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jenisuzy's ttc journal


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  #1  
May 27th, 2010, 03:28 PM
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Hi girls
Ive contemplated for a few wks now whether or not to start a journal myself....I am a JM addict and have learned so much by being on this site. I've followed many of your stories in the threads & also here in the journals and have finally decided I may as well "officially" start a journal of my own too, if ya dont mind. So, here's a little about our situation .... My DH & I are 34 (well, me almost) and we have been married 9yrs. When we first met, my DH wasnt all that into kids and I didnt really pursue the topic too much. I pretty much just put it on the back burner...We travelled, moved to a few different states due to his job, met lots of new friends and did some really fun things early on in our marriage (& we still do, for that matter) but once I turned 30 I really started to get the itch to come off the BCP and see what happened. Even then, DH was still hesitant, he is so set in his ways its hard sometimes to change that....but I just stuck with what he wanted to do, wait a little longer, a little longer and FINALLY in May 08 I came off the pill after much discussion. I was on cloud 9 !!!!Little did I know, 2yrs later to this month I'd still be sitting here waiting and waiting. For some crazy reason I thought it would be an instant happening, ha, yea right
After about a year had passed, I brought it up to my ob/gyn and she recommended some blood work for me, SA for DH and then thats when I found out that my progesterone was low so she prescribed me 3 rounds of Clomid. All those turned into a bust (although it def. was making me ovulate). Also I was shocked that DH's SA was "slightly abnormal" as they put it. His morph was a little low, I think 26% when >30% was norm. I believe the motility was a little low, but not bad as well. I remember crying when I found that out, it just seemed like it was one thing after another. Oh and she also did a sonohysterogram too. She never told me anything was wrong with that ..........(stay tuned for more on that), just that I should probably go see an RE. So I let a few more months pass, I was scared to death about going to an RE. But finally did. My initial meeting with him was great, he is such a calm, reassuring, soft spoken doc who just made me feel like I could make this happen. So he also shocked the crap outta me when HE told me that on the sonohysterogram I had done by my ob/gyn that a polyp was there. I was FUMING mad simply b/c my ob/gyn NEVER told me that !!!!!!!!! Holy smokes.......I was furious and then of course scared to death. My RE said to increase my chances, I should get that removed. So, went ahead & had that done the end of Jan. and at the same time he checked my tubes, got the all clear on that and said I had very mild endo & took care of that. Had me take 3 more rounds of Clomid even though at that point I knew it wasnt gonna work. So, 3 more negatives with those rounds....then just this month I switched to Femara. Took that with such better results (no side effects, I O'ed earlier than ever and my LP seems to be longer than it ever was before). So I will try a total of 5 more rounds of Femara & I just hope and pray this is it.....
DH & I have not sat down to even talk about pursuing more assistance....of course I would in a heartbeat I think. He has the "whatever is meant to happen, will happen approach" and I think that is the most frustrating part of the whole process. I would love, love, love to just forge ahead & try whatever I can to get the chance at that BFP. I have mentally though, told myself if these meds dont work, then I'm just stuck with letting nature do its course. I am scared to even bring up the topic of doing IUI or IVF with DH....I know that sounds horrible and I dont want to make him out to be a bad person at all. I love him to death and I just know its hard to explain by writing it out to people who dont know him...but anyways, my best shot at things are just having something happen with Femara alone. I dont keep him in tune with temping/OPK'ing or anything like that. Its best he just not know when its prime O time I think ......he does so great when we babysit our nephew, I cant help but sit there & think how he would be with a child of our own. It makes me so sad that we may never have that chance I have good days & bad days, where I'm totally gung-ho and making this work and then other days I just mentally tell myself its very much a potential reality I may be a childless woman which breaks my heart. I've thought about the possibilty of adoption too (actually DH brought that up once, in one of our discussions, I came across as anti-adoption at first) but have really opened my mind up after months of thinking about it.....
Well this is enough babbling to get my journal started I guess........I look forward to becoming more involved in everyone else's journeys since we are all in this big TTC Boat all together. Thanks for reading
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  #2  
May 27th, 2010, 08:00 PM
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Jeni I read your intro and I'm so sorry it's been such a struggle for you
You're going to love having a journal!
I hope the femara works for you and you get your soon!
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  #3  
May 28th, 2010, 03:35 AM
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TGIF !!!! Gonna be a crazy busy day at work but I'll be running for the door at 430p! Looking forward to a 3 day w/e and grilling out, swimming, hanging with friends, and finishing planting flowers all with hopes my pager doesn't go off since I'm on call for work. Well today is day SIX of this spotting business...its getting old. I'm going to call to pick up my femara just to have it to start on cd3 again here someday. What's everyone else doing this w/e?, I would loooove to see more of you test and get your bfp have a great day!
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  #4  
May 28th, 2010, 07:54 AM
ndsai05's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Hi Jeni! I'm Saira (27) DH is Becket (27 soon), and this is our 9th cycle. I'm so glad you started a journal! I'm sorry its been so long and such a struggle for you, but it sounds like Femara is exactly what you need. I really hope it works and you get your BFP soon!
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  #5  
May 28th, 2010, 09:38 AM
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thanks judy & saira
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  #6  
May 28th, 2010, 09:43 AM
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Hi Jeni It's so nice to meet you. I really hope your stay is short and sweet, you have already been through so much. I had already been ttc for 1 yr + when I started my journal.

