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  #1  
January 23rd, 2010, 06:59 PM
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This might end up kind of long- but I want to make sure everything gets in here. I'm just confused, and can't hear what my intuition is saying... wondered what you all would do in my situation.

I'm only two days past due, but my original due date was the 13th, so emotionally, I feel way more post term than I am. I don't do pregnancy gracefully- I've never really liked the feeling of having a person growing in me (forgive me, but to me, the feeling is more "leechlike"). This is also my third baby, and it's been a rough pregnancy. I feel done. Like I can't do anymore. Actually I feel a lot the way Frodo must have felt trying to get up that last bit of mountain with the ring.

As of last check, I am 4-5cm's, 60%, -2, and somewhere between posterior and anterior, and very soft. This is normal for the way I labor- I was 4cm's for close to a month with both my other two before I went into labor. But until today, I wasn't experiencing much for other signs of impending labor. Just today I've started passing some bits of plug and my bh's have changed- still very infrequent and irregular, but at least more "real contraction" in feeling. Makes me think that I have made some more progress from my last check.

Other pertinent bits of info--- I haven't been able to sleep all day today or last night. My heartburn is awful and I keep choking on stomach acid whenever I drift off to sleep. I am exhausted, and I fear going into labor more exhausted than I am now.

There is a storm on the way- already twice this winter we have had storms that have shut down the interstates. I don't think I need to fear this happening with this storm, but the possibility is there, and it will at least make travel slower for my midwife, and for us if for some reason we'd have to transfer.

My midwife has two other women due NOW, like me. Between the weather and these women, she's concerned about not being able to make it to all the births.

My last labor was 4 hours total, and only about an hour of it was serious enough to make me believe it was actually labor. My midwife at the time was coming from 4 blocks away and still only made it with 20 minutes to spare. My midwife this time is coming from 10-30 miles away. I'm a bit worried about this, as well as having time for doulas to get here, and my older kids to get to where they need to be.

OK- so to the actual point. My midwife called tonight, and said that with all things considered, she'd like to come tomorrow, check me and make sure it's safe, and then break my water and get this thing going. She is quite sure it will put me into labor with no problems, and no risk. I'm not so sure I believe this-- I've always been pretty non-interventionist--and to me, there's always risks when intervening in childbirth, especially when there's not a good medical reason to do so. I fear these risks, that she is telling me aren't there. Besides something going wrong, I fear how much faster and intense the labor is likely to be. Balancing out this fear from the other side is the fear of being pregnant, getting more exhausted for another week (or two), starting labor in the middle of a storm, or when my husband is at work, having no one to take my kids, etc... There is something attractive about being able to know when it will start and being prepared for it.

The one thought that is really bothering me, that I can't figure out is this-- If I agree to this, have I somehow failed? It's still a natural homebirth. I don't understand why I feel like I might have failed somehow. But the feeling is there. I'm confused by it.

Also, I'm bothered by the pressure I'm feeling from my midwife to do this. She's leaving it up to dh and me, it's ultimately our choice. But she's made her preferences clear, and I'm a little blown away that I'm having to consider this with a homebirth midwife at all.

So there it is, and like I said, I'm just plain confused. I don't know what is the right thing to do- and I feel like I have equal amounts of fear either way. I can't quiet myself enough to hear what I am telling myself to do!

-Low risk "induction" for mostly convenience, and not for anything medically necessary?
OR
-Hang out and wait, despite the cons that come with that?

Like I said, I'm sorry this is so long- just wanted to get it all out there. I'd love any input you all have- What would you do if you were in my shoes?
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  #2  
January 23rd, 2010, 07:15 PM
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Personally I would hang out and wait. I wouldn't want her to break my waters to try to get things moving faster. My personal feeling is that she shouldn't have taken on so many clients due at the same time, but that might just be my thought.
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  #3  
January 23rd, 2010, 09:54 PM
~*Bethy*~'s Avatar Ian, Morgan and Isabella!
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Its weird that your midwife is pushing an 'induction' - I would wait it out. Your so far dilated - it will happen on its own, I promise - the baby will come out regardless
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  #4  
January 24th, 2010, 12:45 AM
CameraLinds's Avatar Zane & Jude's mama
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I agree with the other ladies. I'm surprised she took on so many patients due around the same time.
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  #5  
January 24th, 2010, 07:39 AM
inyourhonor's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I agree as well, I'd wait it out. If I wanted inductions I'd go to the hospital. I hope your Little One comes soon for you on their own.
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  #6  
January 24th, 2010, 09:09 AM
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Thank you all! That really helped!

We've decided to wait the storm out, she's going to check me tomorrow, and if there's been progress since my last check, I'm going to try the breast pump. Maybe castor oil-- eeek.... But I'm really not ok with the amniotomy idea- which I think is a bit frustrating for her. But she's respecting it for now.

