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  #1  
May 11th, 2009, 03:48 PM
nina9809's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I never knew this board existed until someone just linked me over here. I feel like this is a good place to post my story to help out others in the same position. I am going to copy and paste a lot of my story from other boards.....

My name is Nina (28) and my SO is Norm (40) and I got my BFP on CD38 after getting a BFN on CD31. This was our 2nd cycle TTC.

Last week I a really bad pain in my lower right abdomen. After about 2 hours or so I decided to call the nurse as I just wasn't going away and I was really uncomfortable. They advised me to go to the ER to get checked out.

At the ER they took 5 vials of blood and gave me an IV with saline solution and asked if I wanted morphine (which I refused). After prodding and poking me a lot they took me into get an ultrasound.

The ultrasound found nothing in my uterus and something (they think probably some cysts) by my right ovary. Of course, they are worried that the baby might be in the ovary but they really couldn't find it. She didn't seem worried about the cysts at all.

My blood tests came back and all were fine but my HCG levels were only 400 so she told me that I am pregant but it is much earlier than I thought. She says if I am less than 4 weeks pregnant they can't find the baby with the ultasound.

After the ultrasound I used the restroom and the pain went away so I am thinking that it really was some strange stuck gas pains. Obviously the main worry now is where the baby is going to show up.

It is possible, and she was leaning towards this (although I wonder if that was just to be nice) that the baby will just show up soon in the uterus when it is big enough to see. The other very real possibility is that the baby will show up in the ovary or in the tube.

Since the baby is so small that we can't find it, if it does show up in the wrong place, I should be able to take a drug to induce miscarriage rather than have an emergency operation which is what I was most scared of when I went in yesterday (loosing a tube or something).

Of course, the other option that she didn't mention is that maybe I am miscarrying naturally which in my opionion would be a good reason why my HCG levels are so low. I am not bleeding at this time though.

She also did tell me that if I do start bleeding, I need to go back to the emergency room as I have a negative blood type and if the baby has a positive blood type, there could be problems.

I go back to get my blood taken tomorrow to see if my levels really are increasing and if they are, then hopefully for another ultrasound on Friday.

While unlikely it is completely possible that I just ovulated really late (I did get a negative test on CD31) and that it only impanted let's say the day before I get my BFP which was 7 days ago (yesterday). If this was the case and lets say my HCG levels were only 10 when I got my BFP - then it is possible that my HCG levels are only at 400 now. So, let's go with that. Can everyone cross their fingers for me?

Baby, please be in the right place, please be in right place, please be okay, please.

Now I play a waiting game and I'm scared.

Update: I went in to get my blood taken again; this time they took three vials, one of which was really big and they filled them all to the top.

I went in later that day to see a doctor and she told me that my numbers were not doubling properly so it was very unlikely that it is a viable pregnancy. She gave me another ultrasound and said that the cyst was looking a little worse and she is a little worried that it might burst so I must not do any strenuous exercise or have sex!

She told me that my options are to take a drug to induce miscarriage as it is very likely that I have an ectopic pregnancy (she thinks it is in my ovary with the cyst…. Or maybe she thinks it is the cyst, I don’t know). She said the drug is a really hectic drug and they had to test my liver and kidney functions fully before I took it (which is why they had taken so much blood yesterday). She told me that since I really wanted a pregnancy, she would give me one more day and one more ultrasound before taking steps.

She also told me that I have a very rare blood type: AB negative – which means if and when I start bleeding I have to have an injection really quite urgently otherwise my body my fight off the baby and continue to do so in the future resulting in numerous miscarriages. So, I NEED this injection to stop this from happening.

So, last night I went home and talked to my SO and kind of freaked out a bit. The doctor really scared me with the possibility of bursting the cyst and the scare of loosing my ovary. Of course that is what I am really worrying about…. My ovary. So I have decided that it is better that I just take the drug asap and stop this pregnancy in the hope that it will save my ovary and that I will not need surgery.

