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How long did it take to get your dh/so to get on board?


Forum: Home Birth

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  #1  
December 9th, 2009, 02:21 PM
fka teresarunningmommy
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Was your dh/so for homebirth right away or did he have to be coaxed into it? I know mine was definitely opposed and it's take quite a bit of swaying to get him there. He still doesn't think it's a wonderful idea, but he is coming around.
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  #2  
December 9th, 2009, 02:40 PM
Kelllilee's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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he's been on board since day 1. Even would be on board for unassisted if I ever decided to do that...
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  #3  
December 9th, 2009, 02:54 PM
Alison79's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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He was the one who suggested home birth actually. I had been looking to a birth center birth and he asked if I had thought about home birth instead.
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  #4  
December 9th, 2009, 03:23 PM
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When I told my DH that our local birth center had closed down, he automatically assumed we were doing an unassisted homebirth, so I'd have to say he's always been on board. Of course, he didn't say anything at the time. I didn't know that until I told him I'd found a hb midwife several months later.
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  #5  
December 9th, 2009, 04:41 PM
Twinkle's Avatar Platinum Super Mommy
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My DH isn't jumping up and down for a home birth, but he's not opposed to it and supports me. Unfortunately he didn't have a great experience with it last time with Kate. He was responsible for most of the clean up and honestly didn't get that bonding time with Kate after she was born... and that was because of Kate's breathing problems that required the midwives attention. I am hoping this time around that things go more smoothly and Paul really gets that bonding time with the baby and me that he feels like he missed out on last time.
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  #6  
December 9th, 2009, 05:04 PM
Buttercups's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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DH has three sisters and 12 nieces and nephews. All of them were the result of natural childbirth, 10 with a midwife. I'm blessed that he didn't need much coaxing!
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  #7  
December 9th, 2009, 05:20 PM
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DH has been onboard with it since day 1! He feels like not only was I robbed of a birth but so was he with what happened with DS2. This time around we both feel like everything is going the way it should!
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  #8  
December 9th, 2009, 05:24 PM
Lonomia's Avatar Super Hot Mommy
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Awesome! We have so many supportive SO's!

Lin is incredibly supportive of home birth. He trusts me completely when it comes to anything to do with pregnancy/birth/parenting.
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  #9  
December 10th, 2009, 06:29 AM
fka teresarunningmommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Twinkle View Post
My DH isn't jumping up and down for a home birth, but he's not opposed to it and supports me. Unfortunately he didn't have a great experience with it last time with Kate. He was responsible for most of the clean up and honestly didn't get that bonding time with Kate after she was born... and that was because of Kate's breathing problems that required the midwives attention. I am hoping this time around that things go more smoothly and Paul really gets that bonding time with the baby and me that he feels like he missed out on last time.
Glad to see I am not alone over here. I was beginning to feel like I had the only husband like this.
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  #10  
December 10th, 2009, 08:00 AM
jhmomofmany's Avatar Look! A Dancing Banana!
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it took four pregnancies, lol! Srsly, DH didn't need convincing- he saw up close what they did to me and our babies at the hospital, and although he felt nervous at first and had a lot of questions, he was very on-board from the first discussion about homebirthing. Now I think he would agree that catching his own babies with his bare hands in the same room they were made is the best Daddy-moment ever!
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  #11  
December 10th, 2009, 08:13 AM
WishingStar's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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It took this long... 10 pregnancies, 4 births with midwives in hospitals. Finally, he agreed. But, he's still very worried.
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  #12  
December 10th, 2009, 08:28 AM
Twinkle's Avatar Platinum Super Mommy
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You definitely aren't alone, Teresa. My DH supports me and my decisions, but he wouldn't CHOOSE this by himself.
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  #13  
December 10th, 2009, 04:05 PM
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My first was a hospital birth. When I got pregnant with my son, I knew I couldn't go back to the hospital, but dh was REALLY against it. As we got closer to my due date and my feelings grew stronger, I finally went behind his back and interviewed midwives. I found one I loved and knew I was doing the right thing. I tried talking to him about it some more, but finally I just dropped a pile of studies and articles concerning the safety of midwives and homebirth in his lap and told him to get on board, because we were having a homebirth whether he liked it or not! It was really that important to me...
He did his reading and met my midwife, and slowly came around. I think I was around 7 or 8 months along at the time. He was really just concerned with the "what if something happens" factor, and once the "experts" explained things to him, he felt a lot better. I think before that, he had this picture in his head of this old hag armed with a rusty pair of scissors was what midwifery was about...

Anyway, he was great at the birth, and when I got pregnant this time the first thing he said was, "Oh boy! Where are we going to find a midwife?" I've even heard him talking about homebirth with other dad's and stuff-- he's a total convert!
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  #14  
December 10th, 2009, 05:42 PM
flitabout's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I never asked him. I told him, and our son told him that he wanted mommy to have the baby at home! When he didn't seem real supportive, I showed him some of the stuff I found online about ercs and hospital vbacs and some other women that where just tired of being lied to, and then just cut open willy nilly. After they had had enough decided on a home birth. He has since gotten on board.
His only concern was something I think all men worry about as he would really just prefer me to have ercs. Stuff changing down below!
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  #15  
December 15th, 2009, 06:18 AM
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It took a little bit of coaxing but he's a good listener. Now he is one of the guys who stands up for it when he hears others talking about it. Next up is coaxing him into UA.
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  #16  
December 15th, 2009, 08:50 AM
CameraLinds's Avatar Zane & Jude's mama
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Homebirth was his idea! DH was the first born at home and so were the rest of his 6 siblings. So he was used to and understood HBs thankfully.
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  #17  
December 17th, 2009, 02:40 PM
HappyHippy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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DH was on board before I even said anything. He actually suggested a unassisted childbirth, but I recommended a Midwife assisted home birth.
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