMOMMA's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Manitoba,Canada
Posts: 7,275
Thanks ladies. Deep down I KNOW I won't quit, but some days kwim?
He is such a healthy boy and I know BF has played a huge part in that. Plus we both really do enjoy it.

When I first told friends/family that I planned on EB everyone was so supportive but I did receive a TON of warnings about what a huge commitment it was. Hey that's my middle name! Or so I thought. I had no clue exactly how HUGE they were talking lol!

One day at a time for now I suppose. It's good to know the weight issue isn't totally uncommon. My Mommy friends scoff at me and say they wish they had the same problem. They just don't understand that being too skinny is as unhealthy and tiring as carrying extra weight.

LaLa I will take your nutrition advice and see if that helps. Any recommendations for high protein snacks?

Also bath duties start tonite! Great idea.
__________________


~Sometimes the days seem long, but the years are so very short.~

Reply With Quote
  #5  
April 24th, 2008, 11:45 AM
Kalia20's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: ontario canada
Posts: 5,888
I dont see how bfing is a huge commitment honestly. How hard is it to lift your shirt?? I have been trying to get Corali to take the occasional bottle of BM, and wow what a PITA having to wash and sterilize bottles and nipples all the time!! Wash, sanitize, prepare, refridgerate, heat up with a bowl of hot water, feed the now starving screaming baby, do it over again. FFing moms have to do the frequent shopping trips for more formula, on top of that. Formula is expensive!! Pumping is easy and free. IMO bottle feeding is WAY more of a commitment. (bottle feeding as in FFing, not EBM cause IMO thats less work than getting baby and diaper bag ready and going to the store and emptying my wallet to formula)

And you know what, honestly, I LIKE how Im the only one that can put her to bed at night and Im the only one that can feed her (that includes the rare bottle of breastmilk she takes) Just one of those small things. So much easier just to lift up the shirt. Anytime, anywhere I'll nurse my baby anywhere now, I dont care where I am. Got me thinking, how you gonna warm up a bottle if you are out and about and have a temperature fussy baby? And it would be a PITA to keep the bottle cold in a diaper bag so it doesnt spoil.....oi. AND I love how bfing moms get more sleep!! Im done rambling now, I just love breastfeeding, I could go on forever why I love it and why I feel its not a huge commitment. I hear that all the time too, and I always say its not I have so many untouched cans of formula in the cupboard collecting dust I got at baby showers.

Now theres that BPA (I think thats what it is) ban for bottles now. Just another thing thats a PITA *sigh*
__________________


Reply With Quote
  #6  
April 24th, 2008, 11:58 AM
LaLa's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 11,576
For high protein snacks, some good things are anything with milk (which is high in protein) esp good if your little one has no sensitivities, cheese, chicken, beef, etc. Id make chicken salad & snack on it with crackers or cheese & crackers. Tuna, of course is high in protein. a lot of times id make a really high protein lunch like salad with steak pieces & feta or something. Mmmm, now im craving it lol.

Anything with chicken, beef, cheese, etc will be high in protein. Eat them cold for a snack. Ham cubes & cheese cubes I think I lived off of for the first 6 months lol. could put them in a bowl with some grapes & eat them for days. And esp in the summre when it was hot...

Lala...
__________________




My BBT Chart





DEBT PAY DOWN!!!
Baby Step #1 DONE ($1k in ER savings!)

<a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/debt/wRzFQue/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">

</a>
Reply With Quote
  #7  
April 24th, 2008, 12:07 PM
JMTSMOMMA's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Manitoba,Canada
Posts: 7,275
Never once said I didn't love it....


Thanks La-La these all sound suer easy!
__________________


~Sometimes the days seem long, but the years are so very short.~

Reply With Quote
  #8  
April 24th, 2008, 02:56 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Canada
Posts: 816
It must be hard when you are the one that gives the most comfort. I had the opposite - from day 1 my little guy has been a daddies boy. That was frustrating for the opposite reason - here I am EBF this little guy, and he prefers my husband - pffff. Still to this day!