I am going back in for another ultrasound today at 11.10am but they won’t gave me the results for a few hours after that. I think I am going to set up an appointment in the afternoon to get this drug and to get things moving. The weekend is coming up so I can’t afford to wait much longer. I will update you further when I know more. This is all very sad for me. I am okay with loosing the baby; I am. I am sad but okay. I just NEED my ovary to be okay. Otherwise I will not be okay.

Update: So I went in for the ultrasound on Friday with a bladder that was way too full; it was horrid - and she told me I didn't need it that full!

The ulrasound went okay, definately no baby in my uterus and still no sign of the baby elsewhere. The cyst caused some interest.... after the lady looking at it for ages, she got the radiologist to come in and take a look himself. He didn't seem to bothered by it though which was good.

The nurse called me later with the results from the ultrasound, which in my opinion, sounded fine and I was hoping she was going to my restrictions off (no sex, no yoga etc) but she told me the doctor was still really worried that the cyst might rupture so I am still on restriction.

We arranged for me to go in to take the injections 45 minutes later. I had read a lot of scary things about it so I was really not looking forward to it.

When I got there they gave me three injections, one in my arm for the negative blood type thing and then one in EACH arse cheek containing the horrid drug. I left with a perscription for anti-nausea.

I physically feel fine. The drug has not made me feel ill in any way. I feel completely normal. It makes me worry slightly that maybe it isn't working. I had a great birthday and so did my SO so my weekend went well. I am going to go out to sushi tonight to make myself feel better about loosing the baby (or something like that).

I feel a little sad, but I'm okay. I am still not bleeding; they said it would take a few days. I am going back in to get more blood tests twice this week to make sure that the drug is working and that my HCG levels are decreasing. I am not allowed to eat a big long list of things that contain folic acid as folic acid stops the drug from working. Ironic really. I have been faithfully taking my vitamins for many many months and now I have to stop taking them.

I am also a little worried how long this drug is going to be in my system killing babies. When I used to be on Depo they injected it into the same muscle and it worked for at least 3 months. I wonder when I am going to be able to start TTC again. Sigh. Right now, I am not even allowed to have sex!! I hope the cyst goes away with the baby. x
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  #2  
May 15th, 2009, 10:22 AM
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Update: F**K

So, as you all know I had the Methotrexate injection last Friday. I went in for blood work on Monday and my levels rose again to 1561. They told me that levels often rise before decreasing and I shouldn't worry about it. They has been 400, then 600 and then days later 1561.

Yesterday I went in for more blood work. The nurse called me this morning early to tell me my levels were still increasing and I need to come in for an ultrasound asap - she is going to call me back with an appointment before 12:30pm.

This is getting really scary. I've out on weight, my boobs are huge. They still don't know where the baby is. Clearly I am immune to toxic drugs. This really isn't going well. I'll give another update later on if people are still interested in my story.
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  #3  
May 15th, 2009, 02:08 PM
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Update: Cyst on right ovary has gone. Now I have a cyst on left ovary. Still no baby anywhere. Going in for doctor appointment at 2:15pm; probably to get another Methotrexate injection…. but I don’t know for sure!
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  #4  
May 18th, 2009, 09:50 AM
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UPDATE: So, I went in on Friday to get the ultrasound results and see the doctor, a specialist this time (as he was the only one in the office). He informed me (and showed me on the screen) that it seems I have been confused. The cyst is, and has always been, on the left and is nothing to worry about at all. He told me that the right ovary is the one they are worrying about, and has always been the one they have worried about. What it is that they see that makes them worried is not clear as they do not seem to be certain that it is the baby.

He told me that the Methotrexate had not worked as my number are still increasing (1910 on Thursday of last week) and that we needed to give it to me again. He also said that he thinks that we should do one more test that day to check to see if the lining of my uterus has ever held the fetus. The reason for doing this test would be that if it had been there then we would have nothing else to worry about and I would be completely off the hook. He did tell me that it was unlikely but would be worth knowing just in case it was the case. I asked him what it would feel like and he told me that I would feel some cramping. I decided that I could handle some cramping and said yes to the test. I wish I had said no!!!!

