Log In Sign Up

Looking for a midwife


Forum: Home Birth

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Home Birth LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
April 22nd, 2007, 08:12 PM
Fluffy Baby's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: SW FL
Posts: 8,785
My last pregnancy I was totally wanting a natural birth at my birthing center. My daughter decided to take her time and at my 42nd week check up, my fluid was low.( Then I was sent to her, my midwifes, back up OBGYN according to the law, I guess) I had did all the research possible, so I thought on being pregnant. I was against any interventions. Then when the OB started talking about the baby dieing because she had no room, it totally freaked me out and I agreed to be induced. After 2.5 days of labor with pitocin, heartrate went crazy I was knocked out since I didn't have an epi for an emergency c section. I hated myself (and still do sometimes) for letting him talk me into it. Now I find myself pregnant again. She was 6 months old. Totally not planned, was using so many preventions. I almost aborted (which I would never dream of doing) since it was so close and I am still dealing with my failures. It hurts me to this day. Now I want to try a VBAC, my family and friends are not supportive. Either they had their natural labors and shrugged off my c/s as if it doesn't matter or they had c/s and wouldn't have it any other way, of course none of them got to experience both. Anyways, I want a VBAC and of course the only doctor in my area that does them is my OB that did the c/s. Right now I am with him to get my prenatal visits. The midwife I had won't see me because of the C/s. The OB wants to do another one since it is so close. I don't know what to do. I am terrified of delivery. I tried to tie my tubes after Alyssa, but the doctors wouldn't let me. I refuse to go through that horrendous experince again. I live in florida.

Is there somewhere I can find the state law about pregnancy and delivery?

Does anyone know of a midwife or someone that could help me in the ft myers area?

Any advice or words of comfort or wisdom?

I get conflicting answers about uterine rupture since the pregnancies are so close. It is so depressing.

TIA.




I also want to say that you gals are so brave and really inspire.
__________________
Leann <3 Hector
My trio: Alyssa 7, Tristan 4.75, Gavin 1.5

I am a mixture of all that and a bag of chips... IJS



Rest In Peace Jennifer <3



Reply With Quote
  #2  
April 23rd, 2007, 07:18 AM
UrbanMomma's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Somewhere near Detroit, MI
Posts: 8,672
Send a message via Yahoo to UrbanMomma
Well, I had my 4th son via (unnecessary) c/section back in 2001. He was 9 months old when I was pg again. I was told by an OB that I was not a "good risk" for VBAC because the pg's were to close and the risk of rupture was great. I couldn't believe they wanted to cut me open again. My first three births were all normal vaginal births, only the first with any meds.

I didn't take their answer as my only option. I knew I could have a successful VBAC, but I couldn't find an willing OB's. So I found a wonderful homebirth MW and had an awesome VBAC at home.

I think the risk of uterine rupture is more if you have hospital interventions, but overall the risk is slim. There are ways you can strengthen your uterus too...like RRL tea.

So a VBAC is possible. I think you have to stay positive, believe your body can birth your baby, that your body will not make a baby too big for you to deliver...and remember EDD's are just guesses.


Do you want to deliver in the hospital or are you willing to try a birth center or home?

Find a MW
You can try that link to possibly find a MW.

ICAN
Ceserean Awareness Group


Good luck, stay positive and there are lots of great ladies here who may even know more info to helpyou and point you in the right direction.
__________________
Jenifer....The Queen Bee
#12 is on the way
Reply With Quote
  #3  
April 23rd, 2007, 09:02 PM
abigailsilva's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 4,103
Just remember, NO ONE can make you have a c-section, by law they are not allowed to interupt birth in it's natural form, or stop it from progressing, vaginal birth is the natural progression, the c-sec is the treament, and if they try to make you against your wishes, it's battery. ILLEGAL. If no one will take you, would you consider UPing? I have info if you want.
__________________
<div align="center"></div>
<div align="center">I HAVE 12 SMILES IN THE JM SWAP SHOP!!!</div>
Reply With Quote
  #4  
April 23rd, 2007, 09:14 PM
MrsPil's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Quad Cities
Posts: 1,305
I don't know so much about the FL state laws, but I know that federal law trumps state and federal legislation all says that what you say absolutely goes. There is a post somewhere around here siting EMTALA, I'll ask Abbey to find it. Also there is something to be said for the empowering nature of UP/UC.
__________________
"I trust birth—not birth attendants—for if you only trust birth that is attended then you really don't trust birth at all. You trust the attendant. And then you start over. Who? Doctor, surgeon, CNM, CPM, SIM? And it goes on and on...." - Carla Hartley
"First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win." -Gandhi
"What good fortune for those in power that people do not think." - Adolph Hitler



