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  #1  
July 5th, 2011, 01:04 PM
THE angry uterus
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I guess I should start out with, I don't care to have a home birth, but I do want less interventions at the start of my pregnancy. I don't want to go in for an appointment until I'm between 16-20ish weeks, and I would like to maybe monitor my own pregnancy up until then and in between? I would also like to skip from about 20 wks until about 26, then to 32, and if then see how I'm feeling about going in every week or every two weeks.

Has anyone else considered this, or done this? I am Rh- and went into preterm labor with DS who is Rh+. I delivered on his due date, but I also have had issues with bleeding (PP) with the last two pregnancies. I'm wondering if I should go in for an early first appointment for the RH factor blood work, then skip until week 20? I've already tried talking to my OB about this and it was a big FAIL (no surprise).

I find all the appointments very stressful and I hate going to them. I AM all up for the ultrasound/s, but no so much the weights, the BPs, the fetal HBs (which I could do all this on my own), the peeing in a cup, etc. When I tried to get my doc to tell me why I needed to go in so much early on, she said it was very important, but really could not explain (at least for me to understand) why it really was so important. Her big thing about the weight was "well, if you aren't gaining enough, we would see if you just don't have enough money to get food, or what other reason there is" Really? If I didn't have enough money for food, what would she personally do about it? Whatever.

Anyway, I'm rambling. We are wttc until next year, but when we do get pregnant I think I would like to be ready and know what I want before I get bullied or coerrsed into doing something I don't want to do. So, I was thinking I would start an excel chart of my weekly weight, BP, and I would need to order urine dip sticks... What else would I need?

Last edited by THE angry uterus; July 9th, 2011 at 04:34 PM.
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  #2  
July 5th, 2011, 05:09 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2010
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Since you aren't planning a homebirth you may find more people in your situation on the Natural Childbirth Board. The is a section here for unassisted childbirth, but that generally involves being at home.
My only other suggestion for you would be to dump your OB and see a midwife who are generally more willing to adjust to your wishes(as long as they are still within the law which may require certain appointments)
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  #3  
July 5th, 2011, 05:23 PM
THE angry uterus
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I was thinking about that, but I thought you ladies would know more about not going in. Its not the childbirth that I'm wanting to know more about, its less prenatal care in general. I am planning on ditching my OB for a midwife, but the hospital/birthing center I want to deliver at doesn't allow for midwife deliveries. The ones that do I'm a little torn on cause I believe it allows for a waterbirth and midwife deliveries, but after two hours, they ship you to another room. Anyway, I just was wondering if anyone could help be find resources for providing my own prenatal care.

Thanks.
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  #4  
July 5th, 2011, 05:43 PM
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With my first MW, their practice didn't take weight at all. They said that as long as you're eating healthy (and trust me, they nagged!) they didn't worry about how much/little you gained.

For my first PG, I was not technically allowed to see a MW until I was 36 weeks. (Because of my work situation) But I did call as soon as I was PG and had a few appointments with them until my transfer of care at 36 weeks. I was able to choose when I wanted to see them, and I wanted to meet both MWs who were supposed to be there for the birth, so I booked 2 appointments. (one with each) At 36 weeks, I started my weekly appointments until I delivered. BUT, I was seeing an OB before 36 weeks. I don't think it really mattered to the MWs whether or not I was seeing an OB beforehand, but they did want copies of certain tests. You might want to see one early on in your PG for a couple of reasons. One, so that you can get all of your government paperwork started. (We have a ton to do here anyways, not sure about the States) Two, so that you can find out what tests they might require, since you can't exactly draw your own blood or do up a lab request. Same for U/S. Three, MWs book up quickly. Or at least the good ones do. You want to lock one in while the pickings are still good!
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  #5  
July 9th, 2011, 02:54 PM
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You may want to check out the unassisted board. While we are having homebirths, we do see our midwives (most in our homes) for the required prenatals visits. We also do the recommended u/s and bloodwork.
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  #6  
July 9th, 2011, 04:33 PM
THE angry uterus
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NishaG View Post
You may want to check out the unassisted board. While we are having homebirths, we do see our midwives (most in our homes) for the required prenatals visits. We also do the recommended u/s and bloodwork.
I have to go for the blood work because of my Rh factor, and I would never want to skip out on the ultrasounds. I just don't want to go every month, or if I did, I would like to be more involved in my care.

I'm sorry, I will mark this post for deletion. I'm not seeming to quite get what I mean across.
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  #7  
July 9th, 2011, 05:17 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by THE angry uterus View Post
I have to go for the blood work because of my Rh factor, and I would never want to skip out on the ultrasounds. I just don't want to go every month, or if I did, I would like to be more involved in my care.

