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Jessica's TTC #1 Journey


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  #1  
February 26th, 2012, 10:02 PM
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Hello ladies!

My name is Jessica (26, almost 27) and my husband is Raif (29). We've been together almost seven years, and will be married for five years in September.

We met in University at the Jewish students association (Hillel) and were married a year after I graduated. We lived in Chicago for three years, on Campus working for Hillel for a year, and now we're in New York City in graduate school. My husband is studying to be a rabbi and I am in school to get a double master in Non-Profit Management and Jewish Studies.

We always discussed having children at 5 years, but with school and everything we figured it would be closer to 6. However, in the last few days, we realized that if I take a class in the summer, I would have a lot more flexibility in my schedule for my last three semesters, which prompted a serious conversation between us.

We decided that we will start in August 2012, to try to be due at the end of May, keep trying until I would be due in August, and then wait until I would be due after the end of the Fall 2013 semester.

Still, I've been pretty superstitious about reading/preparing and realizing it's like 6 months until we start trying, I'm getting things together as fast as I can. I like to be super prepared, so yeah. I ordered Taking Charge of Your Fertility yesterday. I wanted a place to talk about all of this, so I'm starting this journal! Looking forward to getting to know all of you!
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Thanks Jaidynsmum for the siggy!
My fertility blog: Only Infertile



NTNP since March 2012, TTC since August 2012, HSG = one blocked tube, SA = normal, 1st RE 7/11 - took a zillion tests, 2nd RE appt = Tubal issue with PCOS tendencies, possible polyp, August 2013 - possible polyp, September 2013 - new job, insurance change! January 2014 - new insurance, March 2014 - new RE appointment, then surprise BFP!

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  #2  
February 27th, 2012, 08:24 AM
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Welcome! You found a great place, and it's great that you are planning ahead while you are waiting to start TTC. This is a great board for all things related to TTC your first, and there are many of us vets who have been at this a long time, and can provide help where you need it. Feel free to jump into the boards anytime, this is a fantastic group of ladies!
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Our TTC Journey | View my pregnancy journals here or here
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  #3  
February 27th, 2012, 09:33 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kbpeanut View Post
Welcome! You found a great place, and it's great that you are planning ahead while you are waiting to start TTC. This is a great board for all things related to TTC your first, and there are many of us vets who have been at this a long time, and can provide help where you need it. Feel free to jump into the boards anytime, this is a fantastic group of ladies!
Thank you for the warm welcome Karin! I'm looking forward to sharing with you ladies and just enjoying this time in my life.

So, TCOYF is supposed to arrive on Wednesday, and DH wants to have another discussion about the whole TTC thing, which I understand. We talked about how great it was over the weekend and how much we want to do it, but I think he needs some more concrete ideas of what it will look like. I'm hoping TCOYF will help, which is why I ordered it first. I've also been looking at the Pregnancy, Preconception, and Parenting Preparation thread in WTTC, to find resources that will be useful for him as well.

I'm pretty sure he's ready though, aside from nerves and being practical. His immediate reaction when I laid out what I thought to him was that he would be so excited to be a father when he's 30, and that it would be great to be under 50 when the first one graduated from high school. Both his parents and my parents are older (his mom is about to turn 67) so it's something we've thought about. Mostly though, it was his excitement at the prospect, which was much higher than in previous discussions. Granted, this is the first time we've both been both excited and ready to make concrete plans.

I have started one small thing for TTC - getting more exercise. With being in grad school, I sit most of the time, so it's something that's kind of fallen to the wayside. I'm thin, but out of shape, especially in my core area, so I've queued up a bunch of workouts on Netflix and am aiming to start with 10 to 30 minutes of exercise most days of the week (skipping Wednesdays & Saturdays, most likely). The one I tried yesterday was a lot of fun, so I have at least one that will work well!
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Thanks Jaidynsmum for the siggy!
My fertility blog: Only Infertile



NTNP since March 2012, TTC since August 2012, HSG = one blocked tube, SA = normal, 1st RE 7/11 - took a zillion tests, 2nd RE appt = Tubal issue with PCOS tendencies, possible polyp, August 2013 - possible polyp, September 2013 - new job, insurance change! January 2014 - new insurance, March 2014 - new RE appointment, then surprise BFP!

