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Why did you chose/want a homebirth?


Forum: Home Birth

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  #1  
August 8th, 2008, 10:31 AM
CameraLinds's Avatar Zane & Jude's mama
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Just curious as to everyone's reasons why they want (ed) and or chose to have a home birth?!?
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  #2  
August 8th, 2008, 10:38 AM
soImarriedAnerd's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I worked as a nurse in the L&D unit in our hospital---and I saw all the problem our medical rules caused! I wanted nothing to do with it. (funny thing is there is another lady on JM that says----she worked on a L&D floor as a nurse and she KNOWs what can go wrong so she thinks people are insane for homebirths-------I think its funny was both saw the same thing and came to two different thoughts-just show how different people think)
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  #3  
August 8th, 2008, 10:53 AM
CameraLinds's Avatar Zane & Jude's mama
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Here's my story....(sorry it may be long)

When DH and I started talking (we met a christian dating site) he told me he was born at home. At first, I thought it was an accidental homebirth but come to find out it wasn't. He was the first born at home (His 2 elder sisters were hospital births and there were 6 after him born at home) I grew up with the typical American knowledge that baby's are born in hospitals, so this of course was a lil weird to me. But then I started to do some research on homebirths and come to find out, I was in shock. A bit upset that I had the typical American knowledge and that I didn't know that home births were still possible/happening currently.

From my extensive research, I decided/discovered that a home birth is definitely what I wanted and hoped for. For many reasons. One of the biggest reasons for me is probably my fear of hospitals and doctors. I HATE them. I really LOVE our midwives! They treat us like people. they support us and take time with our appointments. I love how they are all natural minded and they have the same views as us on breastfeeding, circumcision, babywearing, cloth diapering, vaccines, etc. Normal docs see you as fast as they can and then charge you tons of mula. Also, I can't stand the smell of hospitals. I don't like the whole white look and feel, it just creeps me out and makes me think death or something and there's no way I want to have a baby in there. I wouldn't be comfortable at all and I know it, it'd stress/freak me out that I'd probably end up with a c-section, the last thing I want. I'm also, not a fan of needles, etc I knew previously that I didn't want any epidural, IV etc. I wanted to do it naturally and I know it's possible and if I want it so badly then I am determined to do it. I am so very interested and hoping to have a water labor/birth too. Warm/hot baths are/were the ONLY thing that pretty much helped my AF cramps, I would seriously take about 4 baths a day, so I know that I will be comfortable in the water tub, water relaxes me and keeps me calm and I know this will help a lot during labor. And of course all the other small little factors of home births is why we want/chose to have one: the cost (since we are insuranceless), the atmosphere/comfort of your own home, it's cleaner/safer and easier (no traveling in labor).

I really cannot wait for our homebirth. I pray it goes as we hope and that we do indeed get our home/water birth with no transportation to the hospital/c-section required.

Hope I have made sense! If not, I'm sorry, ask and I'll try to explain.

Quote:
I worked as a nurse in the L&D unit in our hospital---and I saw all the problem our medical rules caused! I wanted nothing to do with it. (funny thing is there is another lady on JM that says----she worked on a L&D floor as a nurse and she KNOWs what can go wrong so she thinks people are insane for homebirths-------I think its funny was both saw the same thing and came to two different thoughts-just show how different people think)[/b]
Wow that's crazy! but very interesting! Awesome choice!
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  #4  
August 8th, 2008, 11:15 AM
UrbanMomma's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Horrible, horrible hospital births with my first four, including an unneceserean, are why I chose to birth at home.
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  #5  
August 8th, 2008, 11:22 AM
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Because of being in the hospital, I became nervous and closed up (literally, my cervix) thus causing me to get an epi and pitocin. A lot of interventions.... didn't like it at all.

I want to be home, I want to be left alone, I want to be on my turf. I'm very "natrual" in a lot of things because I'm Wiccan and I just feel that I should be home.
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  #6  
August 8th, 2008, 11:34 AM
inyourhonor's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I wrote this introduction for another site.

I was 19 when I had my son. He was a hospital birth. I was naive but not stupid. I was doing research and such with him and yet, I still had a c-section. I was a domino effect section. I went into labor on my own, they decided to induce me further. So I was hooked up to pitocin. They gave me morphine (I honestly cannot remember why) and those made the pitocin contractions, along with my own, so horribly painful that I couldn't take it anymore. I had an epidural to help the pain. That slowed my contractions, then they upped my pitocin. They said my son wasn't doing well and they needed to take him then. I was in labor for a total of 23 hours and had pushed for an hour and a half. I wanted him to be born vaginally. Being 19 and a first time mom, I felt scared into that decision by their words.

