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  #1  
February 24th, 2008, 10:37 AM
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Location: Utah, USA
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This is my first time coming to this board but I thought maybe you ladies could help me out.

My name is Melissa. I have two previous children and I'm almost 20 weeks with my third (and planned to be last) baby. I had my other two babies in the hospital unmedicated (planned unmedicated. I don't want medication.) I was so sure up until a few days ago that I was going to have this one that way too. I had an episiotomy with my my first (they wanted to get him out quicker because of his heart rate.) My second the episiotomy scar ripped right back open and then the tissue was so damaged that the stitches didn't hold and I had to get them removed and heal without stitches. So the other day I was talking to my best friend about my perineum and what I was going to do for it with this pregnancy/labor and that really got me thinking. I realized that I would have a lot more options to help prevent further damage if I would do a home birth. Then I started making a pro/con list in my head and I realized that the pros in home birth far outweighed the ones for the hospital and not just in perineum care but in all areas of labor. Which I should have known anyway because my best friend has had all 4 of her babies at home (and my mom had two out of three of her kids at home.) I've always thought I was doing the best thing for me by going to a CNM (instead of an OB) but still going to the hospital. I really think I want to have a home birth but I'm scared to make the change. I love my CNM and I would have to find a Midwife instead. So if anyone has any advice or stories they would like to share that would be great. I'm especially interested in if anyone has experience with perineum damage and bleeding (I also bleed a bit more than normal and have issues with my iron levels being low.) I'm really wanting to try home birth I'm just a little scared of making the change.
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<span style="font-family:Verdana">- Melissa -</span>

Mommy to Christopher, Kaitlin & Isabella



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  #2  
February 24th, 2008, 04:12 PM
shadowdweller's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: salt lake, utah
Posts: 2,269
replied in ncb...
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  #3  
February 24th, 2008, 09:53 PM
ragmama's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Southern VA
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You're not crazy at all! Well, no more so than the rest of us...

A midwife at home is definitely more concerned with the perineum and avoiding tearing than an OB or CNM in a hospital setting would *typically* be...seems like their opinion is generally one of "oh well, we can just sew it back up if it tears" rather than trying to prevent those tears from happening. I'm sure you've read all about the things you can do at home to help - compresses, evening primrose oil, massage, etc.

Check out the birth stories in the subforums at the top of the page - there are so many beautiful stories there, including mine. I'm not sure if I mentioned my own perineum issues there, so I'll share quickly - I had a second degree tear with my first DD (born in a hospital - I had specifically asked not to have an episiotomy unless absolutely necessary.) My midwife told me that there was a good chance I would tear again because the area was already weakened from the first tear and stitches...and I did, I had another second degree tear during my homebirth (in the water). Only, this one hurt MUCH less - why that is, I have no idea. The midwife even stitched me up without a local anesthesia (I forget her reason) - which sounds like pure torture, but really wasn't at all bad. I think it had a LOT to do with the setting - it was just so much less chaotic at home, and having it done in my own bed, etc. So just something else to keep in mind - you may still tear at home, but it may not be as horrible an experience as before.

Anyway, sorry to ramble. Hope you'll hang around here, ask questions, share updates, etc. I know making the switch to a home birth is scary - it was scary for me, having had one child in the hospital already - but it's an amazing experience. Hope your birth is just the way you want it, whichever way you decide to go!
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mom to Rachael, 10 ~ Milly, 6 ~ foster mom (waiting on the next call)
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  #4  
February 25th, 2008, 08:49 AM
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Location: Utah, USA
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Thanks so much for the responses. I had a phone conversation with a midwife last night and I have an appointment with her today. The more I read and the look into home birth the more convinced I become that it's the option for me. I think I'll know by Tuesday afternoon which direction I'm going to go and right now I think that direction will be home birth!
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<span style="font-family:Verdana">- Melissa -</span>

Mommy to Christopher, Kaitlin & Isabella



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  #5  
February 25th, 2008, 03:01 PM
ShawnaCAN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Alberta, Canada
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I tore both times with my two hospital births. I've since had 3 homebirths, no tears at all for any of them. In fact, my biggest baby was just born on Valentine's Day and was 10lbs. I didn't even need an ice pack, no swelling or anything. Felt like I could go ride a bike the next day if I wanted to. I honestly think it was a combination of being able to birth in nice warm water and the significant difference in my ability to relax. In hospital I was stressed out having to argue with staff about avoiding certain interventions, it was cold, lots of unfamiliar noises and commotion. At home, I was at home. Relaxed, peaceful, everything was familiar, no stress. Made a huge difference for me physically, my hospital recoveries were quite a bit worse than my homebirth recoveries. My midwife didn't need to do anything special to prevent tearing, just being home in my pool was all the prevention I needed.
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  #6  
February 25th, 2008, 10:32 PM
ragmama's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Big ditto on the recovery time, Shawna - Amelia was 9 lbs, 6 ozs and I felt GREAT afterward. Even later the same day, I wanted to be up and doing things...it was HARD to stay in bed with baby for the next few days like the midwives told me to! And that was even *with* the tearing. I bet you really did feel wonderful!
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mom to Rachael, 10 ~ Milly, 6 ~ foster mom (waiting on the next call)
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  #7  
February 27th, 2008, 12:21 PM
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Thank you all so much for the responses! It helped a lot to hear about other experiences.

That being said I decided to go the home birth route. I told my CNM yesterday and she wasn't too happy but she respected my decision. She's been my care provider for the last years and I think she was really upset to see me go. If I could have had a home birth with her I would have. I've already interviewed on midwife but my CNM suggested another so I haven't decided if I'm going to interview her too or just go with the one I've already interviewed and like.

I'm really happy with my decision! I'm also nervous but it's because I'm nervous about going into unknown territory. Luckily I have my best friend who has had 4 home births so I'm sure she'll help see me through it.
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<span style="font-family:Verdana">- Melissa -</span>

Mommy to Christopher, Kaitlin & Isabella



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