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  #4  
February 27th, 2012, 09:44 AM
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That's great that you've started to get in shape. That can prove to be very important! You will be very pleased with the TCOYF book. I have it, and I love it. It's very helpful, and very insightful. I'm glad DH ius on board with TTC. We waited for 1 year after we got married to start. DH wanted me to himself for a year before trying for a baby. Well, back then, we didn't truly understand that in order to start a family, often times it's not as simple as "have sex, make baby". Over 3 years later, we're still here, TTC our first. Not trying to be discouraging, just a little something to keep in mind as you're having the talk with DH again. But it sounds like you've got a great plan in place, as you've worked it out such that you are planning your timing according to the schedule that works for you!

I would also recommend charting/temping. Get a BBT and start tracking your cycles. The sooner the better - even if you're not currently trying now, it will help you get a good handle on what your body is doing each month. That way, when it's time to start, you'll know what your cycles are like.

Welcome again, and as you are going through your WTTC journey, feel free to ask anything you'd like! Also, we have a chat on Tues nights, which is a great way to get to know some of us. Sometimes we talk TTC, sometimes not, but it's a great place to chat!

Have a super monday!
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  #5  
February 27th, 2012, 09:55 AM
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I ditto Karin on the congratulations for preparing ahead. I absolutely LOVED TCOYF! It's more about avoiding pregnancy, but if you try to time your BDing (baby dancing) around the time it says to avoid in the book, you'll be grand! I second Karin's information about it possibly taking a while, although trying not to be discouraging. We got pregnant our first cycle, but that pregnancy ended in a miscarriage, and we are back to TTC. I hope that doesn't happen to you, though! I agree with starting to chart now so you know your body better when the time comes.
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  #6  
February 27th, 2012, 02:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kbpeanut View Post
That's great that you've started to get in shape. That can prove to be very important! You will be very pleased with the TCOYF book. I have it, and I love it. It's very helpful, and very insightful. I'm glad DH ius on board with TTC. We waited for 1 year after we got married to start. DH wanted me to himself for a year before trying for a baby. Well, back then, we didn't truly understand that in order to start a family, often times it's not as simple as "have sex, make baby". Over 3 years later, we're still here, TTC our first. Not trying to be discouraging, just a little something to keep in mind as you're having the talk with DH again. But it sounds like you've got a great plan in place, as you've worked it out such that you are planning your timing according to the schedule that works for you!
I have one friend IRL that I told we're planning to try in September. She has one daughter who is just about 2 and they're trying to decide when to TTC #2 (I hope soon, because their daughter is beautiful and a wonderful child). They had trouble conceiving, but we also know people who didn't. She said the best attitude is to be ready to have a child nine months after you first start trying, AND know that it might take longer than that (even significantly longer). So that's how I've been thinking of it. I also know a little about it, since I myself am a miracle baby - my parents tried for 5 years, did some fertility stuff (what was available then and where they were - not America) so it's out there in my conscious. I *think* she had PCOS (we haven't talked about it much...) but I take very heavily after my dad, so I'm hopeful that I missed that. Right now, our assumption is that everything is fine until proven otherwise.

Quote:
I would also recommend charting/temping. Get a BBT and start tracking your cycles. The sooner the better - even if you're not currently trying now, it will help you get a good handle on what your body is doing each month. That way, when it's time to start, you'll know what your cycles are like.
Will it work when I'm still on BC? Not planning on coming off until May or June at this point...or is it just good to get in the habit?

