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Is a midwife even worth it?


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  #1  
April 18th, 2008, 12:35 PM
^RaineDrop^'s Avatar Summer Raine is 1 YR OLD!
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While exploring the option of having an unassisted birth, I've started to wonder - How necessary IS a midwife?

Most midwives aren't covered under people's insurance, and then it ends up costing them thousands of dollars just to do something at home that shouldn't cost anything at all. So, really is a midwife worth it?

It's my experience that most women are scared of something going wrong, so they pay to have security. I think that that's ultimately what I'm getting a midwife for, but a midwife won't necessarily have more knowledge than I can get by doing the research, but they have the experience...

I'm kinda thinking all over the place here, but I am just curious what others think..?




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  #2  
April 18th, 2008, 01:50 PM
*Vero*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Well I have extreme trust in my midwife... but it may be different where you live... Here in Ontario Canada, in order to go by the title of "midwife" the person has had to be accredited by the College of Midwives of Ontario. A midwife is a medical professional.

I am lucky however... being Canadian, I do not pay for health care and being in Ontario, midwives (and homebirths) are completely covered and I never even get a bill.. so I would not know the cost of a midwife.

Wether or not a midwife is worth it is probably a very personal decision.. for me it is! I find that no matter how much research I make, it does not compare to the education that a midwife here in Ontario goes through... It is also a 3rd party that has your best interest in mind... By being removed from the situation, she can tell much better the you or your husband if something is going wrong...

Now don't get me wrong... People birth unassisted with great consequences all the time... but when spmethng goes wrong it is nice to have a cool collected person there who has a plan of action...

I'm a bit different then a lot of people on these boards and some may not agree with me.. and I really do not mean to cause a debate... I just feel that though birth is not a disease and it does not need to be treated by doctors and hospitals, it can have it's complications and I am one for doctors and hospital in the case where there is somethign to be "fixed".

Basically if it ain't broken don't fix it... but if you may break it, it's good to have a good plan to have it fixed! lol

I also read statistics on home births... (I wish I remembered well) and the only study indicating that home birth was not as safe as hospital birth (or even safer) was a study that took into account all home births (planned or not planned and assisted and not assisted) I can try to find that study of you want...

Anyways - all this to say that if you are to decide you will birth without a midwife, I would not try to dissuade you from it, because I really don't think the risk would be THAT bad... but at the same time I would never do it myself...
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  #3  
April 18th, 2008, 01:57 PM
^RaineDrop^'s Avatar Summer Raine is 1 YR OLD!
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Quote:
People birth unassisted with great consequences all the time... but when spmethng goes wrong it is nice to have a cool collected person there who has a plan of action..[/b]
I like this.. this is pretty much how I feel, I agree it's a very personal thing.
My midwife costs are looking at $3,300 for the birth and $65 an hour for pre-natal appointments. All of it has to be paid before the actual birth so that gives us like 6 weeks to pay for everything and on top of that we have those other medical bills going on..

Mostly I'm only even CONSIDERING going unassisted because I'm stressing about the money right now. I know I would feel more secure and comfortable with the midwife there.. I think if I'm honest with myself I won't do it, but I'm also wondering if she would go for hanging out on the phone to walk us through what she would do if she WERE there.. Eh I'm just mixed up here, we had everything figured out until we found out how much it was actually guna cost.


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  #4  
April 18th, 2008, 02:04 PM
*Vero*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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well to be totally honest, I personally would skip out on a few pre-natal appointments before skipping out on the actual asisted birth...

Have you discussed payment options with the midwives... often they will say one thing but if you express concern they may be able to make a payment plan for you... man having to pay for the birth is such a PITA!!

LOL each time I hate the weather here and think I wanna move somewhere warm, I need to remind myself to at least wait until i am done having children!! lol!!
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  #5  
April 18th, 2008, 02:18 PM
^RaineDrop^'s Avatar Summer Raine is 1 YR OLD!
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Yeah once she calls me back again I'm going to seriously just tell her every detail of our bank account and income and bills, and pray she allows us to pay past the birth too.. I mean why would I bother ripping her off if we've already given her a grand or two?? Not that I would consider ripping anyone off anyway, but yeah. We just don't have the TIME and I don't need the stress, I reeeeallllly really hope she understands

Plus this is my first baby and I have NO CLUE about anything and I really need her lol. She's been delivering babies for 35 years so I'm sure she's seen a case or two like me before. I hope that's a good thing!
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  #6  
April 18th, 2008, 02:39 PM
*Vero*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Good Luck!!

