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My friend Erica died in the Colorado ski trip bus crash in January. I've known her since the 3rd grade, and I miss her. I've been okay for awhile now... we had grown apart for about 2 years before her death, and I was more in mourning for letting that happen than I was for losing her. I wish I had reconnected with her. We went to the same high school, but we didn't have any classes together and we only rarely communicated through myspace. I regret that so much... she was an amazing girl. She literally always had a smile one her face, and she was friends with EVERYONE, seriously. Her funeral was packed with people... I think just about everyone at the school tried to come. Certainly a lot of them, at least.
I haven't thought about her much lately. But tonight I've been bawling my eyes out, thinking about her. Missing her. Wishing I'd picked up the phone and called her more often. I guess because it's 9/11, and remembering this day 7 years ago. We were in the same 5th grade class, so I can't remember this day without remembering her. I remember hugging her because her uncle worked at the WTC. And I remember crying with her when her mom called to say he was ok.
I don't know. Tonight has me thinking about all the crappy things humans do to each other... and how there's already so much grief in the world, with accidents and disasters taking sweet girls like Erica from us. Why do we add to it?
I'm so sorry, It makes it even harder when all of a sudden it hits you like that. I've had those days too and sometimes I don't realize WHAT has me sooooo down, and then I realize and I just fall apart.