Quote:
Welcome again, and as you are going through your WTTC journey, feel free to ask anything you'd like! Also, we have a chat on Tues nights, which is a great way to get to know some of us. Sometimes we talk TTC, sometimes not, but it's a great place to chat!

Have a super monday!
Thank you! I am planning on coming to the chat - it sounds like fun! I have my knitting group until 9pm, so I might be a little late, but hopefully I'll get to be there!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Belita View Post
I ditto Karin on the congratulations for preparing ahead. I absolutely LOVED TCOYF! It's more about avoiding pregnancy, but if you try to time your BDing (baby dancing) around the time it says to avoid in the book, you'll be grand! I second Karin's information about it possibly taking a while, although trying not to be discouraging. We got pregnant our first cycle, but that pregnancy ended in a miscarriage, and we are back to TTC. I hope that doesn't happen to you, though! I agree with starting to chart now so you know your body better when the time comes.
I appreciate all the support! As I mentioned above, I totally get it about not expecting miracles immediately! I am going to head over to your journal and catch up when I have a minute again. My mom also had two miscarriages, and I know a lot of friends who have had them. They're amazingly common, but totally not talked about outside of boards like this, which I feel like is just sad.

Happy Monday everyone!

ETA: Just got a message from Amazon that my TCOYF will arrive tomorrow instead of Wednesday
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Thanks Jaidynsmum for the siggy!
My fertility blog: Only Infertile



NTNP since March 2012, TTC since August 2012, HSG = one blocked tube, SA = normal, 1st RE 7/11 - took a zillion tests, 2nd RE appt = Tubal issue with PCOS tendencies, possible polyp, August 2013 - possible polyp, September 2013 - new job, insurance change! January 2014 - new insurance, March 2014 - new RE appointment, then surprise BFP!

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  #7  
February 27th, 2012, 05:02 PM
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Welcome! That's great you started a journal right away! Karin and Robyn are right in the fact it can take time but on the other hand it can happen right away for the few lucky ones! Now that you know you are ready, it's great you are taking the first step in preparing your health before you begin. Good luck on your journey and once you decide to make it offical I hope your stay will be short and sweet!
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  #8  
February 27th, 2012, 05:31 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kbpeanut View Post
That's great that you've started to get in shape. That can prove to be very important! You will be very pleased with the TCOYF book. I have it, and I love it. It's very helpful, and very insightful. I'm glad DH ius on board with TTC. We waited for 1 year after we got married to start. DH wanted me to himself for a year before trying for a baby. Well, back then, we didn't truly understand that in order to start a family, often times it's not as simple as "have sex, make baby". Over 3 years later, we're still here, TTC our first. Not trying to be discouraging, just a little something to keep in mind as you're having the talk with DH again. But it sounds like you've got a great plan in place, as you've worked it out such that you are planning your timing according to the schedule that works for you!
We were young so we didn't want to start right after we got married. I am hopeful that things will work right away, but I have a friend (the only one IRL that knows we're planning on TTC in August) who had some difficulties, and she says to plan like you'll have a baby 9 months after you start but know that it could take longer than that. I'm a miracle baby - my parents had been trying for 5 years when I was born, doing what fertility treatment was available then.

Quote:
I would also recommend charting/temping. Get a BBT and start tracking your cycles. The sooner the better - even if you're not currently trying now, it will help you get a good handle on what your body is doing each month. That way, when it's time to start, you'll know what your cycles are like.
Will that still be useful when I'm still on birth control? I hadn't planned on coming off until May/June...

Quote:
Welcome again, and as you are going through your WTTC journey, feel free to ask anything you'd like! Also, we have a chat on Tues nights, which is a great way to get to know some of us. Sometimes we talk TTC, sometimes not, but it's a great place to chat!