I really hope she can be accomodating... you'd so think she would be...
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  #7  
April 18th, 2008, 02:43 PM
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Our midwife was really good about letting us pay her installments after the birth, as we were able. We had to put half down before the birth, and took the time we needed to pay off the rest afterwards. I also did all of my prenatal care with my regular OB (the one who delivered my first two in hospital), and the midwife only took over in the last few weeks of pregnancy and the birth itself. Part of the reason for that was because she lives in the US, and we're in Canada - but it meant we didn't have to pay for any of the prenatal care because it was covered by our health system.

Don't underestimate the experience of the midwife. You may have read about how to deal with an emergency, but in the moment it's another story. Think of the difference between reading about how to parallel park and actually trying it the first time with a real car. Having someone there how is trained to prevent, identify, and manage problems is worth the money IMO.
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  #8  
April 18th, 2008, 03:16 PM
^RaineDrop^'s Avatar Summer Raine is 1 YR OLD!
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I hear ya, I agree, but I'm just wondering if it's also worth the stress it can cause.. I'm trying not to stress about anything right now though, but thanks for that!
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  #9  
April 18th, 2008, 06:59 PM
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I personally would love to have an unassisted home birth but there is NO WAY that I could get DH to agree to that. It took 6 or 8 months to get him to agree to let me have a home birth once we do get pregnant. Even now he just looks at me whenever it comes up and says I'm a "crazy hippie". lol For his peace of mind it's worth it in my opinion. Otherwise the first contraction that causes me to make a sound he'll be on the phone to 911 and have an ambulance on its way!

Just so you know....once he sees our first successful homebirth, I'm fighting tooth and nail for an unassisted birth the next time! The "crazy hippie" in me demands that I do it!
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  #10  
April 18th, 2008, 07:38 PM
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BTW, do you have no insurance or is it just that your insurance wont cover a MW? If its the latter, almost everyone i know in that situation has successfully appealled their insurance company & gotten their birth covered. Some started the process late & got "refunded" but others got it done in time that the ins company picked up the bill!

Lala...
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  #11  
April 18th, 2008, 08:50 PM
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my feeling as an unassisted birthing mom is this: there are those women who UC because of monetary issues but I tend to see that their births are longer harder and more stressful because they are worried. Worry is fear, fear means there will be tension and tension means there will be increased pain and the body needs to be at ease to work as it should.

For me, I knew that I could not let go and be in my element with a midwife present. There was a study quite a while back (I can't recall the source ATM, but I will look for it) that showed women who were in a room with someone who they felt inferior to experienced a drop in estrogen comparable to having an ovary removed, so if you aren't really comfortable wit your MW, if you fee lesser than her it may cause such an imbalance that it would be worse for you than UCing.

That said if you don't feel that you can birth without a MW things will likely be harder for you anyway. It is entirely dependent on the mother and her ability to listen to her instincts as well as retain information under stress. I will say there is something amazingly liberating and empowering in managing your own care and being left to labor completely uninhibited.
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  #12  
April 18th, 2008, 09:54 PM
Isaeph's Avatar Jennifer the Momma
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Quote:
For me, I knew that I could not let go and be in my element with a midwife present. There was a study quite a while back (I can't recall the source ATM, but I will look for it) that showed women who were in a room with someone who they felt inferior to experienced a drop in estrogen comparable to having an ovary removed, so if you aren't really comfortable wit your MW, if you fee lesser than her it may cause such an imbalance that it would be worse for you than UCing.[/b]
Wow, that is so crazy interesting! My mom does that to me, sheesh. Wow, I'm going to have to look that up so I can read more.


I was nursing Ele to sleep earlier today when I was messaging you Heather, and I forgot this part...we also were worried about money and didn't want to pay the mw's all that money either! So don't feel bad. Its amazing what situations God can use to teach you-we would have never leaned so far out there on Him if we were at the bc with a mw in charge. I know some will say how horrible it is to consider something like UC because of finances, but as long as you have you and your baby's best interest at heart, it doesn't matter why you choose to do what you do. Its not like you're thinking of performing a kidney transplant or something by yourself. I felt guilty for a while about money being a factor for us, but it was. There was no way we could afford to pay for the birth, even afterwards. So it was a relief for us too. My parents even offered to pay, but I did NOT want that hanging over our heads.
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  #13  
April 18th, 2008, 10:20 PM
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If anyone has time to search, the study I mentioned was referenced by LauraShanley in one of her posts on MDC. Unfortunately, there are about 400 posts, so it's taking me quite a bit of time to find the right one.
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  #14  
April 19th, 2008, 06:27 AM
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My third birth as an accidental unassisted, and it was a great experience.
My fourth birth turned into a 10 pounder with shoulder dystocia that I had to stand up out of the birthing pool to push out while she went in to unwedge his shoulders. I do not have confidence that my husband would have understood what to do in that situation.

