We pride ourselves on having the friendliest
and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment
for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers.
If you have any problems registering please drop an email to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!
I'm strongly considering surrogacy (or at least, offering) for my best friend who is unable to have more children. She is being urged to have a hysterectomy and is pretty devestated. No one has pressured me to do this and I've given it a lot of thought. I never considered this before but I feel like if I were to carry a child for anyone else, I'd definitely want it to be for my friend.
The problem is, they SO do not have the money for extraneous costs, so I won't even mention this to them unless I know it's a financial possibility. My family has pretty good health insurance; how likely are they to cover at least some of the medical expenses? Also, what can I expect as far as other expenses? She is able to have children, as in, she has viable eggs and her husband healthy sperm, but she cannot carry them safely, anymore.
Thanks in advance. This isn't something I think we'd actively pursue for a year or more, but I wanted to get educated on it before mentioning it to my friend, and I worry that she will need to find a way to store her eggs soon if she is to have the hysterectomy.
Sadly, the money situation is a difficult thing for many people to deal with in regard to infertility. If she is going to go through with the surgery soon, she won't necessarily need to freeze her eggs now, unless her dr says that she needs to take care of it before hand.
As for your questions regarding insurance, only they have the answers to that. If you have a book that lists your medical can and can't's, in there should be a line that talks about surrogacy. I would check out the maternity part of that book, or fertility.
Mommy to Damon TS to Kyle 10/07 GS for E and R--WE ARE PREGNANT!!
Try 1--Sept 2010 negative Try 2--Jan 2011 negative
Try 3--May 2011-miscarried at 5 weeks
Transfer 4---PREGNANT!!! BFP @ 5.5dp3dt Beta at 11dp3dt was 164.6
Ultrasound showed TWO BABIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you for your response. I saw my friend this weekend and mentioned it to her; she was very touched and I'm hoping she and her husband will seriously consider it. My husband is on board but thinks I'm thinking prematurely, since their youngest (they have two kids) is only 8 months old. But am I right in thinking that if they decide they want me to do it (I have gotten my point across that I'm willing, and now am just waiting for them to come to me if/when they want to), it'll be months before the pregnancy is actually underway? I mean, I want them to be protected, legally (not expecting anything to happen but it's always good to do it anyway) and we'll all need exams and all sorts of stuff, not to mention her eggs will need to be harvested (is that the right term?) and I know it would take weeks to get my body ready to carry them.