My son was posterior. Thus meaning, I'd labor long and push longer. I am now seeing a home birth midwife for this pregnancy. When I got my medical records, I looked over them before I gave them to my midwife and, my c-section was completely unnecessary and 100% unwanted.

So, after telling my husband I don't want to go back to a hospital. I started my search in our new town for a midwife who would deliver me VBAC at a birth center. Unfortunately, none could do to their back up OB's not supporting VBACs in my town.

I felt hopeless and frustrated. After a long discussion with my husband, we decided to do it at home. I found a wonderful midwife.

We are looking into doing a water birth at home. At least have the birthing pool set up so I can at least labor in it and if I decide, birth.

My husband has gone a complete 180. He was completely against the thought at first. Until I finally broke down and told him how upset I was over our sons birth. I didn't connect with my son for months. It took me so long to find that connection with him. I didn't get to see my son at first. They took him away to put antibiotics in him (they thought i had an infection in my uterus) and I didn't meet him until I was in recovery.

Now, my husband is my biggest supporter. I had actually found a CNM who had a backing doctor to birth at our local hospital meeting set up 2 days after my meeting with our home birth midwife. Well, we met with the home birth midwife and once we left, my husband instantly told me to cancel the other meeting. He was on board and wanted to do this.
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  #7  
August 8th, 2008, 12:55 PM
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Because I want a VBAC and I don't think I have much of a chance of getting one or much support in a hospital/birthing center. The midwives I saw that do VBAC were very rude to me. Calling me fat or to "heavy" @ 190 pounds. Saying I'm going to have a big baby and have shoulder dysteria? I think that's very rare, like 2%. My first baby was only 6 pounds 5 oz. I think a second c-section is very dangerous. I just want to have my baby without being bothered with pitocin, drugs, epi, unnecessary c-section and a "you can't" attitude. I think it's the best place to have a baby and will have the best outcome and it's where I'm most comfortable. I'm scared to have baby in the hospital. Some people think home birth is crazy I think hospital birth is.
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  #8  
August 8th, 2008, 02:34 PM
*Vero*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Well with my first I could not find a doctor and my cousin introduced me to her midwife. I didn't even know midwives existed until then. During my visit with her she asked me if I would have a hospital or home birth? I double-took! "huh birth at home?" lol

Anyways fast-forward.. I had a hospital birth assisted by my midwife and it went wonderfully.. I don't have a bad scary hospital story as my reason.. lol I have the contrary.. it went so well.. I thought to myself "why couldn't i have done the same thing at home?" but I still wasn't sure... I mean why fix it if it ain't broke...

well I become pregnant with my second and I am no longer in my midwive's catchment area and I have to go to a different midwifery group... well this group was still dealing and negotiating to get hospital priviledge... at the same time I started worrying about who would take care of my oldest while I go in to the hospital and started considering a home birth... I bring it up to my midwife, and she's not sure about it because my local hospital (not the one they were dealing with trying to get priviledges) is not equipped to deal with emergency (they have one general surgeon who is on call and may perform a C-section if absolutely necessary.) and the closest hospitals that were equipped were 1 hour away (to the east and west!) so I get convinced otherwise when she tells me about the birthing suites etc at the hospital she had in mind (sounded alot like the experience I had with my first) Well fast forward to when it comes close to delivery time.. they still do not have priviledges!! I still do not have someone to watch my daughter... They had an arrangement where a doctor delivers and the midwife acts as a doula.. I was not comfortable with that... I agree to meet the doctor anyways but start reconsidering the home birth. The doctor cannot take me.. my midwife finds me a new doctor.. this doctor though works out of my local hospital... the one who is not equipped to handle emergencies! I agree to meet with her in case I have no choice but to go to the hospital... but at this point I had my mind made up... I was having a home birth! It just made sense.. it solved all my problems

So I had my home birth and it was great! If I can help it I will have my next at home too!
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  #9  
August 10th, 2008, 10:38 PM
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I had a horrible hosiptal birth. They scared me into being induced, I was forced to stay in bed and lie on my back. It was awful and they were rude.