Let me tell you…. I don’t think things should EVER go the wrong direction ANYWHERE. OMG. He stuck something up my cervix into my uterus and collected some of the lining. I did get to see my cervix with a mirror which was rather fascinating. Some cramping didn’t even begin to cover what I felt. I don’t think my cervix could have been more closed. It was HORRIBLE. Once it was over I still had “some cramping” all evening where I felt like my uterus was going to fall out.

I have felt fine since then though. I have been bleeding a very small amount since the procedure, which I imagine is to be expected. I do not feel like it is my period arriving as it is so light. Sometimes I have nothing then a tiny bit on a panty liner.

I then went to give more blood and they took tons again to do all the liver and kidney tests etc. again. Funny that this time they did them AFTER giving me the Methotrexate injection again (since they are supposed to do it before to make sure that you can handle it).

I go back today to see the doctor again and to get my test results. I really want to be given the all clear so that I can go to yoga again and start having sex! I am missing both tremendously! LOL!

UPDATE: So, I went in on Friday to get the ultrasound results and see the doctor, a specialist this time (as he was the only one in the office). He informed me (and showed me on the screen) that it seems I have been confused. The cyst is, and has always been, on the left and is nothing to worry about at all. He told me that the right ovary is the one they are worrying about, and has always been the one they have worried about. What it is that they see that makes them worried is not clear as they do not seem to be certain that it is the baby.

He told me that the Methotrexate had not worked as my number are still increasing (1910 on Thursday of last week) and that we needed to give it to me again. He also said that he thinks that we should do one more test that day to check to see if the lining of my uterus has ever held the fetus. The reason for doing this test would be that if it had been there then we would have nothing else to worry about and I would be completely off the hook. He did tell me that it was unlikely but would be worth knowing just in case it was the case. I asked him what it would feel like and he told me that I would feel some cramping. I decided that I could handle some cramping and said yes to the test. I wish I had said no!!!!

Let me tell you…. I don’t think things should EVER go the wrong direction ANYWHERE. OMG. He stuck something up my cervix into my uterus and collected some of the lining. I did get to see my cervix with a mirror which was rather fascinating. Some cramping didn’t even begin to cover what I felt. I don’t think my cervix could have been more closed. It was HORRIBLE. Once it was over I still had “some cramping” all evening where I felt like my uterus was going to fall out.

I have felt fine since then though. I have been bleeding a very small amount since the procedure, which I imagine is to be expected. I do not feel like it is my period arriving as it is so light. Sometimes I have nothing then a tiny bit on a panty liner.

I then went to give more blood and they took tons again to do all the liver and kidney tests etc. again. Funny that this time they did them AFTER giving me the Methotrexate injection again (since they are supposed to do it before to make sure that you can handle it).

I go back today to see the doctor again and to get my test results. I really want to be given the all clear so that I can go to yoga again and start having sex! I am missing both tremendously! LOL!
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  #5  
May 18th, 2009, 11:27 AM
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(((HUGS))) This whole thing is just terible! I am sorry you are loosing your baby. I am sorry they don't know where your baby even is!?!?! I am sorry you are being poked and proded and having your uterus "sampled". You are so brave!

I had an ectopic loss in Oct 07...my story is down a little on this board. Please PM me if you need anything!
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  #6  
May 19th, 2009, 10:02 AM
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Update: I went to see the doctor again yesterday to answer all my questions and I know think that I understand. I was told that the test came back from the uterus lining and there had never been a baby in my uterus which means it definitely was ectopic. My numbers are now going down and went down again yesterday. On 5/14 they hit a high of 1910 and on 5/15 they were 1748 and yesterday 5/18 they were 1502.

She said that once my numbers are back down to below 10 everything will be okay again and my body should start ovulating again. She also said I may or may not bleed this out. She is not sure how long it will take to get my levels back down to 0, it could be a week, it could be 6 weeks.

After going in for another blood test on Thursday I should know if it is safe for me to have sex and do yoga! Hopefully I will get those results on Friday. I then have to go in for weekly blood tests until my numbers are back below 10.