I'm sorry, I will mark this post for deletion. I'm not seeming to quite get what I mean across.
Well, you what you may want indeed is a homebirth. I don't see any other way for you to be more involved.
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  #8  
July 9th, 2011, 07:47 PM
navywifey2003's Avatar Home Birth Mama
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I will tell you my experience with a midwife and our home birth thus far.

We are not going unassisted we will have a midwife attended home birth by 2 midwifes and 2 of their students.

I saw her once a month starting at 12 weeks. Each of my appointments were/are 1 hour. We go in sit on a couch and its an open forum. We chat about anything and everything from pregnancy to how my family is doing, if we are doing anything fun for the weekend. ect. About the last 20 minutes of my appointment she has me go to the bathroom weigh myself then we sit chat a bit more, then she takes my BP and listens to the babies HB. Most of the time my kids help out with both. They both have gotten very good at finding their baby brother's HB. Its adorable. I will see her next week and then at my home for my 36 week visit. Where she will do my GBS swab etc. Its always my choice on what lab work I want done. We talk about it what she thinks and how I am feeling about it. If its not something I want to do she is okay with that because it is my care and my choice. I love the experience my family has had with her and I cant wait to have her there for our delivery. I hope this helps!

Also. I dont pee in a cup at any appointments only when we thought I had a UTI so it was a quick dip. With the midwives we see you are the advocate in your care I am sure if I wanted to adjust how much I went in that would be possible.
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Last edited by navywifey2003; July 9th, 2011 at 07:51 PM.
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  #9  
July 9th, 2011, 11:07 PM
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I know you want it deleted, but this is turning into quite an interesting thread. It seems you maybe should go the homebirth route. Is there a reason you aren't considering one?

As far as my midwife the only tests that were required were a dating ultrasound at about 8 weeks because I had very irregular periods and we didn't know a due date. Also an HIV/Aids test as my midwife won't work with anyone who is positive. Other than that all tests have been optional(and I've opted out of them).

Scheduling has gone something like this:
6 weeks: initial meeting, just talk, learn about midwife, asked us what we wanted. Took about an hour, very nice meeting
7 weeks: decided to use her, met again to go over paperwork and legal stuff, got script to get dating ultrasound
9 weeks: results of ultrasound in, HIV bloodwork, met to go over scheduling for the rest of pregnancy
14 weeks: blood pressure, pee, hear baby heartbeat, measure belly, take weight, talk
19 weeks: same as above
24 weeks: same as above
30 weeks: same as above
33 weeks: same as above
35 weeks: same as above
Will meet again at 37 weeks and weekly until baby arrives. Appointments are as long or short as we want them.

It's really no big deal and she comes to our house some of the time. I understand you saying appointments with an OB to be stressful. I 100% agree, which is why I'm not using one! Homebirth midwives are totally different. Talking to her about your stress level is something you could go over, it's the reason many women don't want to go to hospitals.

The blood work and stuff is done for legal reasons. Not only so my midwife doesn't lose her license, but also in the case of a hospital transfer the OB will need the information.

Good luck to you in finding the information you want. Please don't get too frustrated and run off, we are trying to be helpful.
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  #10  
July 10th, 2011, 06:43 AM
THE angry uterus
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I don't want a home birth for many reasons. For one, the thought of having anyone in my home stresses me out. When I was on bedrest with my son, I didn't want anyone coming over cause I still feel like I have to "entertain". In entertaining, I would have to clean. Extensively. DH tries desperately to be a hoarder and I'm often too embarrassed by the clutter to have people over (although he is getting better). Another reason, I don't want to have to worry about cleaning up any messes. Maybe it wont be messy. Most likely it will, and again, I don't want someone else cleaning my house. I would feel like a bad 'host'. This brings me back on to PP hemorrhage. I have a history of extensive heavy PP bleeding that has had to be treated. Then there is my Rh factor. Because baby will be Pos, and I'm negative, at some point I will have to have blood drawn and sent to get my Rhogam shot and to see how much I get. To be honest, I have no problem with hospitals, I work at one, although I wouldn't want to deliver at the one I work as since I work with those ladies all the time and they don't need to be checking out my whoohoo. I would like a doula, but then even in the hospital I have that 'I need to entertain' mentality and would probably feel like I had to be a good host for her... The final reason I don't want a home birth is, DH would NOT go for it. Actually if DH did go for it, I would consider it more closely.

