[Frackel]

Apparently, this is what mainstream schools are for these days.
Sigh.

A mom was having issues with 10th grade girls being, well, catty, rude, and everything else girls of that age can be(not all are of course). My response "All the more reason to homeschool. Kids these days can be beyond utterly cruel". Simple reply, right? Not at all insulting, or suggesting school isn't an option.

What's it lead to?

"I do not believe in home schooling, you can not shelter a child forever, and being in mainstream school will teach them the coping skills to become an adult. As long as your a parent that pays attention and talks to your child you can keep an eye on situations and only intervene when absolutely needed."

Hmmmmm, so THAT'S what my kids are missing, coping skills. Here I thought school was for far more than that, like, perhaps an education.
Ok, I do agree with her on some points, because I do believe being an attentive parent is vitally important no matter where your child gets his or her education. Still, come on now.

This isn't the first time she's said something like that. She has idiot friends who have said worse. Recently I came back into contact with a sister I haven't spoken to in years, who also happens to be friends with this person. She's not likely to have nice things to say about that comment, lol(my sister is not soft spoken, and apparently is also homeschooling, which I did not know until recently)

This is just one of the million things I'm sure we've all read, seen, heard, whatever have you. I just find it utterly hilarious. Of course part of the problem is that this person is someone who struggled throughout school, failed most classes, was held back a few times and eventually dropped out. Her child is struggling with all of the same things she used to DO to others in school.

I can't help but laugh, and shake my head. Ignorance breeds ignorance.

[in_mommy]

Dont forget bullying. They need to learn to deal with that too. :/ Some people geesh....

[Irish_Wristwatch]

thats silly! I actually read an article once that said homeschooled kids are actually better socialized and thus better adjusted adults because they are out in the world socializing with all sorts of different people of different ages ect instead of stuck in a room for 8 hours a day with kids the same age as them.

I do not need to subject my children to bullying behavior to teach them how to cope with people!

[BensMom]

When you're bullied in school, nothing happens. When you're bullied as an adult, you file charges and get the idiot put in jail. Adults don't tolerate that sort of behavior, so why should children? If anything, it wears you down so that you're more likely to tolerate it and not recognize it as an adult!

[Frackel]

I must remember to bully my children every day, so they learn to cope.
YAY a new subject for the curriculum.

My kids are very much versed on how to deal with bullying, and were long before they actually started school. You most definitely do not need school for this. In fact if you wait until it happens, I think you're doing your child a disservice.

But I can't really expect much from someone who used to both verbally and physically assault people in school, I suppose. It's just funny, yet sad, that so many have an opinion similar to this one.

[2pinks&ablue]

I've heard that one before too- a friend's sister has that opinion. Of course this is a woman who has no kids, and doesn't intend to. My response? "So, as long as I abuse my children daily, they won't miss out on that benefit of public school?"

[Trinity82]

wow.. sad, and what do these people say about cases like "Phoebe Prince" where they commit suicide after being attacked by others relentlessly at school? I am sorry, I don't buy the coping skills bull shart. One of the things that I am working on with my son, whom at this point I am sure may be a little aspergers (misdiagnosed as adhd) is how to respond to certain things.. He has a tendency to shut down when he starts to feel angry about something. Which school has taught him, shutting down is not the answer. The school really had it out for him, to the point where if anything was wrong he was told to just go sit and be quiet, so of course when they would call me and say "Andrew isn't talking to anyone and we need to know what happened to this other kid with a bully today" I kinda told them in a not so polite manner that they did that to themselves..

I actually had to spend 30 mins just to get him to open up and tell me when he was mad on easter sunday.. and it was all for some little thing that we worked through and I had him think of ways to prevent him from feeling this way in the future..

What class at school teaches that? or any kind of coping skills? Ignoring a bully or just taking it isn't coping it is deflating.... I remember feeling worthless in school, I wouldn't go back there if someone paid me.. and it just keeps getting worse, I hear things and want to protest in front of the school!

[The Studious Mrs P.]

I believe it was someone here that originally posted the link to this great article: No Thank You, We Don't Believe in Socialization.

[Frackel]

We used to sell a bunch of different humorous shirts, and other decorative things, for homeschool families. Most had something to do with socialization. That was long before the kids decided they wanted the homeschool route.

I've just never understood the whole "kids need to socialize" thing, or that they need to be with "like peers" to do so either. I'd rather my kids know how to be social in any situation. Sure my kids don't have a lot of friends, that's mostly because the kids who DO live near us, I won't let my kids play with. My kids aren't juvenile delinquents and I'd like to keep it that way, lol. The only tagging they do, is to our own property.
But my kids also don't really "need" a ton of friends, or even want them. Even when they were in school they weren't all to comfy with the way kids behave, cliques, things like this. It used to bother Lissy all the time, to see girls acting that way(and we're talking k-3rd graders here not even tweens or teens).
They do have a few friends here, and they have a bunch where my mom lives-which they visit pretty often. It's just not something I worry about, especially right now. I want them to stay kids for as long as they can, and being forced into social situations keyed to their age group based solely on a number(their age) is probably not the best way to go about that-given the way most of the kids in their age group behave around here. Especially ones where they're not even actually allowed to be social-like school.

Now if there were schools that could cater to a small group, of varying learning levels, varying ages, and still manage to create an inviting yet educational atmosphere for them all, then yeah I would be extremely interested in that sort of environment. But that's a total pipe dream. Even some of the best schools I know of can't provide that. If I had the funding to create that sort of charter school, I would so love to. Just to prove it's entirely possible to have that sort of homeschool feel(lack of better term here), allow children to learn at their own pace, allow kids to socialize with more than "like peers", and still have a friendly, inviting, educational and open atmosphere. I think a lot more kids would thrive in that sort of environment. For parents who doubt their abilities with homeschool or for whatever reason simply can't(I can think of a few), it would be a great compromise and a much better alternative than most public and private schools.

But now I'm rambling, lol.

[Trinity82]

The montessori schools are kinda like that, my sister in law taught at one.. They seem to be a lot more laxed with age boundaries, allowing for children to be in groups of a range of age and let their own curiosities lead them..

My son is getting used to the homeschool, he likes the fact that if he is learning something at a fast pace I don't make him spend all the time they do at school on it, I don't need him to do 50 math problems if he can show me in four that he grasps the information.. the only thing that bothers him is he doesn't get to play with children his age.. There are NONE where I live, but there is a auto repair shop at the end of the road and he has made friends with the owner and workers so when he wants to visit with other people besides me and the baby he goes there.. lol.. He loves the interaction! And I am not sorry that he doesn't get to see the kids that he called friends at school, I remember him being so upset on more then one occasion because they were being nasty to him.. One kid threated to bring a gun to school in front of him... some other thinks it is awesome to play run away from my son and I hated having to explain that kids are not always nice.. He has asked if I am going to put him back into school for middle school and I am not! There is no way, he is much better now.. I don't force him to take meds just to be here, I don't force him to play with kids who are mean and then yell at him and send him away because he is mad about it.. Schools are just awfull!