Last night I had some more pain and although I was sure it was my stomach creating the pain rather than my uterus I still got a bit freaked out. No one would answer their phones and I decided I wanted to go to the ER rather than risk it. Eventually my SO arrived home to me in tears…. And took me to the ER. I sat outside for about 40 mins before things got a little better and I ended up going home. My stomach is still hurting – I’m really not sure what is going on with it. Last night was much worse…. Now it just hurts if I move it or prod it. Since the numbers are going down, I really think everything should be okay.

Quote:
Originally Posted by *TheyCallMeMommy* View Post
(((HUGS))) This whole thing is just terible! I am sorry you are loosing your baby. I am sorry they don't know where your baby even is!?!?! I am sorry you are being poked and proded and having your uterus "sampled". You are so brave!

I had an ectopic loss in Oct 07...my story is down a little on this board. Please PM me if you need anything!
Thank you. x
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  #7  
May 19th, 2009, 10:28 AM
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I am so sorry you are going through this and that it's not even resolving quickly... being dragged out is just terrible. I hope your numbers continue to go down.
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  #8  
May 19th, 2009, 10:36 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lunarmagic View Post
I am so sorry you are going through this and that it's not even resolving quickly... being dragged out is just terrible. I hope your numbers continue to go down.
Nice to hear from you.... It's so weird, I got onto your site one day and read your story.... i then read about your ectopic and it was becuase of you that I worried when I had pain and ended up going to the ER and finding that mine was ectopic too! I read your website every day now. You are are amazing. x
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  #9  
May 19th, 2009, 10:39 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nina9809 View Post
Nice to hear from you.... It's so weird, I got onto your site one day and read your story.... i then read about your ectopic and it was becuase of you that I worried when I had pain and ended up going to the ER and finding that mine was ectopic too! I read your website every day now. You are are amazing. x
Oh, thank you. *blush* It certainly is serendipitous that you read about my ectopic right before yours. I'm really glad you got to the ER when you did!
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  #10  
May 19th, 2009, 10:42 PM
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Nina,
I just went through a very similar story. I didn't take any of the Methotrexate since my numbers were falling the whole time. However I did have a d&c with no tissue found in the uterus. The whole thing lasted over two weeks with me having continued soreness/pain/tenderness in the lower left side where they "thought" my ectopic may be in my left tube. Since my numbers were declining they were just watching them go to hopefully zero and then it would supposedly be resolved. But i continued to have pain, tenderness, etc. that I was just putting up with. Meanwhile I had two episodes of horrific pain that seemed to start with some uterine cramping that felt like nothing more than menstrual pain but quickly escalated to the worst pain I have ever had that lasted approx. an hour and then began to subside. At the second episode I went to the ER (went for first also but they just did ultrasounds again inconclusive and gave me morphine and sent me to be "monitored" by my doctor) and told them to call my doctor to do the exploratory surgery I was trying to avoid as I just knew something was really wrong.

That was early yesterday morning and they went in and found my left tube in horrible shape, not erupted but horribly distended with the ectopic still in it and it was in such bad shape they took it out immediately. They then told my husband (and me later when I woke up) that "wow she must have a very high pain tolerance as her tube was in such bad shape that must have been horribly painful." Uh yeah hello I know but I was scared that everyone would think I was being a hyperchondriac so I was just trying to deal with it.

I'm not writing this to try and scare you but if you are still feeling pain like you are and your numbers have fallen, I would insist on your doctors doing something more. My surgery was laproscopic and recovery frankly has been less painful than my ectopic was. I just really feel that maybe if they had done the surgery earlier they could have saved my tube.

