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How do your husbands feel about the over 35 thing


Forum: Pregnancy Over 35

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  #1  
September 27th, 2006, 11:56 AM
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Join Date: Sep 2006
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I would say being an "older" parent but I can't seem to bring myself to use that phrase LOL. Mine will be 45 when this baby is born and is really pretty freaked out by it all. He's worried about the age he'll be when this one graduates, paying for college among other things, how he will retire, etc. I suppose I should be worried about all those things, too? He had many of the same worries with our ds who is now 5 but it all seems amplified this time around. Anyone else have a dh who is not as enthused? Or maybe one that was not as enthused in the beginning but came around later (please tell me when & how?).


Jean
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  #2  
September 27th, 2006, 12:36 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 66
Quote:
I would say being an "older" parent but I can't seem to bring myself to use that phrase LOL. Mine will be 45 when this baby is born and is really pretty freaked out by it all. He's worried about the age he'll be when this one graduates, paying for college among other things, how he will retire, etc. I suppose I should be worried about all those things, too? He had many of the same worries with our ds who is now 5 but it all seems amplified this time around. Anyone else have a dh who is not as enthused? Or maybe one that was not as enthused in the beginning but came around later (please tell me when & how?).


Jean[/b]
You know what, both me (39) and my hubby (40) were a little concerned at first about what our ages would be as our baby grew up. But as soon as she was born, none of that was a concern anymore. Its just that overwhelming love and amazement of the baby that makes everything ok We did decide to actively work on improving our health and fitness so that we might be around as long as possible for our children (we're also expecting a baby boy this Dec).

Also, the way I see things these days.. yes, college and all that is important, but more important than anything is enjoying every moment you have with your children rather than spending that precious time worried and stewing over "what ifs" and "how will we manage" issues. The way I believe.. this baby was meant to be, and therefore, everything really will work out over time as it needs to.

If you want to take some steps to feel a little better about things, I would recommend the following:

Make sure each of you has a rather large life insurance policy. "Just in case" anything ever happens to one of you, the other won't be financially ruined and will be able to provide for the children.

Start a small savings account for each child. We put $5 a week in each of ours. It's not a lot, but as we can afford more, we'll add more.

If college is a major issue with you, go ahead and start planing for it through special savings accounts, or other programs. etc. Frankly, I think college is a bit overrated, but thats just me.

Most importantly, get to a doctor (specially stubborn males) and get a good check up. This way you can see where you are health wise, and start working on fixing anything, or just getting healthier.

Remember, age is just a number, your health and positive attitude is what will carry you through
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  #3  
October 1st, 2006, 06:15 PM
BestWishes05's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Idaho
Posts: 103
Those are all great suggestions ;o). Me and dh (40yrs) were more concerned about our age at the beginning of our pregnancy than we are now. I recently heard a great motto "Focus on What Is not
What If's "
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  #4  
October 2nd, 2006, 11:20 AM
Logan's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Western US
Posts: 1,519
Quote:
I would say being an "older" parent but I can't seem to bring myself to use that phrase LOL. Mine will be 45 when this baby is born and is really pretty freaked out by it all. He's worried about the age he'll be when this one graduates, paying for college among other things, how he will retire, etc. I suppose I should be worried about all those things, too? He had many of the same worries with our ds who is now 5 but it all seems amplified this time around. Anyone else have a dh who is not as enthused? Or maybe one that was not as enthused in the beginning but came around later (please tell me when & how?).


Jean[/b]
My husband will be 51 when this baby is born. He is still in shock and worried but I wouldn't say he isn't enthused. He better be enthused.... it's his fault this happened!

I bet your husband will come around. Make sure he feels the baby moving etc. That may help a little.
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  #5  
October 5th, 2006, 06:00 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,628
I was not sure what my husband would say so I asked him. He said he is not worry. If we have the money to help our son to go to college, we will give it to him. If we don't, kiddo will have to earn it. Basically, it seems that he is not worry much. It is kinda surprising for me. But one day at a time, that is all we can do. We will do everything we can to give the best of life to our son, I guess that is what is important to us right now.
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  #6  
October 6th, 2006, 09:44 AM
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 1
hi. i'm Heaven and i'm new to this forum. this particular topic caught my attention because i'm turning 37 and am most likely pregnant with baby # 3. i'm a little anxious about having another baby although my husband (37) and my kids aged 11 and 8 are very supportive. my husband is, to say the least, ecstatic about the possibility of having another child. we have not really planned on a third child but if we are really pregnant, this is an unexpected blessing. i'm a little concerned about the age factor though LOL.
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  #7  
October 6th, 2006, 08:57 PM
Denise66's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: May 2005
Location: New York
Posts: 5,080
HI I am Denise and I am new hear. We just found out we are expecting again. So far my dh hasn't said a word about our ages. I will be 40 in two weeks and he will be 42 in Nov. My friend told me we are not old we are just wiser.
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  #8  
October 7th, 2006, 06:22 AM
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Texas
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My dh is excited. He was shocked at first and didn't believe the HPT...had to get doctor confirmation....but once he knew "for sure" he was excited. Crazy man.
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  #9  
October 7th, 2006, 07:05 AM
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Central NJ
Posts: 81
No husband to worry about here. I did this by myself with donor sperm. I have a large supportive family though wich is great. My mom had six kids total and I'm the oldest (37). She had the last two at 35 and 40. The only problem I can see is that they're both still living at home at 20 and 25!!! Hope that doesn't happen with mine
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  #10  
October 8th, 2006, 05:58 PM
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DH is 43. He doesn't care one way or another. He is happy.
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