The reason I don't want to go in for my appointments again is because it is stressful. Someone coming to my house would probably be worse for me. I can monitor my own BP (and in doing so it wouldn't be elevated), I can weigh myself, I can monitor the baby's HR, I can measure my own fundal height, if needed I can do my own urine dip sticks. I feel like whenever I go in I'm being judged. This will be my fifth pregnancy and we might have another after this one, but we aren't sure yet. I'm tired of having the tubal talks, tired of the birth control talks, tired of the looks I get, the tones they use although they don't always realize they are using them...

I would like to see the CNM at my docs office, but I don't know if she will take me with my prior history. Honestly, I have no idea who would deliver my future baby, so who sees me (or doesn't) isn't an issue when I'm pregnant since I likely wont see them for the delivery of the baby. (CNMs aren't allowed to deliver at the hospital I want deliver at)

At the same time I would also like to learn about an 'unplanned' home birth, what to expect, what to do... I also have a history of a fast birth. I went from 5cm to delivered in 5 minutes (3 contractions) and she was 7#7oz. throw that in with my history of preterm labor and I feel like I should plan for something like that to happen, although the thought of having a baby in my tiny bathtub creeps me out with the coodies in it.

So, what I guess I really need to know if which appointments I can skip since they wont say, "go ahead, these ones aren't important". I thought an early one since I would have to have the blood work to see if there is an incompatibility and if I'm trying to fight the baby's blood off. Then I wanted to skip until 16-20 weeks when I would get the anatomy scan. I'm not interested in the quad screen, so I can skip that (would love to not have the pressure to get it though). Then I wanted to go in 6-8 weeks later then 6 weeks after that. I wouldn't mind following the routine schedule at the end.

So:
1st visit: 6-8 wks
2nd visit:16-20 wks
3rd visit: 26-28 wks
4th: 32 wks and routine here after OR 36, 38, 39, 40, etc.

Quote:
Originally Posted by navywifey2003 View Post
Also. I dont pee in a cup at any appointments only when we thought I had a UTI so it was a quick dip. With the midwives we see you are the advocate in your care I am sure if I wanted to adjust how much I went in that would be possible.
What about the glucose testing? How important do you feel that to be? I don't have a history of it, and there is no family history of diabetes in the family, excpect my paternal aunts. I guess I'm not opposed to it, but I'd rather not have it if I didn't need to (again that needle phobia of mine. lol)
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  #11  
July 10th, 2011, 07:13 AM
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: TEXAS
Posts: 6,494
It seems like you probably just need to interview different care providers to find out which ones will be more lenient on letting you skip appointments, testing, etc. Again my midwife is way more lenient on this than I have found OBs to be. I interviewed somewhere around 5-6 OBs and once I met with a midwife I realized I had been looking in the wrong place.

Since you do have a history of PP hemorage and that is a factor for you not considering a homebirth I would obviously call an ambulance should you deliver that quickly at home.

I opt out of almost all the testing but the original blood work to test for HIV (for the midwives) and then I get the 20 weeks fetal scan. Everything else glucose test, more blood work, etc. I skip. But when I had an OB with my first I was not "allowed" to opt out of any testing.

Anyways I would ask people around your area and interview potential providers to see who will let you do what on your own. I hope you find someone. Good luck!
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  #12  
July 10th, 2011, 08:47 AM
THE angry uterus
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I figured out what I want! An unassisted pregnancy! (only I actually want a minimally assisted, I believe it still falls under the same category?) I haven't found too much info but I did find some about scheduling frequency to check yourself, etc. The information I found was minimally helpful, but so far its a start and gives me information to research further.

I live in a small town, and even the larger towns around me aren't really a) midwife friendly b) NFP/FAM friendly. I'm a nurse extern on a postpartum unit and most of the mothers send their newborns to the nursery. Can you imagine? Anyway, the point I'm getting at is the community is slow to pick up and adjust to change. If the community is slow to change, so are the doctors and midwives.

Anyway, thank you for your input ladies.
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  #13  
July 10th, 2011, 10:47 AM
navywifey2003's Avatar Home Birth Mama
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Again with the midwives you choose what tests you want and what you dont. The glucose test for me was a breakfast instead of the drink. Im RH- but so is my husband but as a precaution baby will be tested at birth and my midwife will give me rhogram if I need it (which I know I wont). I dont have to go else where for tests or anything she draws my blood at her appointments (if I want or if its needed) and sends it off to the lab. Im sure a midwife would be more likely to understand your wishes than an OB.
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  #14  
July 10th, 2011, 11:41 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by THE angry uterus View Post
I figured out what I want! An unassisted pregnancy! (only I actually want a minimally assisted, I believe it still falls under the same category?) I haven't found too much info but I did find some about scheduling frequency to check yourself, etc. The information I found was minimally helpful, but so far its a start and gives me information to research further.

