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~~Katie's TTC Journal~~


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  #1  
November 8th, 2010, 01:37 PM
SpankyMagoo's Avatar Gonna make Jo a big sis
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Ive been wanting to start a TTC journal, and I was so excited when I saw there was a place for it on here. Starting this process has brought up so many emotions, mixed emotions, for me that I have to get it all down in writing. I’ll give you guys some background on myself first.

My husband, Michael, and I met back in high school. We flirted a lot and he asked me out repeatedly, but he was a bit of a man-***** in high school, and I was a goody-goody… so I rejected him. However, I REALLY liked him and kept in contact with him for 5 years on the internet. In 2006, I was living in Connecticut and he was living in NYC, so we decided to meet up. The attraction from way back when came right back, and that was it. We have been together ever since.

We got married in 2009 and always said that we would try for kids about a year later as long as finances are ok. Thanks to my impatience, we started right after our 1 year anniversary. Mike wanted to do things casually and just BD more and take our time getting pregnant. (I think he just wants this though cause he wants to do the naughty three times a day ) I, of course, cant do things halfway and immediately started reading anything and everything I could find on the internet. After 2 months of just using a calendar to try to predict ovulation, and not getting anywhere, I bought some OPKs. I consider this the real beginning of our attempts. (Since I know we weren’t BDing at the right time with the calendar method!)

So now we are on our second month with OPKs and tracking CM. This whole process so far has been such an emotional rollercoaster for me. I am both excited beyond belief and scared out of my mind… and being scared just makes me more scared because I feel like I shouldn’t feel that way, I should just be happy. But I cant help thinking about things that could go wrong and how much life will be different. Good different. But so different. I worry about being a good mom. I worry about how the pregnanacy will effect my bipolar (story for a different entry). I worry that something will be wrong with him/her. I know its ridiculous, and it in no way makes me want to not have kids, but I cant help thinking about the future.

Other than that, Mike and I are big time homebodies. We like videogames, cheesy horror movies, and board games. I work with kids that have severe disabilities and Mike sells works for a company that sells Resveratrol (the stuff in red wine that is supposed to be super good for you). We live in Gainesville, Florida (GO GATORS!) and have two cats, Link and Ganon.

Thanks guys for all your support. This board has been making TTC a super fun process for me!

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Last edited by SpankyMagoo; November 8th, 2010 at 01:42 PM.
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  #2  
November 8th, 2010, 01:48 PM
Hockey247's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Hi Katie!! Welcome to journals I am really glad you decided to make it over here. My name is Sam and I have been TTC a while now. I hope that you get your BFP soon so your stay will be short and sweet. If not, I look forward to getting to know you. I honestly do not know what I would have done without the journal section or the friendships that I have made here. I know you will love it.

BTW- I also live in Florida but S Florida and we have the same engagement ring. If its not exact-- it's really close!!
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  #3  
November 8th, 2010, 04:33 PM
rmarie9509's Avatar Liam's Mommy
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Hi Katie Welcome! Hope you get out of here soon!
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  #4  
November 8th, 2010, 06:40 PM
Jakaira s Mom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Welcome to journaling I am Nayomi. I hope you get your really, really soon!!!
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  #5  
November 8th, 2010, 06:43 PM
PinkCloud's Avatar It's a girl!!!
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Hi Katie, welcome to the journal section! I'm Christy (27) and my DH and I are going on our 3rd cycle TTC. I look forward to reading your journal and getting to know you as you TTC!
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  #6  
November 8th, 2010, 06:47 PM
SpankyMagoo's Avatar Gonna make Jo a big sis
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Here is my month so far... in picture form... Including symptoms... On an side note.... **** MY BOOBS HURT!! OW!

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Last edited by SpankyMagoo; November 8th, 2010 at 08:10 PM.
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  #7  
November 8th, 2010, 06:53 PM
PinkCloud's Avatar It's a girl!!!
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That's the cutest calendar!!! Do you temp, too? Lots of us girls here use Fertility Friend, which is also really easy to use if you're interested
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  #8  
November 8th, 2010, 06:58 PM
SpankyMagoo's Avatar Gonna make Jo a big sis
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I actually do use FF... I transfered all the info off of there... but I kinda like seeing it in calendar form as well... My husband gets less flustered when I show him the one I made instead of FF...