I wish you the best and hope that you are already on your way to recovery but please if you are still in pain, be very vocal and insistent with your doctors. Good luck to you.
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  #11  
May 20th, 2009, 09:02 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by phoebeb View Post
Nina,
I just went through a very similar story. I didn't take any of the Methotrexate since my numbers were falling the whole time. However I did have a d&c with no tissue found in the uterus. The whole thing lasted over two weeks with me having continued soreness/pain/tenderness in the lower left side where they "thought" my ectopic may be in my left tube. Since my numbers were declining they were just watching them go to hopefully zero and then it would supposedly be resolved. But i continued to have pain, tenderness, etc. that I was just putting up with. Meanwhile I had two episodes of horrific pain that seemed to start with some uterine cramping that felt like nothing more than menstrual pain but quickly escalated to the worst pain I have ever had that lasted approx. an hour and then began to subside. At the second episode I went to the ER (went for first also but they just did ultrasounds again inconclusive and gave me morphine and sent me to be "monitored" by my doctor) and told them to call my doctor to do the exploratory surgery I was trying to avoid as I just knew something was really wrong.

That was early yesterday morning and they went in and found my left tube in horrible shape, not erupted but horribly distended with the ectopic still in it and it was in such bad shape they took it out immediately. They then told my husband (and me later when I woke up) that "wow she must have a very high pain tolerance as her tube was in such bad shape that must have been horribly painful." Uh yeah hello I know but I was scared that everyone would think I was being a hyperchondriac so I was just trying to deal with it.

I'm not writing this to try and scare you but if you are still feeling pain like you are and your numbers have fallen, I would insist on your doctors doing something more. My surgery was laproscopic and recovery frankly has been less painful than my ectopic was. I just really feel that maybe if they had done the surgery earlier they could have saved my tube.

I wish you the best and hope that you are already on your way to recovery but please if you are still in pain, be very vocal and insistent with your doctors. Good luck to you.
Wow - that sounds really scary. Thanks for your story. I'm feeling much better now.
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  #12  
May 20th, 2009, 11:43 AM
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I am glad you are feeling better....BUT...if you are having pain you need to be seen. I had minimal pain with my ectopic but the pain I did have was assocaited with internal bleeding!

This is a horrible situation to be in but you need to think about your health.
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  #13  
May 22nd, 2009, 10:20 AM
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Update: My blood test from yesterday (05/21) showed that my numbers are now at 1176. The stupid nurse that informed me of this asked a new doctor I haven't seen before and I was told that I am not able to have sex or do yoga until my numbers are less than 5. This can't be right. I simply cannot cope without these things for that long. I have emailed my actual doctor to see if she gives me a more satisfying answer. She had implied that it would be okay for me now.
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  #14  
May 28th, 2009, 12:37 PM
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UPDATE: I had my bloodwork done again today (1 week after the last time) and my numbers are now 381. This is some serious progress. But, I will not be officially allowed to have sex or do yoga until they are below 5. I wonder how much longer!
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  #15  
May 28th, 2009, 07:38 PM
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Well that is good!!! I'm glad you posted, I've been wondering how you were doing. Hope they keep going down at a good rate.
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  #16  
June 4th, 2009, 02:11 PM
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UPDATE: I think I am going to update this thread until the end so that people who read it will know the whole process, including how long it took to actually fix itself. My numbers today are 72, still not allowed sex or yoga. I am still not bleeding. I am going on vacation tomorrow and will not be back for two weeks so will not get my blood tested again until i get back. Hopefully my FINAL update will be when I get back!!
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  #17  
June 4th, 2009, 05:34 PM
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Ugh, this is just dragging out so long!!
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  #18  
June 4th, 2009, 05:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lunarmagic View Post
Ugh, this is just dragging out so long!!
Tell me about it! Are my numbers ever going to be below 5?? lol What happens if they drop until 6 and then never go any lower? Oh my goodness! No sex and no yoga is driving me insane.
I'm excited for you though; been reading your blog. I am going on vacation tomorrow - I hope to hear good news from you when I get back. x
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  #19  
June 22nd, 2009, 02:08 PM
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FINAL UPDATE: AF finally visited while I was on vacation. I came back yesterday and today got my final blood test (for now) and my numbers are finally less than 5! Woo Hoo! Back to sex and yoga. I am relieved!!
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  #20  
June 22nd, 2009, 02:10 PM
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FINAL UPDATE: AF finally visited while I was on vacation. I came back yesterday and today got my final blood test (for now) and my numbers are finally less than 5! Woo Hoo! Back to sex and yoga. I am relieved!!
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