Reply With Quote
  #5  
April 24th, 2007, 08:13 PM
Fluffy Baby's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: SW FL
Posts: 8,785
Sorry to sound stupid, but what is UP/UC? That makes me feel better that federal law goes, no matter state law. Thanks for the responses ladies.
__________________
Leann <3 Hector
My trio: Alyssa 7, Tristan 4.75, Gavin 1.5

I am a mixture of all that and a bag of chips... IJS



Rest In Peace Jennifer <3



Reply With Quote
  #6  
April 24th, 2007, 09:05 PM
LaLa's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 11,576
Im in Florida too - what part of fl are you in?

Lala...
__________________




My BBT Chart





DEBT PAY DOWN!!!
Baby Step #1 DONE ($1k in ER savings!)

<a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/debt/wRzFQue/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">

</a>
Reply With Quote
  #7  
April 25th, 2007, 04:08 PM
Fluffy Baby's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: SW FL
Posts: 8,785
I live near Ft Myers in a small town called Labelle.
__________________
Leann <3 Hector
My trio: Alyssa 7, Tristan 4.75, Gavin 1.5

I am a mixture of all that and a bag of chips... IJS



Rest In Peace Jennifer <3



Reply With Quote
  #8  
April 25th, 2007, 07:45 PM
LaLa's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 11,576
Oh ok, Im in NWF

Lala...
__________________




My BBT Chart





DEBT PAY DOWN!!!
Baby Step #1 DONE ($1k in ER savings!)

<a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/debt/wRzFQue/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">

</a>
Reply With Quote
  #9  
April 26th, 2007, 12:36 AM
MrsPil's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Quad Cities
Posts: 1,305
up/uc = unassisted pregnancy and unassisted childbirth. For really nutty folks like moi!
__________________
"I trust birth—not birth attendants—for if you only trust birth that is attended then you really don't trust birth at all. You trust the attendant. And then you start over. Who? Doctor, surgeon, CNM, CPM, SIM? And it goes on and on...." - Carla Hartley
"First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win." -Gandhi
"What good fortune for those in power that people do not think." - Adolph Hitler



Reply With Quote
  #10  
May 11th, 2007, 01:21 PM
Carliegirl's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: New York
Posts: 5,105
I'd say....try the next town over. There's almost got to be somebody in your area who will do a VBAC. I'd be shocked if there truly is nobody. I'd contact your local La Leche League, yoga studios that have prenatal classes, and health food stores. These groups usually can tell you were to find a good midwife or ob who will be natural childbirth friendly and allow you the VBAC you want. It's surprising to me that your midwife won't do it. Bummer. I hope you find someone. I hate to be downer, but the odds of this birth working out for you the way you want with the same obstetrician are slim to none. I'd do everything in my power to get out of his care. Don't give up! You can do this and there are people who believe you can and will help you. Studies prove that VBAC is perfectly safe. I'm proud of you for seeking out some answers!
__________________

Thanks so much for the lovely siggie Trish (mtdk454)!!!!
<a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/weight-loss/wTRLvVI/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">

</a>


Reply With Quote
  #11  
May 11th, 2007, 07:19 PM
Fluffy Baby's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: SW FL
Posts: 8,785
None of the midwives around my area (there are very little) will take a patient after a ceasarean, malpractice insurance I guess. I have contacted ICAN chapter in my area and surrounding areas, they all came back with the same conclusions. I am very dissapointed in caregivers down here. I really can't afford to go far away to have the baby. I am entertaining a homebirth, but my whole family is totally against it and that all the statistics are made up by hippies (please no one take offense, not my words). I would be totally alone in my little birth. My DH would be there, but he is not on board at all either. I still haven't came up with any more alternates since I posted this last.
__________________
Leann <3 Hector
My trio: Alyssa 7, Tristan 4.75, Gavin 1.5

I am a mixture of all that and a bag of chips... IJS



Rest In Peace Jennifer <3



Reply With Quote
  #12  
May 12th, 2007, 08:32 PM
LaLa's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 11,576
Are you open to the idea of a lay midwife? Would you be able to pay the cost for a lay midwife out of pocket since insurance wont cover it (considering FL is a licensing state & doesnt license lay midwives)?

if so, I may have someone who MIGHT consider travelling to you

Lala...
__________________




My BBT Chart





DEBT PAY DOWN!!!
Baby Step #1 DONE ($1k in ER savings!)