I tried temping for a month and thought it was such a pain in the butt that I never wanted to do it again... but if I go for a few more months with no then Im sure I will start temping again.
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  #9  
November 9th, 2010, 04:47 PM
SpankyMagoo's Avatar Gonna make Jo a big sis
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Today I am on CD 19 and either 6 or 7 DPO. I generally feel so crummy… my lower abdomen feels sore, my boobs are insanely sore, I have a dull headache… and I feel nauseas, though it’s the type of nausea you feel when your super hungry, but no food looks good to eat right now. Im moody as well. I took a HPT this morning and it was negative, but its still super early.

As great as all these symptoms sound, it could easily just be my horrible day that caused it. The kids at school were so awful all day. One girl tantrumed for an hour because we didn’t have any Cheez-its left. She screamed so loud, I literally couldn’t hear myself speaking. Another boy tantrumed all day and when he tantrums, he is exceptionally violent towards himself and us. So he banged his head on the floor so hard he is going to have a nasty mark tomorrow and almost broke my nose. Another girl had a severe seizure and we had to call an ambulance. Its days like this I just want to work in a cubicle.

So while my symptoms look promising… who knows.

Going to try to calm down with some hot cocoa and a Disney movie… now which one?
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  #10  
November 9th, 2010, 04:49 PM
Hockey247's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I think that calendar is adorable!! I think you definitely covered all bases and I really hope you are on your way to a nice BFP! I hope that the sore boobs for you is a symptom!! Are you going to test early?

I think we posted at the same time.. because I didn't see your last post until after. What a crazy day

I used to love Dumbo when I was a kid and have been really wanting to see it again. I love Disney movies.

Your symptoms sound fantastic !!
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  #11  
November 9th, 2010, 07:32 PM
rmarie9509's Avatar Liam's Mommy
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I love the calandar! What movie did you decide on?
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  #12  
November 10th, 2010, 03:59 AM
SpankyMagoo's Avatar Gonna make Jo a big sis
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I watched Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood... All my good Disney movies are still on VHS and I dont have a player... I thought some good ones may be on Netflix, but none I wanted to watch... So I settled for sappy.
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  #13  
November 10th, 2010, 06:12 PM
SpankyMagoo's Avatar Gonna make Jo a big sis
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Today I am either 7 or 8 dpo. I tested this morning and got a BFN. Thanks to a scolding from my fellow TTC1 members , I will not be testing again till Saturday… that day I will be 10 or 11 DPO…


My boobs still hurt, but not as much. I still have lower abdominal pain… but not as much. So Im thinking Im probably out this cycle since my strongest symptoms are slowly going away, but I will stay hopeful. Desperately craving Chinese Food… but that just means Im awake.


I am going to temp for the rest of the cycle, just to keep an eye on things. Im not an expert on temping yet though, so I wont necessarily know what I am looking at… But I thought it would make me feel better about not taking daily hpts when I can monitor other things. Yesterday my temp was 98.4 and today it was 98.57… up… I know up is good. ALSO... my cervical position is Low, Hard, and Open... dont know that that means.


OH! I had the most horrible dreams last night. It was one of those ones when you aren’t sure if you are dreaming or awake. In the dream, I was lying in bed trying to sleep. (Just like I was IRL)… then I notice 2 of my teeth are super loose. I played with them for several minutes wondering how this could have happened. Everytime I open and close my mouth it feels like I am knocking them out further. I get more and more and more stressed out until finally, I kinda come out of it and the first thing I did was check my teeth. Which of course are fine. But it scared the bananagrams out of me.


I have off work tomorrow, thank god. The children really needed a day off. The parents keep sending they in sick so no wonder with behavior is terrible. If I were at school with walking pneumonia or a sinus infection I would be pretty pissed off too!

Tomorrow I think I am going to go to Joann’s fabric and see what fabric I can get on sale… gotta start making x-mas presents. I have no idea what to make anyone. Maybe lap quilts… Im pretty good at those. Though I kidna wanted to make my Christmas presents because I thought it would be cheaper… I think I was sorely mistaken.



Here is my updated calendar:
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Last edited by SpankyMagoo; November 10th, 2010 at 06:22 PM.
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  #14  
November 10th, 2010, 06:33 PM
PinkCloud's Avatar It's a girl!!!
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Step away from the HPTs! lol I shouldn't talk, I love the HPTs early on in my 2ww, too. I just can't wait. I had a dream last month that I got a light second line on a FRER so I was dying to test because I thought my dream was going to come true. But it didnt. Blah. That was a crazy dream you had though! Did you look up what it meant?

