We pride ourselves on having the friendliest
and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment
for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers.
If you have any problems registering please drop an email to email@example.com.
Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!
I know I am not going to homeschool now taht my girls fell in love witha new Private school (which we are fully enrolled ofr fall and I am LOVING the people and the communication and hope it will stay positive), but you said I could come chat whenever...so I need to vent and I know you ladies will understand my frustrations with our current private school.
Everyday our girls are to have an agenda signed. It says I looked at their homework assignment and I am aware of anything written. Well, I am a busy mom. This week was Stanford Acheivement tests..thus no homework. I looked in their bags but we were out of our routine of do the homework, sign the book, load everything back in the bag. So, today I forgot to sign one of the agendas (I got the other one!). Kacey (she is six) comes home and is upset with me. Turns out she had to miss indoor recess and spend the whole time with her head down on her desk while everyone played around her. I equate this not only to a punishment, but a public shaming. She said it was so embarrassing. Poor kid I feel really bad that I forgot, but when I looked just now to see what I had missed yesterday that was important and resulted in her being punished...the agenda says "Enjoy the Sunshine." SERIOUSLY!!!! Nothing important that I needed to see, nothing that needed filled out and returned, nothing but a little note from teh teacher reminding my kid have a good afternoon. I was FURIOUS! This is the third time she has been punished for me forgetting...180 days I forgot 3 times...one of those times she returned the finished homework assignment I just forgot to sign that it was done...it was OBVIOUSLY done...she turned it in!!!! That time she had to stand in one spto during recess. Our older kid gets a card turned. One card turn is equivalent to a verbal warning, a friendly "try to remember tonight." I am FINE with that. Verbal warning...total sense!! Am I totally over reacting to the way the younger teacher is handling this? I mean, my momma bear claws came out just now when I saw the agenda. Should I say something? Let it go? I just don't know what to do. I told my friend I should sign the agenda for every day through the end of the school year but that might be a little obnoxious, lol. Seriously...am I over reacting? I HATE THIS SCHOOL...I am so looking forward to next years new school...even if it is a 20 minute further drive away than this one.
__________________ ~Keri~ I love my girls!
I'd be livid too. I would also have a chat with that teacher, if not face to face, then in writing. Especially if your other daughter(s) don't have the same policy, even in the same school. All that does is teach inconsistency and cause the children to always question "what will happen if". Not a good thing, imo. I know there have to be consequences when we don't do as we're told, of course. But the punishment ought to fit the crime. That's a tad bit harsh, imo. Not like the poor lil thing was being bad or something. Or forgot something that was super super important. I guess I'd think differently if it were a real assignment but "enjoy the sunshine" is not an assignment, lol.
The ps here-and this is one of the only things I actually like about it, have a "district wide" policy as far as discipline is concerned. Now obviously when they hit middle school and older the consequences change, but even then the policy remains district wide. But for the k-6 kids(elementary and intermediate schools) the policy stays the same regardless of teachers' opinions. They use a color system. Everyday your clip(aka clothespin with your name on it) starts off on the green spot(most teachers have a big wheel shaped thing, easy to carry around and still hold all clips, some use a square one though). One verbal warning and you're on yellow.(it actually usually takes something more than a verbal warning, depending on the "incident" they're kinda lax on that first one, lol). Then beyond that they also have blue and red(they used to have purple as well but dropped it this past year). No matter what school you go to, or your age, k-6, your consequence and expectations are all the same. Any teacher that deviates has a lot of explaining to do. They won't think twice about punishing a teacher who adopts his or her own "policy" if it goes against the core one already in place(sometimes adding *to the policy doesn't get frowned upon, but changing it, does). They do this specifically so that if/when a child is in a new class/school/grade they know in advance what to expect. They know the kids, district wide, will know the consequences and "what happens if" at all times. Granted they started adopting this policy with the new schools they are building now(they began this at least a good 5 years ago, they are building a campus style k-6 elementary buildings setup). So that was the driving force, since eventually all district littles would be in the same area. It helps to have one set of rules for everyone. Obviously teachers can have their own rules for their classrooms, but the core discipline policy remains the same. They have certain policies to follow themselves-the teachers that is. Like for certain instances such and such *must be done, and in other instances they are not allowed to do this or that. The teachers have their own discipline rules to follow. I kinda find it somewhat comical, but I understand completely why they do, and I am GLAD that's one thing the district will step in on if needed. Teacher's aren't given a pat on the shoulder for being in a crabby mood and perhaps too harsh on a kiddo.
We only had to deal with it once, thankfully. It ended up getting my daughter out of that classroom and at the end of the year that teacher was fired, for multiple incidents and complaints. Not let go, fired, and it was put in her records why. She had no qualms being way too harsh, loud, obnoxious, bossy(and I don't mean in a "I am your teacher you need to listen" sort of way, more a "I'm big, you're little. deal with it" sort of way). She was just downright mean, and clearly had gone past the point of no return. I'm glad to see she was never hired for a teaching position again. I know she did try to apply for teaching positions. But now she works at a store not too far from here.
I'm sorry you have to deal with this. And I'm especially sorry for your daughter. IMO this teacher is going way to far. I understand using recess time to complete a required assignment, but singling her out like that because she didn't get an unnecessary signature from you is rediculous.
Since it sounds like its not a school wide problem, just an issue with this one teacher, I would go to the principle. Make sure he/she is aware of the issue and express your concern. It's possible the principle doesn't know this is happening and would put a stop to it if they knew.
Good luck with the rest of the year and with the new school next year.
As a teacher myself, I would never, ever do that, nor would it be acceptable. Yes, sometimes kids miss out on some recess time (but I always let them have at least 5 monutes out side to run and go to toilet).
The school should have a Behaviour Management policy that you should be able to access. In no way should Shaming be allowable - it is NOT best practice.
Speak to the principal.
Liz (30), mum to Mia (5) and Aiden (3)
Sorry I did not respond sooner ladies...it was a loooooong weekend around here. Thanks for your support, I appreciate it!! I will ask the teacher about the policy and then talk the the principal if needed. I just think it is way too over the top for a classroom full of 6/7 year olds. I will find out what the deal is. Thanks again...you made me feel much better...I was beginning to think it was just the mama bear in me protecting my baby (thus sometimes over reacting). But it si a few days later and it still upsets me how it was handled...oh...and I remembered to 'do my homework' and sign her agenda today before she left for school!!! I know how important my initials are now...even though the homework was only "enjoy the weekend", lol.
__________________ ~Keri~ I love my girls!