But I did learn some scary stuff about my midwife in our conversation today:

1) When I mentioned my concern about contractions not starting after my water was broken and having to transfer for pitocin, she said "Nah, we'd just put some cytotec up there!"

2) I guess she NEVER allows anyone to go past 42 weeks, even with monitoring, even if everyone is still doing fine. So my clock is ticking...

3) But we have no idea how much time is left. I have "due dates" ranging from the 13th to the 24th. She has no idea which one to use.

This lady is starting to scare the crud out of me....
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  #7  
January 24th, 2010, 09:54 AM
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I would be a bit scared of her as well after learning that info. Hopefully, labor fully starts on its own for you shortly! And I would insist on using the latest due date to give you the most time (so the 24th).
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  #8  
January 24th, 2010, 12:10 PM
Adam&Kaydence'sMommy's Avatar formerly wiseg2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by flamingpeachfish View Post
Thank you all! That really helped!

We've decided to wait the storm out, she's going to check me tomorrow, and if there's been progress since my last check, I'm going to try the breast pump. Maybe castor oil-- eeek.... But I'm really not ok with the amniotomy idea- which I think is a bit frustrating for her. But she's respecting it for now.

But I did learn some scary stuff about my midwife in our conversation today:

1) When I mentioned my concern about contractions not starting after my water was broken and having to transfer for pitocin, she said "Nah, we'd just put some cytotec up there!"

2) I guess she NEVER allows anyone to go past 42 weeks, even with monitoring, even if everyone is still doing fine. So my clock is ticking...

3) But we have no idea how much time is left. I have "due dates" ranging from the 13th to the 24th. She has no idea which one to use.

This lady is starting to scare the crud out of me....
Wow. If it were me I would not use her again after this pregnancy.

I also do not believe in interventions unless they are medically necessary. The baby will come out on its own. Try to be patient, I know how hard that sounds but you're almost there!
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  #9  
January 24th, 2010, 02:00 PM
lilflower
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I posted on the other thread you started.

I hope you go into labor on your own and soon. I wouldn't be comfortable being induced either...and as for the cytotec...I'm almost 100% sure that you can't use that outside of the hospital because of the chance of uterine rupture. EEk. I'd wait it out and if she doesn't make it...she doesn't make it. Good luck!
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  #10  
January 24th, 2010, 05:56 PM
Twinkle's Avatar Platinum Super Mommy
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Location: New York
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Oh hun! I agree, I think you made the right decision to wait it out. At 41 weeks with my last baby, I started with the breast pump, and it definitely helped. I bought the castor oil, but didn't end up using it!

I do hope that the breast pump does help! I did 10-15 minutes on it, then 20 minutes off, and back again. Its worth a shot...

I agree about not wanting to use this m/w again... its one thing to suggest "coaxing" a baby out after 40 weeks, things like nipple stimulation, acupuncture, etc.... but its a whole different thing to suggest PROM and cyotec. Thats just crazy to me.
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  #11  
January 24th, 2010, 06:38 PM
inyourhonor's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Metro Detroit
Posts: 17,591
Oh wow I would definitely re-think recommending her to others since you said that this baby is your last!

It's a home birth, you're not supposed to go for the hospital inductions and methods. That just seems like something an OB would be willing to do, not a HB midwife.

Keep us posted on everything and good luck!
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  #12  
January 25th, 2010, 07:32 PM
Effervescence's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Posts: 6,791
I didn't have enough advice to chime in earlier, but I'm wondering how things are going now?

I think I'd lock myself in my closet if my midwife said she was going to use cytotec! I've heard that it's definitely NOT safe, even in hospitals.
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  #13  
January 26th, 2010, 06:35 AM
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Ya-- I think I would rather transfer to a hospital for pitocin rather than let her anywhere near me with cytotec, if it came to that...

I've been given til Friday to get this baby out, or she'll have to transfer care- so it's induction either way, unfortunately. The baby looks healthy, other than it hates my right side. I spent a couple hours on the pump yesterday and started getting some really good contractions, so my midwife said to go take a shower to see if they'd keep going-- they kinda stopped, picked back up again and stuck around for another three hours at 6 min. apart before up and disappearing. Frustrating. But I'm hopeful today will be easier- I'm sure 6 hours of laboring yesterday had to have done something to move this along...

I feel pretty bad that I'm having to go this route, but I figure at this point it's better than AROM with the risk of having cytotec shoved at me, or transferring to the hospital for induction there... sigh... why can't they just once toss their stupid "policies" out the window, realize this baby is perfectly healthy and leave me alone?!
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  #14  
January 27th, 2010, 04:53 AM
CameraLinds's Avatar Zane & Jude's mama
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: UK
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I know what boat you are in right now....I was in a similar position when DS was late....MW had me see the back up OB for an u/s to check everything and I was given a week to have him....so of course we decided to go thru with the natural inducers instead of waiting and possibly end up in the hospital for induction. We knew the natural inducers were safer than being induced...so MW stripped my membranes and stretched me, the next night I took i believe 2-4oz castor oil with OJ the first night, next day did blue cohosh and another dose of castor oil and oj and then still nothing, was on the breast pump for hours, no luck, DTD, took lots of walks, then 3 days after the castor oil I had labor inducing acupuncture done- I got contractions an hour after leaving and I had spicy chicken wings for dinner. DS was born 26 hours after acupuncture.
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  #15  
January 27th, 2010, 04:10 PM
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Ooh- that's hopeful- I have an appointment with an accupuncturist in the morning before the midwife appointment of doom. Absolutely the last thing I can possibly think of, so I'm very pleased to hear it worked for you!

