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Where do I belong?


Forum: Grief and Loss

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  • 10 Post By zkat

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  #1  
January 26th, 2013, 01:25 AM
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 107
I don't know where I belong. Loss of a child? Stillbirth? Miscarriage/pregnancy loss. Let me tell you my story, you can decide where I belong.

I have 8 children who walk this Earth with me. I've had four miscarriages - one before I became a mummy and three since my last baby was born. I gave birth to 8 healthy babies in a row.

I got pregnant and was due June 25th. I was starting to enjoy the pregnancy, starting to hope and believe I would give birth to another child. Due to one thing and another, I didn't get my first scan until 17+6 weeks (January 21st). To my absolute shock we discovered there were two babies in there! Wow!

It all ended just 3 days later, January 24th. I can't go into details of what happened, it's just too painful to write. But my sweet babies, Ruby Florence and Harry Arthur were born at 18+2. They were both alive when they were born. I know this. Ruby wrapped her hand around my finger and Harry squirmed. I saw him. I truly did. They were alive.

It's been just 2 days since they passed and I don't know what to do. I want to sleep but I can't. I don't want to be alone but I don't want anybody around me. I want to die to be with my babies but I have 8 children who need me.

So where do I belong? Loss of a child? They were born alive. Stillbirth? They were born alive. Pregnancy loss? I guess this is where I belong but I gave birth to them.
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  #3  
January 27th, 2013, 04:41 PM
zkat's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 3,743
In the June DDC you said Harry grabbed your finger. Did your missing husband ever show up?

Please do not toy with these ladies and their emotions They have been through so much. I didn't say anything in the DDC, but I draw the line on you posting this here. Everyone here has had real losses and the pain and grief is very real and very raw.
You have been reported to the mods.
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  #4  
January 28th, 2013, 07:54 AM
Pretty_N_Ink's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Arizona
Posts: 726
I truly hope that this isnt a "fairytale".
Having lost an infant I would give anything to not know that pain as would many others. Please dont invent stories and thank God you havent had to experience something so tragic.
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RIP Bristol Grace 10/28/12-11/19/12
You're always in our hearts sweet girl
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