<a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/debt/wRzFQue/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">

</a>
Reply With Quote
  #13  
May 13th, 2007, 09:13 PM
MrsPil's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Quad Cities
Posts: 1,305
Quote:
None of the midwives around my area (there are very little) will take a patient after a cesarean, malpractice insurance I guess. I have contacted ICAN chapter in my area and surrounding areas, they all came back with the same conclusions. I am very dissapointed in caregivers down here. I really can't afford to go far away to have the baby. I am entertaining a homebirth, but my whole family is totally against it and that all the statistics are made up by hippies (please no one take offense, not my words). I would be totally alone in my little birth. My DH would be there, but he is not on board at all either. I still haven't came up with any more alternates since I posted this last.[/b]
I LOVE IT! That is the most fantastic thing I've heard of all day long! I'm greatly proud of my "hippie" status, so I'll take that as a huge compliment! I will always encourage UC because I know how well it can work when you let it work. I think that it would be incredibly difficult with no support person around to help you out but I have a feeling that if you can tap into the UC underground you would be able to find someone who would help you exponentially. That said you may also find someone underground who is an "illegal" midwife and willing to attend your birth. Have you looked on bornfree? There are more and more women there all the time who have had UBACS or HBACS and they could encourage you and point you in the right direction. Stay strong, I have a feeling that help will find you soon. Namaste!
__________________
"I trust birth—not birth attendants—for if you only trust birth that is attended then you really don't trust birth at all. You trust the attendant. And then you start over. Who? Doctor, surgeon, CNM, CPM, SIM? And it goes on and on...." - Carla Hartley
"First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win." -Gandhi
"What good fortune for those in power that people do not think." - Adolph Hitler



Reply With Quote
  #14  
May 14th, 2007, 07:48 AM
Fluffy Baby's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: SW FL
Posts: 8,785
Lala,
I am new to this, what is a lay midwife? I could probably afford a chuck of change, but about how much would we be talking? I wouldn't even know where to start guessing a price.


MrsPil,
Is bornfree a website? I will have to check it out. My husband wanted to do a planned repeat csection, ha, over my dead body. Now he understands more about the whole not wanting to do that. He still won't really talk about homebirth. Thanks for the words of encouragement, I am almost 20 weeks and I still have no idea what to do. I live in a small town and my nearest hospital is about 1-1.5 hours away, so I am concerned about something going wrong and having to get to the hospital ASAP.




LeAnn
__________________
Leann <3 Hector
My trio: Alyssa 7, Tristan 4.75, Gavin 1.5

I am a mixture of all that and a bag of chips... IJS



Rest In Peace Jennifer <3



Reply With Quote
  #15  
May 15th, 2007, 09:48 PM
MrsPil's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Quad Cities
Posts: 1,305
Bornfree is a site ran by Laura Shanley, there is a support forum for women who plan UC. It's gotten large recently and there is some serious crunch there (they make me look hardcore mainstream) but the birthing information there is second to none. The main site is http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com/ and the forum is http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com/forums/index.php
It's very much worth a look
__________________
"I trust birth—not birth attendants—for if you only trust birth that is attended then you really don't trust birth at all. You trust the attendant. And then you start over. Who? Doctor, surgeon, CNM, CPM, SIM? And it goes on and on...." - Carla Hartley
"First they ignore you, then they ridicule you, then they fight you, then you win." -Gandhi
"What good fortune for those in power that people do not think." - Adolph Hitler