...Did it hurt very much? I guess that's kind of a silly question, but I've always been scared to go since getting plugged full of needles doesn't look pleasant at all!
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  #16  
January 27th, 2010, 05:01 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by flamingpeachfish View Post
This might end up kind of long- but I want to make sure everything gets in here. I'm just confused, and can't hear what my intuition is saying... wondered what you all would do in my situation.

I'm only two days past due, but my original due date was the 13th, so emotionally, I feel way more post term than I am. I don't do pregnancy gracefully- I've never really liked the feeling of having a person growing in me (forgive me, but to me, the feeling is more "leechlike"). This is also my third baby, and it's been a rough pregnancy. I feel done. Like I can't do anymore. Actually I feel a lot the way Frodo must have felt trying to get up that last bit of mountain with the ring.
I so totally feel 100% the same way about pregnancy!

Quote:
As of last check, I am 4-5cm's, 60%, -2, and somewhere between posterior and anterior, and very soft. This is normal for the way I labor- I was 4cm's for close to a month with both my other two before I went into labor. But until today, I wasn't experiencing much for other signs of impending labor. Just today I've started passing some bits of plug and my bh's have changed- still very infrequent and irregular, but at least more "real contraction" in feeling. Makes me think that I have made some more progress from my last check.

Other pertinent bits of info--- I haven't been able to sleep all day today or last night. My heartburn is awful and I keep choking on stomach acid whenever I drift off to sleep. I am exhausted, and I fear going into labor more exhausted than I am now.

There is a storm on the way- already twice this winter we have had storms that have shut down the interstates. I don't think I need to fear this happening with this storm, but the possibility is there, and it will at least make travel slower for my midwife, and for us if for some reason we'd have to transfer.

My midwife has two other women due NOW, like me. Between the weather and these women, she's concerned about not being able to make it to all the births.

My last labor was 4 hours total, and only about an hour of it was serious enough to make me believe it was actually labor. My midwife at the time was coming from 4 blocks away and still only made it with 20 minutes to spare. My midwife this time is coming from 10-30 miles away. I'm a bit worried about this, as well as having time for doulas to get here, and my older kids to get to where they need to be.

OK- so to the actual point. My midwife called tonight, and said that with all things considered, she'd like to come tomorrow, check me and make sure it's safe, and then break my water and get this thing going. She is quite sure it will put me into labor with no problems, and no risk. I'm not so sure I believe this-- I've always been pretty non-interventionist--and to me, there's always risks when intervening in childbirth, especially when there's not a good medical reason to do so. I fear these risks, that she is telling me aren't there. Besides something going wrong, I fear how much faster and intense the labor is likely to be. Balancing out this fear from the other side is the fear of being pregnant, getting more exhausted for another week (or two), starting labor in the middle of a storm, or when my husband is at work, having no one to take my kids, etc... There is something attractive about being able to know when it will start and being prepared for it.
Do you know what station baby is at? Because making the decision to break your labor when baby is super low is a lot easier, because the risks when baby is higher are increased.

Quote:
The one thought that is really bothering me, that I can't figure out is this-- If I agree to this, have I somehow failed? It's still a natural homebirth. I don't understand why I feel like I might have failed somehow. But the feeling is there. I'm confused by it.
I understand this one too, thought my situation is different. I knew I wanted a natural (hospital) birth with my last baby. I ended up having a very bad day and asked them to induce me, because of a mistake made by the nurse and I just wanted it over then. I still did it without any drugs, but I knew that made it not "natural."

Quote:
Also, I'm bothered by the pressure I'm feeling from my midwife to do this. She's leaving it up to dh and me, it's ultimately our choice. But she's made her preferences clear, and I'm a little blown away that I'm having to consider this with a homebirth midwife at all.
Yeah, that is really sad

Quote:
So there it is, and like I said, I'm just plain confused. I don't know what is the right thing to do- and I feel like I have equal amounts of fear either way. I can't quiet myself enough to hear what I am telling myself to do!

-Low risk "induction" for mostly convenience, and not for anything medically necessary?
OR
-Hang out and wait, despite the cons that come with that?

Like I said, I'm sorry this is so long- just wanted to get it all out there. I'd love any input you all have- What would you do if you were in my shoes?
I would talk about it more with your midwife before I made a decision at this point.
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