Have a super monday!
Thanks for the warm welcome! I'm looking forward to the chat tomorrow.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Belita View Post
I ditto Karin on the congratulations for preparing ahead. I absolutely LOVED TCOYF! It's more about avoiding pregnancy, but if you try to time your BDing (baby dancing) around the time it says to avoid in the book, you'll be grand! I second Karin's information about it possibly taking a while, although trying not to be discouraging. We got pregnant our first cycle, but that pregnancy ended in a miscarriage, and we are back to TTC. I hope that doesn't happen to you, though! I agree with starting to chart now so you know your body better when the time comes.
Thank you! My mom had two miscarriages, and several of my friends have had then, but it's sort of terrible how people don't talk about it at all - like it doesn't happen.

Quote:
Originally Posted by blueeyes25s View Post
Welcome! That's great you started a journal right away! Karin and Robyn are right in the fact it can take time but on the other hand it can happen right away for the few lucky ones! Now that you know you are ready, it's great you are taking the first step in preparing your health before you begin. Good luck on your journey and once you decide to make it offical I hope your stay will be short and sweet!
Thank you!!! I'm looking forward to learning more and sharing with everyone!
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Thanks Jaidynsmum for the siggy!
My fertility blog: Only Infertile



NTNP since March 2012, TTC since August 2012, HSG = one blocked tube, SA = normal, 1st RE 7/11 - took a zillion tests, 2nd RE appt = Tubal issue with PCOS tendencies, possible polyp, August 2013 - possible polyp, September 2013 - new job, insurance change! January 2014 - new insurance, March 2014 - new RE appointment, then surprise BFP!

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  #9  
February 27th, 2012, 05:44 PM
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double post
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Thanks Jaidynsmum for the siggy!
My fertility blog: Only Infertile



NTNP since March 2012, TTC since August 2012, HSG = one blocked tube, SA = normal, 1st RE 7/11 - took a zillion tests, 2nd RE appt = Tubal issue with PCOS tendencies, possible polyp, August 2013 - possible polyp, September 2013 - new job, insurance change! January 2014 - new insurance, March 2014 - new RE appointment, then surprise BFP!


Last edited by BabyBirdies; February 28th, 2012 at 08:50 AM.
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  #10  
February 27th, 2012, 08:40 PM
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double post
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Thanks Jaidynsmum for the siggy!
My fertility blog: Only Infertile



NTNP since March 2012, TTC since August 2012, HSG = one blocked tube, SA = normal, 1st RE 7/11 - took a zillion tests, 2nd RE appt = Tubal issue with PCOS tendencies, possible polyp, August 2013 - possible polyp, September 2013 - new job, insurance change! January 2014 - new insurance, March 2014 - new RE appointment, then surprise BFP!


Last edited by BabyBirdies; February 28th, 2012 at 08:49 AM.
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  #11  
February 28th, 2012, 09:12 AM
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Sorry for the double posts! Not exactly sure what happened, but I was having a terrible time posting last night. Anyone have any insights?

My copy of TCOYF is supposed to arrive today, but I haven't gotten an email from Amazon yet. Since we're in the city, we use Amazon locker to get stuff since it's like a post office box just for Amazon stuff, and the nearest one is pretty close by.

I've been daydreaming a lot.

A lot of it is logistical concerns. I.e., what does my insurance cover exactly? I need to find a new gynecologist who does baby stuff. And there's the recommendation floating around that you go to the dentist before you start trying, so I need to figure out when to do it. Not a huge deal, but it's through the dental school, so it's probably better to do it before the end of the semester since we're probably going to start trying just before the semester starts. I keep thinking about finances, but I need to chill a little on that, since it's hard to know exactly where we are until we get our taxes back. Maybe I'll do that this evening...

Because this is so new, I have such a desire to talk about it, but there's also the desire to be private about it and all of that. So I'm glad to have you and my friend Rebecca who knows, and that's all for now. My parents are coming into town in two weeks, but I feel like we probably won't tell them until we see them again in the summer. Or we'll do it over the phone. My mom HATES surprises as does my dad, so it's better to not go that route once we get pregnant I worry a little about that, since I think she might try to convince me to wait.