One thing DH did was always be the first to comfort him at night - so he was used to being with dad. Also, you'll probably be starting solids in a couple of months, so it'll be a very short time before dad can be involved in that, and make that part of his thins too. And then the feeding becomes less frequent, which will also give you a break.

I really like the whole idea of bath time -also story time was DH's favourite thing to do and his 'thing'.

Diet really influences how you feel - have you checked to see whether you at anemic at all? That might be contributing to your exhaustion - and it's possible you might have a bit of the baby blues? Also, if you aren't already, be sure that you get some time to yourself, like even a short walk on your own - that gives you a mental break, and your DH sounds like he's very helpful and that can be part of his role too - helping you take care of yourself.
__________________


Reply With Quote
  #9  
April 24th, 2008, 06:09 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Michigan
Posts: 26,254

I don't understand the weight issues, but I do understand how tiresome it can be when you're baby only wants you. DH left when DD was 2 months old and didn't return until she was 16 months. For that amount of time, I didn't have a choice but to be the only one to take care of her. Once he got back though, she continued to play favorites. It was understandable for a while, but I was hoping she would take to him better and soon I would get a break. He's been back for over 5 months now and she still continues to favor me. The fact that he is gone again for 3 months isn't helping. My best advice is to do what you can to involve daddy. The favortism won't last forever, I promise. Usually it's stages that come and go. Continue to let him try putting him to sleep, especially if you aren't around. It doesn't hurt to try, even if he doesn't take to it for a while.
__________________
Andrea, mom to 3 beautiful girls - Abigail (8) Annabelle (5) and Alexis (3)

Expecting baby #4!



Reply With Quote
  #10  
April 25th, 2008, 05:45 AM
JMTSMOMMA's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Manitoba,Canada
Posts: 7,275
Andrea and poldy thank you for your responses! We tried the Daddy bath time last night and it went very well! Daddy took him straight into the tub with him and it was a big old playfest! A very enjoyable half hour for Mommy as well
I also started adding more protein into my diet and cutting out the small amount of caffeine I was having daily so hopefully those things will help energy wise.

The big challenge will be getting away by myself but DH agrees that we should at least give it a go. I'm going to leave him with some pumped bottles tomorrow and take my first shopping trip alone in 5 months! Kind of excited actually!
__________________


~Sometimes the days seem long, but the years are so very short.~

Reply With Quote
  #11  
April 25th, 2008, 06:24 AM
AndoriaC's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Western Pennsylvania
Posts: 10,199
Our DD loves getting her cereal from DH before bedtime. that is one way we have been able to include him. And I never really thought about it until I read this post, but I have the same issues with weight and BF'ing. It was great to lose all of the preggo weight fast, but I dropped an additional 5 after that. And I'm small - 5' tall and usually about 105, but now hovering right at 100. I'm sure I'll get it back when I'm done bf'ing though!! I'll have to try to eat some better snacks, too.

Good luck! I hope you're able to get through the issues and continue bf'ing!
__________________
<div align="center">




Click For My Digital Scrapbook Blog</div>
Reply With Quote
  #12  
April 25th, 2008, 06:54 AM
JMTSMOMMA's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Manitoba,Canada
Posts: 7,275
We will def be including Daddy at meal times once we introduce solids. That won't be for at least 2 more months at the earliest though. DH and I are both looking forward to that!

It's funny but most people just don't get the weight thing. People automatically assume I am dieting or exercising like crazy. I even got the eye roll from an acquaintance as if she didn't believe me when I said I wasn't!


Anyway I had a surprise visit from AF this morning so I am thinking that is what all of this uncertainty may be about? Although I am NOT happy to see her I think it explains a little bit about the emotional part of how I've been feeling this week at least!
__________________


~Sometimes the days seem long, but the years are so very short.~

Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 08:54 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0