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Forum: Home Birth

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  #1  
January 10th, 2008, 01:04 PM
shadowdweller's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: salt lake, utah
Posts: 2,269
has anyone else had a home birth after what would typically be classified a high-risk pregnancy? i have an incompetent cervix, and my m/w advised me this morning that i need to make an appointment with an ob to discuss doing a cerclage. she is not transferring care, and as long as i stay pregnant until 36 weeks, we will go forward with the home birth. but i'm not feeling like there's really a good place to discuss how i'm feeling. my ddc is great, but concerning this, it's mostly a lot of "oh too bad! but whatever the doctor says goes!" the high risk board is much the same, without the "oh too bad". idk. maybe i'm just being whiny. any thoughts?
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  #2  
January 10th, 2008, 01:15 PM
ShawnaCAN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 11,397
I haven't shared your experience in terms of being high risk, but I can understand being frustrated by the "Thou Shalt Do Whatever the Almighty Doctor Says" kind of mentality. I was the same way with my first and boy have I learned a lot since then!

There's a time and place for what an OB has to offer (like the cerclage), and there's a time and place for what a midwife has to offer (like if you get past 36 weeks). Hang in there! It sounds like you've got the best plan for handling this situation that still preserves the potential for a homebirth.

Lots of hugs! I hope everything works out and that the cerlage takes care of everything so you can get past 36 weeks and have your homebirth!

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  #3  
January 10th, 2008, 04:47 PM
fijimama's Avatar Regular
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 63
I can relate to your frustration regarding others' response about "whatever the doctor says goes." Wise women can and should make informed decisions based on their own hopes, beliefs, and knowledge. It is sad to see so many women hand everything over to a hospital and OB when it comes time to have a baby.

It sounds like you might have a good and trustworthy midwife - putting your safety and baby's safety first. If you decide to see a doctor and perhaps have the cerclage, hopefully he/she will be equally wise, and also understanding of your goal of having a homebirth.

I hope this works out for the best for you!
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  #4  
January 10th, 2008, 06:05 PM
Alison79's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 10,232
You're not being whiny at all! I wasn't considered high risk, but I did go to post dates (42w3d) and nobody could understand why I wanted to continue waiting for my little guy to come on his own. It sounds like you have a wonderful supportive midwife and I hope you make it to 36 weeks and have a great homebirth!
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  #5  
January 10th, 2008, 07:34 PM
*Jackie*
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What they said! You have my support
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  #6  
January 10th, 2008, 09:55 PM
ragmama's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Southern VA
Posts: 40,025
Everyone else has said it so well that all I can offer is a big fat DITTO! It certainly sounds like you have a great plan of care underway, and I hope the cerclage takes care of everything so you can still have your little one at home. Feel free to hang out here all you'd like - you're not at all whiny, and we'd love to have you!
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  #8  
January 11th, 2008, 11:26 AM
shadowdweller's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: salt lake, utah
Posts: 2,269
thanks ladies! it's good to know i have support somewhere!

i know i'm doing what's best for me and my baby. my body is giving me clear signs that it will not be able to keep a baby baking without the extra help, and my m/w agrees. but it's still scary. a cerclage is surgery, so obviously it's not without it's risks...something even my mom has a hard time understanding, and she's had one. plus the problem of finding on ob who will do it without completely taking over my care, because i don't think that is in our best interests. my midwife used to refer to one who was great, very supportive of home birth, but he very recently retired (i'm not the first client with a cerclage she has attended- a big part of why i chose her). oh and let's not even start on the fact that the surgery involves retractors in my vagina

thanks for letting me get it out, i'm sure i'll have more later. and with prayer and a pinch of luck, i'll get to post a beautiful home birth story in july!

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  #9  
January 11th, 2008, 12:24 PM
*Jackie*
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I've always wanted a July baby... *tear* lol, Kailey was born AUGUST 1...little bugger...
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  #10  
January 11th, 2008, 12:30 PM
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Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 589
I have found no support in my DDC. So I know what you mean.

Sounds like you have a good plan in place.
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  #11  
January 11th, 2008, 06:39 PM
shadowdweller's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: salt lake, utah
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Quote:
I've always wanted a July baby... *tear* lol, Kailey was born AUGUST 1...little bugger...[/b]
stinker!!
i actually do NOT want a july baby, idk what i was thinking, lol. i'm in utah, it's HOT in july, and i do not do heat well ever! plus, there are about a zillion july birthdays in my family already, it's going to always be a fight to just have a party for my kid.
don't get me wrong, we planned this pregnancy, i just think maybe the baby fever made me forget a few key points to consider...
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  #12  
January 12th, 2008, 10:33 AM
*Jackie*
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Posts: n/a
Quote:
Quote:
I've always wanted a July baby... *tear* lol, Kailey was born AUGUST 1...little bugger...[/b]
stinker!!
i actually do NOT want a july baby, idk what i was thinking, lol. i'm in utah, it's HOT in july, and i do not do heat well ever! plus, there are about a zillion july birthdays in my family already, it's going to always be a fight to just have a party for my kid.
don't get me wrong, we planned this pregnancy, i just think maybe the baby fever made me forget a few key points to consider...
[/b]
I know what you mean! We are TTC and I want to be pregnant NOW but I do NOT want a kid in the Aug-Dec months, I just don't like those months!! If I am pregnant now, the kiddo will be due in Sept and I hate that month more than ANY month in the year! ARG!!!
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  #13  
January 13th, 2008, 04:22 PM
Butter's Avatar Heather the Mama Duk
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: San Antonio TX
Posts: 28,853
I'm on my second DDC. It's what you make it. I feel plenty supported on there. Sure, most people are having tons of u/s, all the prenatal tests possible, and medicated hospital births, but the June DDC at least is quite open to how I'm doing things. The July 06 PR was the same way. I don't think people who trust their OBs 100% always really understand those who question things, but I've never felt that they totally didn't get it. And you never know. If you are really nice and supportive of them, too, you just may influence someone for the future!
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  #14  
January 13th, 2008, 08:12 PM
shadowdweller's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: salt lake, utah
Posts: 2,269
Quote:
I'm on my second DDC. It's what you make it. I feel plenty supported on there. Sure, most people are having tons of u/s, all the prenatal tests possible, and medicated hospital births, but the June DDC at least is quite open to how I'm doing things. The July 06 PR was the same way. I don't think people who trust their OBs 100% always really understand those who question things, but I've never felt that they totally didn't get it. And you never know. If you are really nice and supportive of them, too, you just may influence someone for the future![/b]
oh, i'm not saying it's not a great ddc, because it is! they are really sweet, and i know they mean well when they tell me my doctor wouldn't recommend it if it wasn't totally safe. and i say, actually i haven't found a doctor to do it yet, my m/w and i have discussed all the possible risks and still think it's the best route for me to take. i have a healthy baby but a cervix which is already effacing. i'm only 11.5 weeks.
and yeah, i hope at least one woman considers an alternative to OB-worship because of me.
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