Reply With Quote
  #16  
May 16th, 2007, 05:44 PM
Acadia's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 8,377
Quote:
I live in a small town and my nearest hospital is about 1-1.5 hours away, so I am concerned about something going wrong and having to get to the hospital ASAP.[/b]
I totally understand. "Small town" is a gross overstatement when you're talking about my hometown ... it's more like my home neighborhood. No grocery stores or gas stations even. Drive an hour one direction, and you end up staring at the Gulf. Drive an hour in the other direction, and you're finally getting to the outskirts of civilization. The hospital? What hospital!? A lot of women rent hotel rooms in "town" so they can be sure they'll make it to the hospital on time! It's an hour and a half if the traffic's good once you get close. That's the hospital I was born at, and I'll just say, my mom doesn't have good things to say about it. The next one, which isn't much better? Another half hour! And the road is terrible the whole way.

Anyway, that's a huge concern of mine too. There's not a midwife to be found anywhere around ... and if there were, she'd be in New Orleans, and have to drive that hour and a half to get to me. So there's no guarantee she'd make it anyway! Since this is my first, I have this fear of something going wrong and not having any idea what to do. I've never given birth. Basically my choices are drive like hell and stop when I get to the bad hospital, because I don't know if I'd make it to the next one, or be at home alone and maybe have to drive like hell anyway.

MrsPil's recommendation of Bornfree is a good one.

My MIL says all kinds of things are made up by hippies.
__________________
<div align="center">




</div>
Reply With Quote
  #17  
May 18th, 2007, 08:45 PM
LaLa's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 11,576
A lay midwife is also known as a traditional midwife. She trained through apprenticeship, under other midwives, but is not licensed. How much - I cant say. I could give a safe range of 2 - 3k at most. She might be willing to work something out. Of course im sure shed want to negotiate in what it woudl cost for her to travel, stay in the area, etc.

You may want to check out some of the natural places even in cities within a 45 -60 mile radius. Start talking to crunchy folks - chiropractors, accupuncturists, Doctors of homeopathy, whatever you can find - ask around. You might find out that you guys have some "under ground MWs" around your way too.

BTW - a lot of folks ask "Why a lay MW? Why wouldnt they be licensed? Arent they qualified? What have they got to hide?" (they typically function & operate in secret).

Well the answer is this: Fl is a licensing state - licensing of MWs is a move by OBs and politicians to limit MWs ability to practice, under what terms they can practice, and it gives them a means of control when they dont operate within their guidelines. Yes, it proves to be beneficial & sets up some good boundaries, but it also imposes some unnecessary boundaries as well.

For example in FL - a MW cannot deliver a baby for a woman (without an OB) who has gained over 50 lbs. She cant deliver twins. She cant deliver babies to women over a certain age. Some of these have somewhat valid ppoints, but some of these also dont necessarily deem a woman to be "high risk" by most medical definitions. The goal is to limit the # of women that qualify for midwifery care. Do OBs want women seeing MWs? NO. No more than your telephone company wants you to switch to another provider.

If your telephone company has $30/month at stake, imagine how your OB is going to be when theres THOUSANDS at stake!

So - a lot of women who are trained MWs refuse to become licensed as a statement more than anything. Its a means of supporting traditional midwifery (Fl also wont license MWs who were trained solely through apprenticeship/traditionally - nor will they allow direct entry MWs to transfer their certification from another state to licensure in FL - another way of restricting the # of MWs - its been 25 odd years since a woman has been able to come in & get licensed as an out of state direct entry - non nurse - MW).

Hope that clears things up.

Lala...
__________________




My BBT Chart





DEBT PAY DOWN!!!
Baby Step #1 DONE ($1k in ER savings!)

<a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/debt/wRzFQue/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">

</a>
Reply With Quote
  #18  
May 28th, 2007, 06:39 PM
abigailsilva's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 4,103
These women have given you great advice alraedy, all I can offer is, YOU GO MAMA, FIGHT FOR YOU HB! I totally would have done it even if DH wasn't on board, although I did have a great MW on my side, and now that I know how it is, there isn't ANYTHING that would stop me in the future. DH now feels the same way. Try to find hombirth meetups in your area, just google it, lots of HB families get together once a month to chat, maybe it would help your husband to talk to other dads who have been through it.
__________________
<div align="center"></div>
<div align="center">I HAVE 12 SMILES IN THE JM SWAP SHOP!!!</div>
Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:25 PM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0