I also has low progesterone and I am sure when I go for my follow up to the RE he will recommend Clomid ( I really hope to do it without). However, my acupuncturist has me on bio identical progesterone. Are you supplementing with any? How low were your numbers ( sorry to be nosy).

Your O looks nice and strong this cycle so I really hope this is it for you!
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  #7  
May 28th, 2010, 10:28 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hockey247 View Post
Hi Jeni It's so nice to meet you. I really hope your stay is short and sweet, you have already been through so much. I had already been ttc for 1 yr + when I started my journal.

I also has low progesterone and I am sure when I go for my follow up to the RE he will recommend Clomid ( I really hope to do it without). However, my acupuncturist has me on bio identical progesterone. Are you supplementing with any? How low were your numbers ( sorry to be nosy).

Your O looks nice and strong this cycle so I really hope this is it for you!
Nice to meet you My progesterone level was detected to be around 6 before I was presribed the Clomid. My doc wanted at least >10. If I could go back & do it over again, I would do Femara as my #1 choice by far !!!! Even though I didnt have too many side effects from clomid (other than being extra crabby, less CM) I have to say I felt NO side effects from Femara this cycle and it seemed to make my O happen a few days earlier than Clomid did. With both the Clomid & Femara though on the lowest dose, my 7DPO was >20 so I know both of them helped. I started using Emerita Progesterone Cream on my own, (didnt start using it until after I had my 7DPO drawn) just this cycle so I dont know if that + the Femara has lengthened my LP or what .... but I've never ever spotted this many days before AF either (although I feel crampy and just want AF to start already so I can move on to round 2 of Femara). I'm half tempted to stop using the cream and see if that jump starts the ugly witch .... when do you go for your f/u with the RE?
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  #8  
May 28th, 2010, 10:43 AM
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My 7 dpo progesterone draw was 6.97. I hope to follow up with my RE next Weds but if not my apt is not until 6/7 I had some pretty bad/ inconclusive HSG results so I have a ton to worry about besides a strong O. Did you RE explain why your O wasn't strong enough. I mean, they want a 10 to sustain pregnancy but 6 does show ovulation...right?

I don't know why you are spotting so early. Are you going to take an HPT to make sure you aren't before stopping the progesterone? If so, I really hope that its positive. I hate seeing someone go through what I have. I just decided to make lifestyle changes and acupuncture before I finally did the RE plunge. I'll research both Clomid and Femara. I don't even know the difference and keep you posted on what my RE says. It sounds like we have the same problem-- whatever that may be with both our progesterone levels being at 6.

Last edited by Hockey247; May 28th, 2010 at 10:53 AM.
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  #9  
May 29th, 2010, 04:42 AM
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Good morning & happy Saturday
Im hoping to make it a semi-productive day....I usualy dont go to the gym on the w/e but think I will this morning, while DH is out on a bike ride ...then we're off to go buy more plants/flowers and this afternoon hope to just veg outside by the pool, yay So I found it somewhat humorous last night, when DH tells me he accepted a side-job for this computer program thingy. I told him "great, I know exactly how we could use that $$, to help make a baby?" His response exactly "yea right" That's how excited he is about proceeding with anything other than me just taking meds. Oh well ......... i should be use to hearing his responses by now. I had the worst stomach pains every last night, I thought I was gonna die, seriously! I had felt crampy all day but then it turned into this sharp shooting pain. I dont know if it was just gas or what LOL but thank goodness this morning its gone and also my temp dropped, yipppppee. So day 7 of spotting maybe is coming to an end & AF can show up already.

Sam, my RE really didnt explain much about why my O was so low, just had me to take the meds and then discovered that boosted my prog. levels. Im not even going to waste taking any tests, and I decided last night & this am not to use any progesterone cream. Maybe that will bring on AF a few hrs. sooner. I did go ahead & pick up my next round of Femara so now its a waiting game.

Alrightly, that's all for now, I just want to say it is GREAT coming over here to journal section although I feel like there is so much to read and catch up on!!! Yikes, but its awesome to see some BFP's here lately from some of you
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  #10  
May 30th, 2010, 05:44 PM
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You obviously know your body best Yeah, I am going to ask the RE a lot of questions, if he allows me. I am sure I will post it in my journal. I know that the drugs help with progesterone levels but it makes me wonder what is going on with the egg that makes it not produce enough to begin with.

Sorry that dh isn't open to talks of further medical intervention. Mine is the same way. However, with the recent and horrible HSG that I had. I may have to really consider IVF as an option and this is something I am not willing to except yet.