Plus my mom had 2 of my sisters at home. I always new I wanted a home birth, I was just scared to have my first at home.
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  #10  
August 12th, 2008, 03:09 PM
Lonomia
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Having a home birth felt natural and right to me. After watching my mother spend months in the hospital receiving cancer treatments and then passing away pretty much made me despise hospitals. I didn't want drugs or unnecessary intervention during my labor and I certainly didn't want a man delivering my son. I wanted to labor in comfort, familiarity and peace for both me and my son.
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  #11  
August 12th, 2008, 05:31 PM
Alison79's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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My first three were inductions in a hospital. While the experiences weren't bad they weren't how I imagined birth to be. When I was pregnant with Reid we relocated and the local hospitals all had very high c-section rates. I decided that I wanted a midwife and found a wonderful home birth midwife who I immediately knew was the right choice to care for us. I wanted to go into labor naturally (and I did at 17 days past my due date). I wanted to labor in a place where I felt comfortable. To be able to eat and drink when I needed to and to be surrounded by people who believed in natural childbirth. My experience was all that I hoped it would be and more. I no longer fear the pain of childbirth but rather embrace the journey that is ahead.
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  #12  
August 13th, 2008, 08:47 AM
ragmama's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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My first daughter was born in a hospital - induced at five days past her due date. It wasn't a *horrible* experience until I got the epidural - which I hadn't researched, and just assumed that it was "what you do." Rachael's heartrate plummeted as soon as the epidural was placed, people started swarming into the room in a panic - it was just a terrifying experience. Thankfully, she righted herself and we continued on. A few hours later, the nurse mentioned that the doctor would want to discuss a C-section since I wasn't progressing quickly enough. (I was induced at 7 a.m. and this was at 5:15 p.m. - I was about 6cm. Even though I didn't know much about birth politics at the time, I was immediately suspicious that doc just wanted to go home for the evening...) Anyway, labor did progress and Rachael was born vaginally at 7:33 p.m. Doc barely made it there in time to catch her.

After I got home with her, I did a little research online about why her heartrate would have fallen that way - and learned that it's VERY common with the epidural. The more I read - about the effects epidurals can have, about how hospital interventions can stall labor, about how one intervention can lead to another and another - the more convinced I was that I never wanted to give birth in a hospital again, if it could be avoided.

Midwives aren't common at all in our area, so I started looking for one before we even started TTC #2. And had my dream birth at home with Amelia.
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  #13  
August 13th, 2008, 08:42 PM
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In my mind hospital are for the very sick and those with emergency medical conditions. A normal pregnancy and birth do not fit into either of those categories.

I wanted to be able to control the the environment that my child was born into, down to the lighting, people present and the temperature of the room. I wanted the undivided attention of a midwife that I liked and trusted for my entire labor and long personal prenatal appointments on my couch that led up to it. I wanted to have the options of eating, drinking, changing position and birthing in water. I didn't want to have to labor on anyone else's time schedule. And finally after my child was born I wanted to climb into my own bed and go to sleep.

So I gave birth at home and it was amazing.
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  #14  
August 14th, 2008, 04:03 AM
*~*N*i*c*o*l*e*~*'s Avatar Mommy Since 2006
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i want to experience the natural child birth process without a timelimit, without rushing without interference. Women have been doing this for years and now all of a sudden its so clinical. I want to be on my own terms, not becasue some doctor has lunch in half an hour. Iwant to enjoy this experience as my last two pregnancies i was robbed of it.
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  #15  
August 15th, 2008, 06:05 AM
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I had no choice but to be in the hospital with my last daughter, becuase of the preeclampsia. I was really scared and unprepared for it, and the whole experience was just really emotionally draining (not in a good way).

Honestly right now I just want to cry even thinking about having to go to the hospital. I just want to stay home, and be able to lay in my own bed, go in the shower if I want or labor in a nice warm tub of water. I also am looking forward to being able to eat to keep my energy up, and just being way more relaxed than I was with Aden. I pretty much cried the whole time I was in labor with her, except when the nurses gave me stadohl to calm me down

Also I don't want my baby to have any unnecessary shots/medical procedures right after he/she is born. The story about all those babies that died in the Texas NICU because of an accidental overdose FREAKED me out so bad!

Oh, and I love midwives, they always want to talk and really get to know you and they really CARE so much about you. My OB is nice but he's very distant and my appointments are always short because I can't think of anything to say to him.
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  #16  
August 15th, 2008, 10:52 AM
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We decided on a home birth because I wanted to try something different. Also because I hate hospitals and I hate know it all nurses. I know what I want and I know my body, so we started seeing a midwife and she is great. We make all the decisions about the pregnancy and she respects what we decide. Another reason why we decided on a home birth ws because the only hospital we have here had a baby abducted from it less than a year ago, and this is a small town with no real security measures in place in the hospital.

