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Ya know, there was about a year that I was completely gaga about getting married. It kind of hit me out of no where. I guess it didn't help that most of my friend were getting married around the same time and I had been together with my SO longer than all of them put together. But, after a while I just realized that it really isn't that big of a deal to me. Yes, it's something I'd like to do in the future, but I'm not rushing into anything just because we're engaged. The reality is that emotionally and spiritually, we already are married. Having a little document and little benefits isn't what makes it for me.
And on the same vein, I don't really understand how people can get so anal about their weddings. I know people who're having break downs just planning for it! I know when I have mine, it'll be a small group of people and just relaxing. I think that's the way it should be.
Honestly I was but after being married for 3 years if I could go back I wouldn't get married. But I'd have to because he's in the military and in order to move and live together it's easier to be married.
J Married to D 08.21.2009
Bonus Mama to R (14) and M (7)
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When I look back now, I feel like I rushed things because of what I wanted out of my life (man, kids, house). At the time, I didn't think that we were rushing, and I thought that getting married made the most sense because I felt like I was in love (and I was really baby fevered). I didn't go crazy planning it, and we only spent around $500 total on the whole wedding. But I just don't really feel like DH is who I was supposed to have married--at least not so soon. Proving my commitment to someone IS very important to me, but if DH and I ever separate for some reason, I will be a lot more hesitant to be bound to someone by paper.
I'm not married, but Lauriel and I are planning on it. I think if I'm really honest to myself, getting married IS important, but it isn't the be all... I could quite happily live the rest of my life living AS wife and wife.. but if I had a choice, I would sooner get married
I've never been a big marriage girl. I didn't play wedding when I was growing up, none of my Barbies had weddings (they lived together in a really cool loft), it just never appealed much to me. Even as my friends started getting married, didn't hold a lot of intreast for me. I have however been a bridesmaid more times then I care to count, so I've learned what to do, and what not to do. First, lower your expectations. Yes, problems will arise, but it's all ok as long there are no major fires and you wind up married at the end of it all. Second, your marriage is for a lifetime, your wedding is for one day. Guess which one really deserves your time and energy?
DP and I have talked about. She wants to married, eventually. I'm fine with us living in sin. We negotiated, once CA gets its head out of its butt and re-legalizes it, we'll talk about getting hitched. Ok, I'll probably pop the question to her because I know it's important to her.