Other sort of silly things are on my mind too. I looked at an old name list I put together like a year ago, and it's just funny because I don't feel the same connection with the names. So that's sort of a bummer, to feel like I have to start over with the names. Oh well...least of our worries at this point! But who can tell their brain what to think about?
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Thanks Jaidynsmum for the siggy!
My fertility blog: Only Infertile



NTNP since March 2012, TTC since August 2012, HSG = one blocked tube, SA = normal, 1st RE 7/11 - took a zillion tests, 2nd RE appt = Tubal issue with PCOS tendencies, possible polyp, August 2013 - possible polyp, September 2013 - new job, insurance change! January 2014 - new insurance, March 2014 - new RE appointment, then surprise BFP!

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  #12  
February 28th, 2012, 12:52 PM
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I think it's perfectly normal to want to talk about ttc and that is all you have on your mind. I know that's all I could think about when DH said we can start trying; there are some days now where that is all I can think about . It is good to look at the financial aspects of it and it's good to get a medical exam and go to the dentist prior to ttc butt at the same time don't stress yourself out about it either. If you can stay relaxed that will be the best thing for you!

Don't feel you have to tell your parents your plan on ttc until you are ready. I did not share with my parents until I found out I was pregnant which ended in a miscarriage. They were very surprised and happy when I gave them the news!
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  #13  
February 28th, 2012, 02:55 PM
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I agree with Dawn.

I don't think there would be any benefit to charting your temps before coming off the pill since the point of charting is to pinpoint ovulation. The only benefit would be to get yourself in the habit, but I honestly had no trouble getting myself into the habit since I was so excited to TTC. I think it's good that you are planning to go off the pill before you start trying. It can teach you the best times to BD, since you'll know your fertile signs. I'm also convinced my miscarriage was because I got pregnant the cycle after coming off the pill. Many women have no trouble, but given the information I learned after my loss, I believe that my hormones were out of whack.
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  #14  
February 28th, 2012, 10:09 PM
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Well, as I mentioned in chat, my TCOYF arrived today. It's so much bigger than I expected, but I'm excited for it. I wish I had a great big chunk of time to read it but I have an essay due Thursday and midterms next week. Ugh.

So, DH surprised me today. He told me that he's been mentioning to the guys at his seminary that we are thinking of TTCing, which was a huge surprise to me. He said he needed to talk about it, especially to the other guys who have kids. It's pretty amazing to me, since I keep expecting him to get cold feet. I would totally respect his right to do that, but I'm just worried about getting my hopes up.

I also looked up my insurance and stuff, and apparently the hospital right nearby here is on my insurance AND has a natural birthing center. I looked around and found a doctor that I'm interested in meeting. At this point, there's no reason why I would be high risk, so that's exciting about the birth center.

And now, to browse TCOYF before bedtime...
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Thanks Jaidynsmum for the siggy!
My fertility blog: Only Infertile



NTNP since March 2012, TTC since August 2012, HSG = one blocked tube, SA = normal, 1st RE 7/11 - took a zillion tests, 2nd RE appt = Tubal issue with PCOS tendencies, possible polyp, August 2013 - possible polyp, September 2013 - new job, insurance change! January 2014 - new insurance, March 2014 - new RE appointment, then surprise BFP!

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  #15  
February 29th, 2012, 06:36 PM
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Aww...that's cute your DH did that .

Enjoy the book. I have not read it but I hear so many people here have so I have been thinking of picking it up!
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  #16  
February 29th, 2012, 06:57 PM
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That is so sweet your DH wanted to talk to people about it. My DH doesn't want to talk to anyone about it but me. I wish he wanted to talk about it to others.

I hope you find some good pockets of time to read it. I couldn't put it down!
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  #17  
March 4th, 2012, 08:35 PM
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Aww...that's cute your DH did that .

