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What was DH's reaction to homebirth?


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  #1  
February 16th, 2007, 06:33 PM
mouse_1203's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I was just curious. Mine is all for a natural birth, but no way on the home birth. I've listed off some of the benefits to him, but he feels that we are too far from a hospital if something would happen. We live about 20 miles from the hospital. What did you ladies do to talk him into it?
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  #2  
February 16th, 2007, 07:01 PM
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my Dh was very supportive,

we kind of have only 2 options,

homebirth or risk giving birth in the car on the way to the hospital, as we live about 40 mins form the cloesest hospital and I have really short labours,

ok 3 options, I could move into the hospital from 36wks intilll the babys born lol,

so DH was happy with my choice to have a home birth,
he still has his moments when he's really worried, that the midwife wopnt arrive in time, or he wont arrive in time eitehr,
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  #3  
February 16th, 2007, 07:18 PM
Lash's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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20 miles doesnt sound too far away, but maybe thats just me.. it takes 30 mins to prep for a section, so you could probably still get there in time if complications arose

dh was hesitant, but totally listened to the research, and now even defends it to other people
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  #4  
February 16th, 2007, 11:40 PM
Acadia's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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My DF is all for natural but he would really like me to have a midwife while I want to try UC. By the time I have a baby we will be quite a ways from the nearest hospital ... an hour and 15 minutes driving normally or 50 minutes driving like a crazy person.

But that's kind of the same thing ... going to a birth center or the hospital after I go into labor isn't any guarantee that I'd get there in time. And if I didn't get there in time, we'd still want to be prepared to do it ourselves because we're so far away, kwim? I guess he's kind of conflicted about it.
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  #5  
February 17th, 2007, 08:02 AM
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I think after four hospital births, DH was really as easily convinced about homebirth as I was. He was worried about all the "what ifs" (that male protector thing), but I think what helped the most was realizing that finally HE would be able to take a primary role in welcoming our baby to the world. He wasn't just an accessory on the sidelines with the camera for our homebirths. He was an active part of helping me deliver our baby, and he loved it because he knew how much I wanted and needed HIM to share our babies' births with me.
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  #6  
February 18th, 2007, 07:26 AM
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When I first brought it up, he was totally against it. We had a few arguments about it and it was stressing me out. So I strategically placed books about Homebirth in the bathroom. He'll read anything that's in there, so he ended up doing his own research and eventually came around to the idea.
After our first homebirth, he became an advocate and tells expecting friends the joys of homebirth. Unfortunately we had some issues with our second homebirth and transfered to the hospital so now he is hestitant again. Guess I'll have to put those books back in the bathroom.
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  #7  
February 18th, 2007, 12:54 PM
abigailsilva's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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He was pretty suportive from the begining. I just explained to him that this was somehting I felt very strongly about and i NEEDED him to at least try to understand. Once he met the midwife, though, he was all over it. We had our little boy three days ago and he's already telling people that there is no way we will ever go to the hospital again.

In the "convincing DH" section there is a wonderful "poop analogy" by shawnacan, that is particularly convincing.

If he's supportive of a natural delivery then ask him why you need a hospital? What is natural about going to a place for sick people for birth?
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  #8  
February 18th, 2007, 03:22 PM
Lash's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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i agree totally, that analogy is very good, and one that i actually used to convince dh! he TOTALLY got it after that
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  #9  
February 22nd, 2007, 08:57 PM
mouse_1203's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Thanks ladies! Abigail, congrats on your new baby! I totally love the idea of placing books strategically in the bathroom...I may have to use that and the analogy when we talk about it again. Thanks again!
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