For us a home birth we be a lot more comfortable (especially for me).
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  #17  
August 15th, 2008, 11:54 PM
Isaeph's Avatar Jennifer the Momma
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I had a terrible birth experience with ds that was a danger to HIS health. My water broke spontaneously and rather than letting my body go into labor on its own, they gave me cervical gel to induce contractions. I thought I was very well researched, I read practically everything on babycenter (what a joke ). But I didn't know the science behind labor (thank you "Active Birth" by Janet Balaskas). They wanted to give me pitocin, but I'd seen enough episodes of A Baby Story to know better and I told them "over my dead body". I did NOT want an epidural, but my mom and MIL both told me what a dumb decision that was. Dh was supportive, but he was scared and naive like I was. The nurses SUCKED...all 3 I had in the first 7 hours of my stay. My last nurse was our saving grace there...I think between her coming in and helping me roll from side to side every 15 minutes, and the fact that 14 other babies were born that night were the only reasons no one tried twisting my arm into a c-section. I did end up with the epidural (and that and the unnatural contractions lowered his heartrate repeatedly into the 70's) because my bed rocked back and forth and they literally did NOT care...I get car sick very easily and was pretty much told to suck it up. I just wanted to throw up and die. Also, they had NOTHING to support a natural labor, they had a shower, but that was not comfortable...I ended up laying on the floor in there with hot water spraying whatever part of my body I could managed until I finally broke and asked for the epi. The nurse (my third) was totally triumphant. Beastly woman, she was the worst. He was born 4 hours later with just a few pushes and an unnecessary UNWANTED suddenly sprung on me episiotomy. Then the doctor wouldn't even let me touch him. They took him across the room for the first ten minutes or so and I finally got to hold him after that. The doctor also seemed completely inconvenienced by our desire to bank his cord blood. He clearly could NOT get out of the room fast enough. The rest of our hospital stay SUCKED majorly too. They made us put him in a warming bed when we got moved to the recovery room and wouldn't let us pick him up for over an hour. The stupid machine kept buzzing, I think it just didn't work properly. When I finally lost it (and I'm not confrontational) and YELLED at the freaking nurse at her station, she told me I could just hold him. There was nothing pleasant about our stay. And I have a scar on my cervix that FREAKING hurts every time I ovulate or get af from the gel (it really couldn't be from anything else unless a nurse or the doctor manhandled me, ds's decent through my cervix was very gentle, he was already crowning when I started pushing). The only good thing was bringing him home...It absolutely sucked and the only way I'll ever give birth in a hospital again is if my baby or myself will die otherwise, or it becomes illegal to give birth outside a hospital in all 50 states.

We had a glorious, close to perfect planned, well-educated, unassisted homebirth with dd and are planning another again.
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  #18  
August 28th, 2008, 08:22 AM
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Because it's safer, more comfortable, and the normal thing to do where I'm from (Holland).
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  #19  
August 30th, 2008, 08:47 AM
cheezpoofs's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Well, I watched the movie The Business of Being Born and the statistics scare me. The newborn and mother mortality rates for this the supposed "leader country of the world" are astronomical and nonsensical. I never wanted the epidural, episiotomy, pitocin, or c-section. I just can't get behind the idea that cutting out the baby is the best way to give birth. Since the doctors push the drugs and the drugs facilitate a need for a Cessarian, I don't want to be in the environment of the drug pushing. Women have been doing this since the dawn of man and way back in ancient times, they must have had a natural method for it, because there weren't hospital OBGYNs and drugs to "assist" labor. Naturally, I would guess that water birth is likely the way things were done back then. I had been interested in having a water birth since before I got pregnant, but my current doctor/ hospital doesn't facilitate that birth method.

After nine months of me watching my own chemical intake like a hawk: no alcohol (this one is hard for me, because I really like to have me some booze), no caffeine (harder to stay awake now and I couldn't try the new Mountain Dew flavors ), no artificial food coloring (It's in almost everything.), no MSG (Doritos...), no rare meat (I like my steak medium rare.), no medications unless absolutely necessary (got off almost all my asthma and allergy meds once I found out I was pregnant); it just makes no sense to me that I would get all the way up to my son's birth and pump him full of drugs that likely ARE harmful to him. I can handle the pain of childbirth. Sure I've never done it before, but I am a very tough woman.

I won't be actually giving birth at home - my insurance doesn't cover that, but I am going to a birthing center with a midwife to have a natural birth in a birthing pool. I will go meet the midwife and tour the birthing center next week, and I hope to "break up" with my doctor in that week as well (I was told that she would be discussing the ultrasound with me this time around and I didn't even get to see her yesterday at my ultrasound appointment, nor did they have my records ready as I had asked them to. ). The natural thing works well for me and my family because we prefer to take natural remedies where they are possible and we do not want a circumcision for our son.
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