I hope you had a great time at the pool and enjoy the rest of your weekend!!
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  #11  
May 30th, 2010, 07:59 PM
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i'm coming over to say hi in your journal..thanks for your nice little introduction in mine sweetie!..i'm looking forward to getting to know you and hope you get your bfp this cycle!..
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  #12  
May 31st, 2010, 04:34 AM
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Today I start round 2 of Femara....will take it CD3-7, I actually would have forgotton to start it today until I logged on here to type !!!! Yikes !! It seems like my mind has been elsewhere the last few days, just enjoying the long w/e & not thinking about much else. I feel behind on JM too so trying to catch up here a bit before I start cleaning house & having friends over again today. Hope everyone has a good day!
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  #13  
May 31st, 2010, 05:19 AM
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Hi jeni - we're cycle buddies! I hope the femara works for you! Have a great day!
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  #14  
May 31st, 2010, 01:10 PM
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Have a great day today!! I love entertaining but decided to relax today and am regretting it now. for starting Femara This is going to be it!
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  #15  
June 1st, 2010, 03:38 PM
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What a fun 3 day w/e...it was rough going back to work again today...but now I'm home relaxing, catching up on all my shows I dvr'd The housewives of NJ & NY are my favorites (although Bachelor/Bachelorette are my #1 show!!) I couldnt imagine living the lifestyle those housewives live! Anyways....while my SIL was over, she happened to mention she is not on any birth control right now, I was a bit shocked to say the least She is younger than DH & I & oopsie, got preggo about two yrs. ago. Of course the whole situation was NOT cool at the time, but its turned out to be a blessing for all of us & I just love my nephew. But the thought of another...I just dont think its right yet. She just bought her 1st house, and her boyfriend I wish would just grow up a bit (he's 5yrs younger than her). Anyways...sorry, just had to get that out. I literally cringed inside at the thought of her having baby #2 when she has no clue I've been trying so hard pretty much the same month that she got preggo on accident OK, enough of that, off to watch some junk tv!
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  #16  
June 1st, 2010, 04:11 PM
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I love junk TV. I have just recently started watching the Real Housewives of NJ- it's fabulous

That sucks about your SIL. Hopefully her boyfriend will mature enough if she were to get pregnant ( they hardly ever do). It's a good thing she has good family. It is also so hard to hear things like that when you have been trying for so long. I really hope the Femara does the trick for you this cycle.
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  #17  
June 3rd, 2010, 07:40 AM
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Happy thursday!
I feel in a funk yesterday and today..not sure why. Work has been slow so I think that's part of it. My internet @ home has been down so I've not had a chance to update my chart. I noticed today my link is showing I'm 20 dpo lol, yea, I wish b/c then I'd be preggo! Really I'm cd 6, have one more day of femara to go. Usually I'm not this antsy in the start of my cycle but gosh, o day seems sooooo far away! Well time to get back to my cookies n cream coffee, I treat myself to delish stuff every once in awhile
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  #18  
June 3rd, 2010, 07:48 AM
♥Ashley♥'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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20DPO huh....? That would be nice!!

Im glad you had such a nice long weekend, I did too and hated coming back to work!

Come on O!!!!!! When do you normally O when your on Femara?
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Cycle #1-9 - All Natural....5BFN's, 4BFP's (all ended in miscarriage)
Cycle #10-11 - Met with first RE, diagnosed with heterzygeous MTHFR mutation & slightly low SA on all counts. -BFN, Cycle #12 - First IUI+Trigger - BFN, Cycle #13 - BFN
Cycle #14-15 - Met with new RE, diagnosed with a blocked right tube that previous RE completely overlooked or didnt care to mention. Soy (120mg) - BFN
Cycle #16 - Clomid (100mg) - BFN, Cycle #17 - Clomid (100mg)+Trigger+IUI - BFN
Cycle #18 - Acupuncture+Clomid (100mg) - BFN
Cycle #19-27 - 2 Soy (160mg) cycles, the rest all natural also 30lbs lost!! - BFN's
Cycle #28 - New RE is GREAT! Put on bcp 7/6/11, Lap surgery 8/1/11- Tubal cyst (5cm) found and removed, Uterine Septum removed, and Stage II-III endo removed. Cycle #29 - All Natural - BFN, Cycle #30 - All Natural - BFN, Cycle#31 - All Natural - BFN, DONE TTC FOR NOW




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  #19  
June 3rd, 2010, 08:22 AM
ndsai05's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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LOL 20DPO that's awesome! I wish you really were! But, I really hope Femara works for you. I know what you mean, waiting to ovulate is such a pain!

I'm jealous of your coffee... it sounds delicious!
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  #20  
June 3rd, 2010, 08:52 AM
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ashley, last month was my 1st time, I got a + opk the morning of cd13 & that also ended up being my O day too. Clomid always made me O a few days later, I'm planning on using my better opks earlier this cycle so I don't miss seeing my surge like I almost did last month. If it all times out like I want then bd should be good (usually the start of a wek we are both too pooped out so I always hope for o time to be thurs- sat hee hee
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