I am glad she was there this time.
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  #15  
April 19th, 2008, 07:11 AM
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For me personally having an trusted experienced outsiders help is SSOOO worth it. I have seen to many people in my life freak out in painful or stressful situations. I'm a trained RN in L&D and i don't think I could do it on my own for my first one, its more the little things that would be the issue. MW are so great for telling positions or tips/trick on how to help that baby come out faster and less painful....you can read 10 million books but they somehow just know by looking at your discomfort what would be a better position for you and such. Plus on my first one ...i guess i don't KNOW that i can do it yet. Once i have one i think i could do others on my own, but i would still want one there mainly because of the support aspect. Yes a doula can do that but it gets tricky for doulas when there is no primary medical person there. Because as a doula we can't give you advice on medical stuff...if we know it or not, we lose our license if we do.
For me its mainly for the support, fresh set of knowledgeable eyes and the very little what ifs in my brain -that i need one there. I can do at home and a CNM but that about as "hippie" lol as i get. And lastly IF (god forbid) something went wrong and I had no one there, i couldn't live with myself, but thats so just me. I love love love the women who can do it on their own-that must feel so amazing and powerful, i just don't trust myself enough and I KNOW i would have issues if something happened and no one was there-BIG issues.
As long as you do what you feel is best for your baby...thats key. Don't let money make that choice for you.... choose because you feel its right..and it should work out just fine for you.
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  #16  
April 19th, 2008, 03:42 PM
^RaineDrop^'s Avatar Summer Raine is 1 YR OLD!
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Quote:
BTW, do you have no insurance or is it just that your insurance wont cover a MW? If its the latter, almost everyone i know in that situation has successfully appealled their insurance company & gotten their birth covered. Some started the process late & got "refunded" but others got it done in time that the ins company picked up the bill!

Lala...[/b]

Well it's not just our insurance company, it's like all midwives for the state just aren't "recognized" by them or something. I don't think I'd be able to appeal anything.
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  #17  
April 20th, 2008, 08:22 AM
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Our midwife was out of pocket for much of her care because she was considered to be out of network. I think her costs were totally worth it, and I know I got far superior care from her than from my previous OB/Hospital births. Our labor was pretty uncomplicated but her presence and knowledge was wonderful support for us. I would definitely check with her about payment options. I know that some midwives in our area do sliding scale fees and are flexible in payments. From what I have seen and heard most midwives are in this profession for the Mom's and babies, not to make a huge profit. My Mom and husband were probably my best source of support but I loved that Cori and her assistant were right there if we had questions or wanted suggestions on things to try. I considered my self to be pretty educated on birth but no comparison to someone that has delivered a substantial amount of babies and has 1st hand knowledge on how to help with any complication. As previous posters have said, I mean no disrespect to those who go UC, it just wasn't the right choice for our family.
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  #18  
April 20th, 2008, 10:01 PM
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I hope everything works out with your midwife!

We had to pay ours out of pocket, but it was absolutely worth it to me. In retrospect, Amelia's birth was easy and uncomplicated, and I COULD have absolutely done it unassisted. But, I had no way of knowing what would happen beforehand, and I felt better - as Veronique said - having someone there who was calm, collected and knew what to do if they were needed. Besides that, I was just fortunate to have a midwife that became a close friend during my pregnancy, and I was happy to share the experience with her.
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  #19  
April 21st, 2008, 08:46 AM
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I had a midwife with my 3rd and she was awesome. I would love to hire her or someone else for my births, but sadly, there is nobody available. My 4th was unassisted, I called every midwife in my province, none could/would come. My midwife encouraged and coached me in unassisted birth. My 5th is the same, called everyone, and aside from bringing in a midwife from another country who would have to stay with me, I can't find anyone. I am not up for a houseguest and I would rather go unassisted again.
One day, my city will have a midwife, I should be registered in 5-8 years time.
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  #20  
April 21st, 2008, 09:16 AM
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BTW, double check your deductibles & copays - typically the hospital & Dr charge seperately. FOr us = paying out of pocket for the HB MW ended up being cheaper than a DR in a hospital. The insurance covered the dr & hospital but not MW homebirth (b/c we used a lay midwife not licensed in our state).

Our HB was 1700 - our copays & out of pocket & deductibles with an OB would have been about $2k in the end. ($20/visit, plus 20% of the total bill).

Lala...
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