I live in a small town, and even the larger towns around me aren't really a) midwife friendly b) NFP/FAM friendly. I'm a nurse extern on a postpartum unit and most of the mothers send their newborns to the nursery. Can you imagine? Anyway, the point I'm getting at is the community is slow to pick up and adjust to change. If the community is slow to change, so are the doctors and midwives.

Anyway, thank you for your input ladies.

So will you still go to the hospital to birth or how would you go about that? Im curious.
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Pierce 11/28/2009 (midwife at freestanding birth center)
and Surprise Baby #4 due 11/13/2011
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  #15  
July 11th, 2011, 05:09 PM
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With my midwife, I'm doing the tradition timing of appointments. However, she told me that I can choose to see her as often or infrequently as I want. As for labs, I do only the ones I want. I chose to do the beginning of PG bloodwork, and the ultrasound. I'll do the GD test - although my test will be drinking grape juice at home and hour before our appointment followed by a finger prick test. I've never peed in a cup, and I tell her my weight if I've weighed myself recently. All that I do is BP, fundal measurement, and listening to the baby, then sit around visiting for an hour.

As for your situation...I would find the OB/Midwife that you want for your hospital birth, and then just make it to the the appointments you want. So, go in for the first one, get the labs done. Don't schedule the next one on your way out. If they insist, push it back as far as you can - due to "conflicts", and then call later to cancel and reschedule for a later time. Then you can continue to monitor yourself in the meantime.

Or, just don't see an OB until you're at least 20-something weeks. Take care of yourself until then.

I agree with you, though. I think we have a lot more appointments than needed.
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  #16  
July 11th, 2011, 07:56 PM
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I think with any provider you can control your own appointments and test. Like someone said above, you just have to stand up for yourself or find one that agrees to it.

I've had very minimal appointements with my midwife. I had my first at the birth center (hoping for a home birth with the midwives there) at 16 weeks. Then I didn't see my new midwife until 20 weeks. I've only had 3 appointments since then, about 5-6 weeks apart, so similiar to what you posted. It wasn't intended that way, but with vacations and holidays, we couldn't schedule them every 4 weeks. It worked out well for us too, since we pay per appointment, so it saved us money by skipping one. I knew that if I had any issues, I could call my midwife, but it wouldn't hurt to go 1-2 weeks more in between routine appointments as long as I wasn't having any issues.

Quote:
So:
1st visit: 6-8 wks
2nd visit:16-20 wks
3rd visit: 26-28 wks
4th: 32 wks and routine here after OR 36, 38, 39, 40, etc.
A lot of doctors (based on what I've seen in my DDCs) are backing off on the early appointments. Many women aren't seeing thier doctors until around 12-16 weeks for the first time, so that's very common in a lot of pregnancies now.

There really is so little that is done at appointments, if you wanted to space them out to every 5-6 weeks, or even more, I can't imagine it would cause problems. We do the same with our well-baby visits since we don't vaccinate, so we skip most of the appointments and only do 2-3 in the first year. Like our doctor said, if there's a problem, we can call him, but there's no point in coming in every 2 months when we have a perfectly healthy child. You know your body and you will know if there's a problem and you need to go in, the monthly appointments are just a formality. I probably wouldnt' feel comfortable skipping them altogether, but I don't see anything wrong with spacing them out more. If you did have a doctor that gave you a hard time, you can just claim "scheduling conflicts" and that you can't schedule them any closer.

Good luck! We would love to have you come over to the NCB board too, many of the women there are very natural-minded and also choose less invasive prenatal care with both midwives and OBs. You might be suprised at how much you in have in common with us all
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  #17  
July 14th, 2011, 09:27 PM
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What you are asking of an OB or midwife is to risk increasing his/her liability to suit your wishes. Some will be willing to do that, most won't. You'll have to search around until you find someone. Then you need to keep in mind that they are taking a legal risk in accommodating you. Yes, you can take your own measurements, but unless recorded by the provider or their staff themselves, taking your word for your own measurements wouldn't hold up in a court of law if something bad happened during your pregnancy (not likely to happen, but there is always that chance). Even home birth midwives vary widely in what they are willing to let you waive versus what they require. For example, some home birth midwives have no problem with women opting out of almost all testing, but mine require the GD testing because they don't want to take the liability of not diagnosing GD and running into problems at delivery. You'll get the same variation in traditional practices, and the only way to find out is to actually call around.
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  #18  
July 14th, 2011, 09:53 PM
navywifey2003's Avatar Home Birth Mama
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Also when I was saw at the naval hospital with an OB it was every 6 weeks until 36 weeks and every other week until 40.
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