Enjoy the book. I have not read it but I hear so many people here have so I have been thinking of picking it up!
I read a bunch of it this weekend. There's a lot about how your cycles work, a chunk about pregnancy avoidance and a bunch about pregnancy achievement. It was pretty awesome - I think it will make it a lot easier to get pregnant. I'm planning to start temping when I stop taking BC - so that'll be in like May. I'm hoping by the time we decide to start TTCing I'll know what's going on in with my bodies.

I'm not sure what will happen when I start charting. The only problem is that when I was reading I kept being like "I'm sure, when I start temping I'll be annovulatory blah blah blah." I'm just going to ignore that feeling for right.

Quote:
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That is so sweet your DH wanted to talk to people about it. My DH doesn't want to talk to anyone about it but me. I wish he wanted to talk about it to others.

I hope you find some good pockets of time to read it. I couldn't put it down!
We went to Philadelphia this weekend, so I finished reading the part that I was supposed to read then. DH and I are switching on and off, so I only had to read part of it before it's his turn. It was really interesting.
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Thanks Jaidynsmum for the siggy!
My fertility blog: Only Infertile



NTNP since March 2012, TTC since August 2012, HSG = one blocked tube, SA = normal, 1st RE 7/11 - took a zillion tests, 2nd RE appt = Tubal issue with PCOS tendencies, possible polyp, August 2013 - possible polyp, September 2013 - new job, insurance change! January 2014 - new insurance, March 2014 - new RE appointment, then surprise BFP!

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  #18  
March 6th, 2012, 08:35 AM
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This is an "I'm frustrated with waiting" post. For those of you who have been struggling for a long time, feel free to ignore this, but I wanted to have a place to express this.

Hubby told me that another classmate of his and his wife are expecting in August. We don't tend to announce these things early in the Jewish community, so it makes sense that he's finding out now. By the time they have the baby, they'll have been married for just over two years. I know we weren't ready before now, and we're probably not ready until we said we'd start and BLAH BLAH BLAH. But right now, I'm like, ugh. Jealous. I really wouldn't trade the last 4.5 years for anything, but still. I just would like it to be our turn already. i keep being paranoid that something is going to happen to put us off, but at this point, I'm not sure what kind of huge event, barring some terrible family tragedy, that would make us not start trying at the end of the summer.

(There's also the part of me that wanted to be the first of the wives in our year to have a baby )
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Thanks Jaidynsmum for the siggy!
My fertility blog: Only Infertile



NTNP since March 2012, TTC since August 2012, HSG = one blocked tube, SA = normal, 1st RE 7/11 - took a zillion tests, 2nd RE appt = Tubal issue with PCOS tendencies, possible polyp, August 2013 - possible polyp, September 2013 - new job, insurance change! January 2014 - new insurance, March 2014 - new RE appointment, then surprise BFP!

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  #19  
March 6th, 2012, 10:13 AM
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I think that is an understandable way to feel. DH and I were originally going to wait to try until after Christmas, then it was going to be after an appointment I had at the beginning of February, but we went for it right after Thanksgiving! It's a different kind of ache, but it's an ache just the same.
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  #20  
March 6th, 2012, 02:42 PM
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Thanks Robyn, I appreciate it!

Also, I'm posting this here because I want to remember what kind of parent I want to be and the kind of people I want to be around:

Joy, or “Just Wait?” | Diving for Pearls
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Thanks Jaidynsmum for the siggy!
My fertility blog: Only Infertile



NTNP since March 2012, TTC since August 2012, HSG = one blocked tube, SA = normal, 1st RE 7/11 - took a zillion tests, 2nd RE appt = Tubal issue with PCOS tendencies, possible polyp, August 2013 - possible polyp, September 2013 - new job, insurance change! January 2014 - new insurance, March 2014 - new RE appointment, then surprise BFP!

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