You use FF, right? Can you post your ticker in your siggie so we can stalk your chart? Don't worry too much about your symptoms and all of that. Most girls (who aren't crazy symptom hunters like us here on JM! lol) don't even know they're pregnant for a few weeks so I would *try* not to stress over lack of symptoms.

Hang in there! Your 2ww is almost over and Saturday is almost here so you can test again! Lots and lots of that you get your
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  #15  
November 10th, 2010, 06:51 PM
SpankyMagoo's Avatar Gonna make Jo a big sis
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I looked up what it means, and it turns out it is one of the most common nightmares. There are a million different crazy interpretations of it....

Example #1: Problems with teeth.

In a dream, are your teeth falling out? This symbolizes rejection. Or you might be feeling powerless, unconfident, inferior, unattractive and unable to hold on to someone important to you.

Example #2: Teeth Falling Out

Are you going through a period of change in your life? When we are children, we lose our milk teeth as we begin to mature. The ritualising of this is seen in the story of the tooth fairy. Losing milk teeth is a sure sign of growing into our own personality. Anxiety. Teeth are the strongest visible part of the body and therefore if they crumble, decay or come loose, it can imply that our very foundations seem to be crumbling. It can also be seen as losing your smile. Emphasis on decay may show that you feel something important in your life is "dying".



My hypothesis is I am thinking about my dentist appointment next week


Yeah I will definitely try to figure out how to put it in my signature... I would love to have other peoples opinions on my chart.
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  #16  
November 11th, 2010, 06:57 PM
SpankyMagoo's Avatar Gonna make Jo a big sis
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I will not test tomorrow. I will not test tomorrow. I will not test tomorrow. I will not test tomorrow.
I will not test tomorrow. I will not test tomorrow. I will not test tomorrow. I will not test tomorrow.


Today I am 8 or 9 dpo. I have an overwhelming feeling that this month is not my month… so I am trying to stay calm and hopeful but realistic.


Symptoms are the same. Sore boobs, though not as bad as 2 days ago… the muscles right under my arms really seem to be taking the brunt of it. I am still having O-pain like pains but now they are on both sides and happen several times a day. Today I was kinda grumpy… but that could be anything. I woke up this morning with what felt like sinus infection… but with all the colds and flus going around… that could also be anything. So I feel like my symptoms don’t look as good as they used to.


I was really hoping to get good news before X-mas… maybe not a realistic goal… but my hope nonetheless. I only have one more shot at it if this cycle doesn’t work out. If it doesn’t happen by then, then I will set another goal  An October or November birthday sure would be nice…. I love fall.


Ive been thinking about the future… what might be happening in our lives next year. Maybe, next Christmas, I’ll be a mom. Next year, Mike maybe will have gotten a job with IBM and we need to move with a very pregnant me or a child in tow. Maybe then we could get settled down, and actually buy a house. Maybe we could move closer to my parents, whom I miss more than anything. Maybe we can go back to living in a climate that has more than 2 seasons… and I can see snow and foliage again. Maybe we will have saved enough money so that I can be a stay at home mom. Even for a little while.

I have so many hopes for the year to come. I just hope now that my thoughts aren’t getting too far ahead.



Probably not this month… but maybe next…. Maybe next month will be the best month of the year.
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  #17  
November 11th, 2010, 07:07 PM
kelbert's Avatar a.k.a. Kelli
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I am always thinking ahead.. right now I hope to have a fall baby. Doesn't hurt to think about those things!

Glad you aren't testing again until Saturday. I know that when I keep testing and seeing the BFNs it just really hurts... so waiting is good. Next cycle that I try again I won't do any testing early. Don't want the disappointment. And you are still early! Plenty of time for that BFP!

I have had teeth falling out dreams before. Freaked me out! I woke up and went and checked my teeth in the bathroom. I am really weird about my teeth.. I have had braces twice.. three times on the bottom.

Oh and now I want to watch a disney movie.. haha.
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  #18  
November 11th, 2010, 07:15 PM
SpankyMagoo's Avatar Gonna make Jo a big sis
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Thanks Kelli, the tooth thing really really creeped me out... Ive been flossing like a crazy person since... now my gums hurt like hell.

Tomorrow morning is going to be hard, I know Im gonna wanna test... but I really think I should wait... so I just have to get right up and pee in the toilet before I can get my hands on any tests!!! God Im a crazy person.

Oh... and i didnt end up watching a disney movie... but I did break out something way better.... FRAGGLE ROCK!!!!
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Last edited by SpankyMagoo; November 11th, 2010 at 07:21 PM.
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