[The-Princess]

When I found out I was pregnant, the very first decision I made was to breastfeed. I had breastfed my son for two months, and wanted to continue so badly but got mixed up when I started supplimenting formula for school, and ended up totally formula feeding. It broke my heart because I loved breastfeeding. So my entire pregnancy I was reading up on how best to handle breastfeeding, benefits, etc. I would even sit and read information to Nick about all of this and how excited I was.

Now it seems like every other word out of his mouth is about how I should switch to formula feeding. It breaks my heart because I love breastfeeding and he's doing SO well (He JUST turned 3 weeks and is already almost two pounds over his birthweight) I understand that he wants to feed him or be able to take him out without having to warn me, but can't he just understand that this is what I want and it is obviously great for Brig? Another issue is that when I had to start putting Bodhi on formula, it was an extremely painful process for both of us. It took us 4 weeks of projectile vomiting, extreme gassiness, and non-stop crying to find the right formula. I don't want to go through that again if I don't have to!!

It's also hugely scary, because he's SO determined to make me switch, I'm terrified that he'll do it behind my back. I'm literally scared to leave Brig with him because I don't want him giving him formula. At one point he even (joked?) about leaving me if I wouldn't switch to formula. It really hurts that he can't see how good this is for Brig and for me, and that he's being so selfish. As I'm writing this, I just want to sob because I'm so upset. I don't really know what advice to ask for or what to do...

[isolt]

I don't know what to say. It is great that your SO wants to help so badly. I wish mine was that enthusiastic. All you can do is explain the benefits of breastfeeding and how much it means to you. Maybe you can remind him how hard formula feeding was the first time and all the trouble you had.

I hope that he doesn't go behind your back. good luck mama

[Mama.Angie]

It must be hard to have to be fought against doing something so natural... I'm sorry this is going on in your life right now when what you really need is lots of support.

The only advice I can think of is...

1. Could you print out a bunch of reasons why breastfeeding is so god for you and your son and give it to your SO? Is he receptive to that sort of thing?

2. Maybe schedule an appointment with a lactation consultant that you and your SO could go to together and have someone else explain to you and him the benefits? Would he go for that?

3. Maybe if nothing else works he would consider you pumping and giving your son BM in bottles? That way at the very least he is getting the BM?

I hope you work something out either way you go!

[ShanMarie]

I also would suggest pumping some so he could help feed him too. That way he wouldnt feel so left out. And honestly, if he wants to leave you over you breastfeeding, let him. You know you are doing what is BEST for your baby and for you so if he wants to be so childish and do something like that, then just let him. Do you have other family that can watch the baby so you dont have to worry about him going behind your back and feeding him formula?